chapter 12

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To be conflicted is to be alive.

Three years later

I thought whatever attachment I felt when I was young would've faded over the course of these past few years, apparently not.

I've been living on Alderaan for a few weeks now, on my own. Master Gallia left me on my own mission for once, to assure that Alderaan remains a peaceful system. The planet was just as I had pictured as a child, calm and gorgeous.

I stared at the snow-capped mountains for who knows how long before reminding myself of my duties. I was staying in the capital of Aldera, where I was tasked with protecting the Queen, Breha Organa.

The duty wasn't much of a challenge, but I learned a lot about the pacifist Alderaanian values. I admired her war-free rule, after all, Jedi are meant to be peacekeepers, and that is the reputation I strive to achieve.

Throughout my time serving here, I found out I have a biological sister, Shri'a y/l/n. She was older than me, but we looked like twins, no one would be able to tell us apart purely by looks.

I was friendly with most people here in the capital, so I became quite highly esteemed within the people of Alderaan. It was flattering, but scary. One wrong move and I'd be doomed.

My business here was often dismissed by the queen, who saw no real threat to her life, though I always followed any orders I was given by her or the Council.

I honestly enjoyed the space from Coruscant, where everything is calm and positive, whereas places like the Jedi Temple back home brought back memories of things I long to forget forever. I've felt constant regret and pain from what I did to Anakin Skywalker, and more importantly, what I didn't do.

Part of me wants to see him again, but the logical part of me knows that would be extremely risky to my path with the Jedi Order. When I roam the streets of Aldera, sometimes I pick up random pieces of scrap and just think of him, of us, back in the workshop on Coruscant.

I usually just knock it off and scoff at my memories. I was dumb back then, but at least I handeled things with a certain maturity.

***

Ever since I arrived here, I've loved Alderaan more than I could have ever imagined. Thinking about being tasked with keeping the peace, I wonder how anyone could ever think to harm such an amazing planet, with such kind people.

Adi would check in on me every few days, to give me orders or just take into account how I was holding up without her. Today, I had the occasion of being greeted by her in the form of a hologram. "Good morning, Padawan."

I was pleased to see her again, she was a bit more cheery today, which is rare. "Hello, Master."

Adi clears her throat before continuing. "I think it's time for you to return to Coruscant."

I was a bit disappointed, but kept a light smile on my lips. "I'll be ready to leave at any moment."

Master Gallia nodded. "Arrive at the hangar in five minutes. Don't be late."

I was used to the rush, I ended the transmission and gathered my pre-packed bags. My things were always well organized, so it took less than a minute.

I ran down and headed for the hangar, my dark cloak flowed above my knees, I wore it when I would be travelling to better hide my identity.

I got to my destination with only a few seconds to spare. I boarded the nearest ship, I knew it was the one assigned to assist me on my return to the capital planet. It was small but quaint, perfect for the short journey.

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