Fooling Ourselves

How He Looked Heart-Broken....

It was time for the big game. The cheerleaders had just left the field and the boys had run on. They assumed their positions and my eyes were glued on Dylan as I took my seat. I hadn't spoken to him yet since he asked me to get the twins from the daycare and drop them home.

The game started and I watched as Jace grabbed the ball and passed it to the guys on the field. I had zoned out, not really interested in the game, I never actually was and got my phone checking my messages and my twitter. I decided to take some pictures to pass time.

"Are you really snapping pictures without me?" Ari complained.

"Obviously," I rolled my eyes at her, "You were busy drooling over James."

"He's so gorgeous," she blushed, "Look at him."

"Ari!" I whined.

"Okay fine," she gave in with a pout.

"Come on girls, let's get this game going," Alicia directed and we all got up from our seats and grabbed our pom-poms.

"D-Y-L-A-N! Dylan's got the ball again! Go Dylan, go, go, go Dylan!"

We cheered loudly with the help of the crowd. We watched as Dylan ran down the field and scored a touchdown. I felt my heart fly out of my chest.

"Oh my gosh! Yess!" I yelled excited along with the rest of the girls.

"And I'm the one drooling," Ari scoffed. I hit her lightly with my pom-pom.

"Well mine is justified. My boyfriend just scored," I told her happily.

"Say it any louder and people will actually learn that he is your boyfriend," she teased not knowing how much her words actually hurt me. I frowned internally and then returned my focus on the game as I tried to hide my hurt expression.

Everyone was on my case about this hiding thing but they didn't understand. I wanted people to know about Dylan and me. I had these crazy, over-bearing, strong feelings for Dylan and I wanted to be able to show him them in public but I had a brother, one who hated Dylan and I wanted to keep him also. Jace was everything I knew before and Dylan is what I wanted to know now and I couldn't risk losing either.

The game continued with Jace, Dylan and Theo being the main scorers for our side and James and Thai getting a few, now and then. We played a good game and won easily by at least twenty points. Everyone was so excited. The crowd ran onto the field. The cheerleaders attacked some of the guys. Ari ran over to James and kissed him and my eyes immediately searched for Dylan. I found him watching me but I was forced to look away as Jace lifted me and spun me around happily.

"Did you see me? That was my best game all season!" Jace cheered as he placed me back on my feet.

"I saw you! I saw you! You were great! Wow!" I pretended to be happy for him. I hadn't noticed him during the game at all. All I saw was Dylan. He ran off again and I searched for Dylan.

He was standing there with his helmet in his hands as he stared at me. His eyes pleaded with me to come over to him but I remained frozen in place. He looked so hurt and broken and it was probably because everyone had someone to run to but him. All he really had there was me and I refused to risk the loss of my brother.

As if he had reached his waiting limit, he visibly grew angry and gave me the dirtiest glare I had ever seen in my life and turned away from me. He walked out of sight and I felt my heart break as I recalled the way he scowled at me.

I decided, after a minute of remaining in my position lost as to what to do, that I was going to see him before I went home. I turned around heading for the girls' locker room to retrieve my stuff determined to see Dylan but I was pulled to a stop.

"Where you rushing to?" my brother asked suspiciously.

"Nowhere," I plastered a fake smile on my face.

"Great. The team is going out to celebrate," he informed me.

"So you'll be home late?" I concluded and he laughed and shook his head.

"The team involves the cheerleaders stupid."

"Oh. Yeah, right," I said feeling as though my intentions were defeated. I just wanted to be there for Dylan and Jace refused to let me do that, "Let's go then."

I could see Dylan later.

***

Dylan actually went out with the team. I don't know if it was to somehow show team spirit or because it was the end of the season of his last year in high school or perhaps just to hurt me but I was really starting to consider the latter one.

It happened to be Theo and Thai who kept an after party at their house. The whole school was invited apparently. Any ways, the cheerleaders and footballers kept to themselves mostly and it was fun. I was actually enjoying myself until the guys started drinking. Hard.

Ari and I were leaning on the counter in the kitchen and Dylan was at the other end. James, Theo, Thai and some other guys and cheerleaders were surrounding us. I was sipping on a cup with soda that Jace had given me before going off to dance with some girls. It was a guy on the team named Mark who started it.

"That chick over there clearly wants you Dylan. She's been watching you all night!" he shouted over the music. Dylan glanced at her and smirked in her direction before turning back around. I tensed.

"I'm not into blondes," he shrugged.

"Like the hair ever mattered," Mark laughed, "Oh come on! Don't be a wuss! It's not like you even have a girlfriend or anything."

"Like any girl is that special for me to want to settle," Dylan practically snarled directly at me and I looked away hurt, "You know what? I will go over to her!"

"I'll give you fifty bucks if you can get her to kiss you in two minutes," Mark told him. What was this dude's problem?

"Well I could always get fifty bucks richer," he smirked evilly at me and took the money from Mark. He winked at me and walked off. We all watched him as he moved from our section and approached the blonde.

He whispered something in her ear, staring at me in the process and she seemed to let out a girly giggle before he suddenly pulled her to him and covered her lips with his. I let out a silent sob and dropped my drink causing everyone to look at me.

"Umm," I cleared my throat, "Ari stepped on my foot."

"Sorry. I lost my balance," she went along with my lie.

Theo and Thai continued to stare at me knowing I was lying but I swallowed hard and looked away. Ari took my hand in hers, ready to pull me away in a bit. James didn't seem to notice anything and Mark and the other guys carried on with their stupidity.

"Not even thirty seconds and he kissed her. The man is a god," Mark joked and everyone laughed. Ari pulled on my hand and carried me away from them. She led me outside the house and pushed me towards my car.

"Go home. I'll tell them you felt sick," Ari instructed looking at me sadly. She hugged me tightly, "He was just trying to hurt you Skye."

"Well it worked because I'm hurt," the tears strolled down my cheek.

"I know but it'll be okay. Go home and get some rest. Think everything over in the morning. Okay?"

"Okay," I nodded and got in my car. I went directly home and straight to my room, changing out of my clothes and into my pyjamas before hugging my pillow to me and crying my heart out.