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KEVIN AMAREE OEREZ SADDLE RIVER,NJ OOV
''She's so beautiful, what have you guys decided to name her'' the middle-aged woman behind the desk wondered looking over at the child with admiration in her eyes, Kay switched the position he held the child in bringing the newborn close to his chest.
''Heaven Kaori Perez''
''That name is beautiful just like all three of you'' The woman behind the desk complimented gaining a low chuckle from Kay, her eyes then landed on the woman who she assumed was the mother's child, she had been disengaged the whole time not even looking up from the ground.
Yes Malayah was sat right beside Kay but she wasn't present mentally, nothing that had been said since they were sat in this room went through Malayah's ears, the only sound she could hear was ringing. Kay knew that right now was a sensitive period and she was finding it hard to adjust to motherhood so he didn't want to force her to speak he was just happy to get out her out the house, when Heaven began whining Kay gently pat her back.
Most mothers meet their child and feel the connection and love instantly this wasn't the case for Malayah. Yes she was happy and energised throughout her whole pregnancy but due to all the complications that came with giving birth to Heaven Malayah had to spend a few weeks in hospital. Kay came to the assumption that the prolonged stay at hospital brought back memories for Malayah ultimately triggering her, but their midwife advised Kay to not worry stating that Malayah will eventually adjust but with the way the pass few weeks had been things were only getting worse.
It was clear that she was going through postpartum depression, whenever Kay would try to conversate with her she was either extremely happy or extremely rude and dismissive, there was no in-between with her mood swings. She spent hours on end asleep, she has even expressed to Kay that Heaven doesn't feel like her daughter, she also expressed how she felt worthless and had been speaking of suicide recently. Kay had tried everything and now officially felt stuck he payed for a private psychiatrist, a counsellor and he even invited the midwife to come and do more routinely home visits. But no one could get through to Malayah.
Their daughter Heaven had been on earth for three weeks and Kay could count on one hand how many times Malayah held the child, she helped in other areas by cleaning the home, doing Heaven's laundry and pumping a large supply of breast milk but in terms of actually looking after Heaven she was reluctant and would even go as far to leave the home unexpectedly when Kay would attempt to get her to hold their child or simply even look at Heaven.
It broke Malayah's heart to make eye contact with her newborn daughter, she felt absolutely useless and like she wasn't good enough for her child whenever she looked at Heaven all she saw was innocence and considering she hadn't been the greatest mother she felt an unbearable amount of guilt whenever she was in close proximity of her daughter. She so desperately wants to get better but doesn't know where to even begin as she can't identify what is wrong with herself.
