Quinn: Yo! We're back with the highest rated show on CBS-
Burr: That is not true.
Quinn: Hamilton Reacts to Stuff! Say hello, everyone!
Laurens: Hey, guys!
Herc: What's up, creatures???
Angelica: Good to see you all again.
Quinn: No Eliza today- something about feeling nauseous- but we've got Mr. Washington back! Great to have you again, sir!
Washington: It's great to be back, Quinn. Hello, everyone.
Quinn: So, we've got a request today from LunarSundae:
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Quinn: Oh boy.
Peggy: "Lams" letters?
Hamilton: What's this all about?
Quinn: You know what this is about.
[Alexander Hamilton, April 1779]
Cold in my professions, warm in [my] friendships, I wish, my Dear Laurens, it m[ight] be in my power, by action rather than words, [to] convince you that I love you. I shall only tell you that 'till you bade us Adieu, I hardly knew the value you had taught my heart to set upon you. Indeed, my friend, it was not well done. You know the opinion I entertain of mankind, and how much it is my desire to preserve myself free from particular attachments, and to keep my happiness independent on the caprice of others. You sh[ould] not have taken advantage of my sensibility to ste[al] into my affections without my consent. But as you have done it and as we are generally indulgent to those we love, I shall not scruple to pardon the fraud you have committed, on condition that for my sake, if not for your own, you will always continue to merit the partiality, which you have so artfully instilled into [me].
Angelica: What?
Herc: You love Laurens?
Hamilton: Like a brother! Obviously!
Angelica: So he "steals your affections" like a brother?
Laurens: Uh... thanks, man.
Hamilton: You're all taking this letter out of context!
Quinn: *sighs* Let's move on to the next letter, shall we?
And Now my Dear as we are upon the subject of wife, I empower and command you to get me one in Carolina. Such a wife as I want will, I know, be difficult to be found, but if you succeed, it will be the stronger proof of your zeal and dexterity. Take her description--She must be young, handsome (I lay most stress upon a good shape) sensible (a little learning will do), well bred, chaste and tender (I am an enthusiast in my notions of fidelity and fondness). But as to fortune, the larger stock of that the better.... Though I run no risk of going to Purgatory for my avarice, yet as money is an essential ingredient to happiness in this world--as I have not much of my own and as I am very little calculated to get more either by my address or industry; it must needs be, that my wife, if I get one, bring at least a sufficiency to administer to her own extravagances. N[ota] B[ene] [Note Well] You will be pleased to recollect in your negotiations that I have no invincible antipathy to the maidenly beauties & that I am willing to take the trouble of them upon myself.
