Euphoria

Stand Still Like The Hummingbird. II

"Where are my fuckin' pills?!" Rue screamed as she kicked the door as hard a she possibly could. So hard that it became harder for me to keep my back against it "What did you do?!" she screeches as she continues her kicking until a foot makes its way threw the door nearly making contact with my own leg. My eyes darted up to where Leslie was now cradling Gia who had fallen back into her fetal position. "Where are they?! You wanna tell me what to do with my fuckin' life, huh?!" She continues and suddenly the pressure of her kicks became too much and I stumbled forward spinning around in time to see that Rue had fucking kicked the door down and that her furious glare aimed towards me "You wanna tell me to stop doin' drugs?! Huh, what the fuck else am I supposed to do, huh?!" She screams before she storms towards her mum "What do you want me to do?? What do you want me to fuckin' do?!" She screeches 

"Rue, please!" Gia sobs but it only infuriates her more and she grabs a pillow on the floor aiming at the wall behind her Mom and Gia

 "This is your fuckin' fault! You don't fuckin' recognize me? Well, neither do fuckin' I! I don't fuckin' recognize me either!" She screams as she makes her way out of the room knocking everything down in a fit of rage. I walk towards Gia laying a hand on her arm in some sort of comfort but she had now faced the wall sobbing. She was so tense I was almost a hundred percent sure she was pretending to be anywhere but where she fucking was. "Where did you put it? You wish I was different?! So do I! You fucking hate me?! So do I! Where did you fucking put them?! Fuck! Where'd you put it? Where's the fuckin' suitcase? Where's the fuckin' suitcase? Fuck. Where did you put it? Fuck." She screeches as the sound of her smashing shit echos throughout the house. I feel like I should've fucking warned her that Jules was in the house but to be fair the fact Jules was in the house had totally slipped my mind. Suddenly a tired sob ripped from Rues throat "Where did you put the fuckin' pills?" she sobs and I could hear her slumping against the wall. "Where did you put the pills? Where did you put them, Mom?" Hysterical sobs emerge and she sucks in rugged breaths as if she was struggling to breathe. You, you don't understand, Mom. It's not my suitcase." she continues crying and my breath hitched. It wasn't her suitcase. She was worried about it. Meaning it probably wasn't Fez's. Meaning she probably did what I feared and went to Lauries house. Made some sort of sick deal with her and now owed her a shit ton of money. "It's not mine. This is bad. This is really, really bad." she continues and Leslies eyes drift over to me with a questioning gaze. I didn't even dare to make eye contact with her. Instead I continued trying to comfort Gia. "I want to get clean. I can't do it. And I just-I don't wanna be here anymore. I'm sor-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to scare you. I, I just-I don't know what to do. I'm, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, Gia. I, I didn't, I didn't mean to." She sobs as she peers around the corners holding up her hand as if she was trying to tame us when none of us reacted she hid herself behind the wall again and continued her sobbing "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, but I need you to tell me where they are. I need you to tell me where the pills are, Mom. I need you to tell me where the suitcase is." she sniffles when I glance over at Leslie her face was stone cold and I knew one thing in that moment. That the pills were gone. Whatever Leslie had done with them there was no going back from. Suddenly Rue snapped again "Tell me where they are, Mom! Fuck! Aah! Where did you fucking put them?! I know they're fuckin' in here, Mom! I know they're in here! What did you do with them?! What did you do?! Where the fuck are they? What did you do with them?" She screams as she runs into her mums room and starts throwing shit around again. 

"We flushed 'em down the toilet." Jules flakey voice sounded throughout the house. Like a knife slicing into the dark silence. Leslie jumped up from the bed and walked towards the hallway. 

"You look embarrassed, Rue. You embarrassed 'cause Jules just heard everything you said?" Leslie says almost tauntingly. She was angry. She was hurt. It wasn't fun taking care of an addict and in many ways I related to her anger. "Don't cry. Own that shit. Own what you just said." Leslie continues and I jump up from the bed getting ready to defuse whatever situation was going to happen. When my eyes locked on Rue her jaw was clenched and heavy tears were slipping down her face.