it's been ages (:
hello everyone, it's aliyah. a lot has changed since i have last updated this,,, journal? i guess we could call it that. i wonder how you all are doing. are you happier? have things changed?
things have definitely gotten better for me. i am getting good grades, i have a girlfriend, and im doing well at the things i love to do. i have joined the debate team at my school and overall improved my life by a ton. i hope i didn't worry any of you during my long absence, im not dead at least!!
looking back.. this journal or book or whatever you see it as, had really helped me express myself and work through my emotions. i documented how badly i wanted to kill myself, days i planned on killing myself, my depression, finding my way to accepting my sexuality (which has actually changed, im lesbian) and over all i really feel like without this outlet i would have been gone a long time ago.
i am not saying im 100%, is there ever a time that i will be though? i guess im saying that im no longer in tat deep dark hole i once was so stuck in. depression doesn't ever fully go away, and there are times where i feel it hit me like a truck. though, i have grown very much since i had last updated this book. i can say im okay. im okay.
im okay :)
so this is where it ends. this book is completed. thank you to everyone i have met along the way, to everyone who talked me out of doing something stupid. life gets harder but in a sense you grow along and learn to adapt. trust me if you are still stuck you will find your way out. there is always an end.
thank you, so so so much.
i love you. this was a journey. life is waiting for you, take advantage of the gifts you have, you are never alone.
- aliyah :)
