MASK|✔®

Guilt and regret

EMELDA
Seeing both father and son bond was really making my stomach yearn for more.
At this moment where they were hugging each other even though little Alex was still slightly asleep it made me forget all the happenings during this past few days and I really wished for more, hoping nothing could come between me and Alex as for now.
Walking behind him into his office I saw that he was going to the direction and I had to follow him suit.
"And Stella! Cancel all my appointment and meetings,...." He said looking at her. And the last word he said yo her made me smile. "...lastly don't ever block my wife from coming to my office except you're tired of your job here.." He said as he turn and started walking back to his office .
I heard her mumbled an "okay! Sir, I promise it won't happen again..."
Closing the door behind himself he made his way to the long couch in his off and dropped a sleeping Alex on it. "I've missed you so much, Mel!.." He said smiling worriedly, all his intense on me were filled with regret and missed feelings. His blue eyes sparkled of love and affection.
"I've missed you too, Alex?" I said more like a question.
Looking at him really well, I noticed a few changes in him. He had that arrogant, cold and contrition feeling towards himself.
"When you left I searched for you, but I couldn't, Rex saw your phone at the road leading to the airport. I searched every country after searching Oklahoma your home town but couldn't get through to you, because I didn't remember to look over at your resume. I've missed, yearn and crave for you Mel! Just why didn't you tell me then you were pregnant? we could have sort something out...?" He asked, all his word sinking into me and making me feel what I hated most, regret...guilt...rue.
If only I didn't listen to my mind then, there was actually no body to blame for my misanthropy for him at that time when he had took my virginity.
Not that I didn't want him then or needed him but the loath I felt after everything made me whom I am today, it made me no my real self...it made me grow to this woman I've become...it made me who I am.., I even changed my hair to change my cool personality.
Looking at his eyes again, I found myself moving to his closeness, his fragrance hitting me at the strongest place of sense, my nose.
At that moment I knew I wanted him too close, the few gabs that was overing us and I didn't want any kind of space anymore so I learned closer and kept my hands on his broad chest.
His chest gave me warmth I never felt for the past two to three years after our last encounter.
I suddenly remembered that night and I grinned knowingly, "what?.." He asked obviously lost in my small wild land..wild land?.. Was it?.. Or maybe... I should say ...bad wild land because it had nude imagination which only I had...he was actually drunk so he was still lost because I cold only remember his words that night when he said I was tight for him.. And I was only his and none other guy would be able to fit me perfectly.
"Hmmm!.." I moaned as I felt his soft moist tongue on my mouth.
When he saw I was still lost and unwilling he used his teeth to bite a little at my lower lip and got his free entrance.
I was mesmerized with his kiss on me that I didn't hear little Alex wake.
I felt someone pulling on my fit and I thought it was Alex trying to reach for my gown..but no it had to be my sonny.. Alex jnr..
I quickly pulled away from the kiss and took a glance at the little hands dragging on my cloth on its silk.
"Okay! Now..baby, what's the matter, didn't even know you were already awake?..." I said leaning down to be a little taller than him.
He grinned at my gesture then hugged me laughing . .....but then he pulled away all of a sudden looking at the huge Alex with wide eyes.
Eyes that sparkled of happiness and love, he was totally mesmerized by the tall man standing close to us.
Yeah! He had to be concuss cause he never new who he was.
His little brain was still young so he would easily adapt to knowing his father now, and that was when I smiled because I would have regretted telling him if he had turned five... Because he would have hated me a little or more than little.
"Hey! Little man, come to papa.." Alex smiled widely talking to his son whom he had met few hours ago.
The little man at my side grind as he jumped on Alex's arm as if he weighed nothing..although he was small but his weight was that of a gorilla.
Seeing my son happy with his father made me realised that I was about .. Or they would have lost a great bond which they were having now.
And then guilt clouded my head as I turned to wipe out the little tear that was about falling from my eyes.