Chapter 42

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Raoul paid for our carriage ride home, and I was silent the whole way back. Erik had thought that I had fallen asleep, but I was really thinking about the discovery I had made at the deChagny's home,

When we finally arrived home, it was late. George was sitting in our living room reading a book, "The girls are asleep." He smiled and talked to Erik as they walked toward the door.

Erik returned and sat down next to me. "You're awfully quiet."

"How long have you known?" I asked quietly.

"I beg your pardon?" He said confused.

"Gustave... how long have you known?"

His jaw dropped.

"And take that God-dammed thing off your face," I barked. I was angry. I had become suddenly angry over this new information.

He removed his mask, "I've known for sure since the day Gisele was born. That's why all of that happened... I mean she suspected when he was born because of the way he looked. As he grew older, it became more obvious."

"So really you've had this suspicion the whole time we've known each other?"

"In a way yes. I don't understand why you're so upset. It's not as if I cheated on you..." he was clearly growing frustrated as was I.

"It's not that. It's that you've had this knowledge that you chose not to share with me. Me of all people... your wife, your confidant, your best friend." Tears of frustration began to pour from my eyes.

"You need to calm down. It's not good for you to get this worked up with the baby."

"Erik, was there ever a time that Christine asked you to leave me for her?"

"Not since we've married."

"When?" my heart ached.

"Right about when I had the bout of tuberculosis."

"What did you say?"

"Christ, Caroline," he slammed his fist into the arm of the couch, "I told her I was going to ride off into the sunset with her! What do you think I said?! I told her that I met someone... someone beautiful and kind that accepted the real me. Someone that made me feel loved... someone that cared for me a great deal. I told her I was happy for once," he stood up obviously angry and upset. He put his hand to his temple, "I didn't tell you because I didn't want to ruin what we had. It didn't matter because I was never going to have anything to do with Gustave until now. She wants me to give him music lessons after she passes. I will forever be Mr. Destler, his teacher."

"Erik..." I said quietly. My lip was quivering.

"No, don't. You started this fight. After all we've been through... you and me, I can't believe this is the way you handle this. You're my one and only, Caroline. If you can't see that by now, I don't know what we're doing here."

He stormed off into his music room leaving me to sit by myself. I began to sob into my hands. I did attack him for something that happened long before me. I was still angry that he hadn't told me, but I understood.

I continued crying into my hands until I felt a pair of warm arms embrace me. I looked up into Erik's eyes and saw the tears glistening, "I'm sorry," he said quietly.

"Me too."

"I didn't mean to upset you," he placed a kiss on my neck.

I shook my head and repeated, "I'm sorry."

He nuzzled his face into my neck and quieted me.

"You're everything to me, Erik. You are all I have. Please never leave me."

"Never."

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