I Want You Here When I Wake Up

3

Harry's POV
I stood standing outside the door my hand reached for the doorknob, it hovered for what felt like an eternity. how was I going to bring this up without it seeming like a big deal to me? Before people became suspicious of my standing outside the door like a stalker I finally twisted the door handle and walked inside.

"Louis!" There was no answer. Dear Lord, what in the name of Nandos could the man be doing at 9:00 pm?
I tried again, giving him one last chance to show himself.

"Louis! Lou! Are you home" dead silence followed. Seriously where is this kid, was he on a date? Haha! Louis on a date! Now that's what stand up comedy is, I mean the last relationship he had ended a year after we became friends and he never goes out unless I drag his lazy bum anywhere.

Maybe he is playing hide and seek? If that's the case I should be able to find him in t- minus three minutes max. There are not many places to find in a two-bedroom dorm apartment, plus Louis is too tiny to climb on top of anything so his hiding spots were normally near the floor which is limited, to say the least.

It's been a whole ten minutes and I can't find him anywhere. I'm really starting to get worried and I can't keep walking for much longer, I can start to feel the protest rumbling from my back. I decided to check on the last place. Under my bed. The only time Lou won this game he hid under my bed because it was clean unlike his which looked like a pig stash.

I lifted the edge of the bed skirt and started leaning down, damn why do I have to be so tall? I was down just far enough for my eyes to scan the bottom of the floor. Nothing. Just as I was starting to bring my giant statue back up I froze.

" Holy sh*t" I felt like somebody placed a boulder the size of Britain on my back. I was paralyzed from the pressure, I dropped to the floor with a humongous thud, which I'll probably get a noise complaint from, and lay flat on my stomach.

Damn you, Louis, you and your stupid games have me on the floor unable to get the fook up. Laying on my stomach is not good when my back is acting up, so I pulled myself across the floor to the pull-out couch and managed to climb up it and sit up.

Maybe I should have stayed laying down, the minutes I was up in a straight position all I could feel was a flame shoot down from my neck to my mid-back. I clutched the arm of the couch until my buckles were white and sweaty. I closed my eyes and tried to breathe. The worst thing when I have flare-ups is sometimes I lose my breath to the pain which only makes the pain worse.

I closed my eyes and pictured the beautiful lake. With just the one thought I could feel my whole body relax. The image of a perfect world flooded into my brain. Harmony, love, music, I could see all of it there. After a few minutes, I was able to open my eyes and think properly again. That's when the anger flashed through me again. This time not at Louis, but rather at myself.

I'm supposed to be getting better at hiding this! What would Louis have thought if he walked in and saw me like this? He would insist on following me everywhere, wouldn't let me do anything by myself, he would never and I mean never stop asking me if I was alright. I guess I'm lucky he wasn't home, but that didn't make up for the fact that I just strangled the poor couch because I was in pain, the pain I could have avoided if he was home.

If I really want to convince Louis I'm okay I have to come up with a game plan. Luckily my bag is sitting at the other end of the couch. I unzip the largest pocket and grab my small writing notebook, normally I use it for songwriting for photography ideas and Louis knows it's completely off-limits to him so he certainly shouldn't find this list.

I wrote down everything I knew to trigger my episodes, long periods of sitting/standing, jumping, heavy lifting or lifting for any matter, bending down, and running was certainly put on the list after today.

Next, I wrote down what I knew could numb the pain. The obvious like medication, ice, and heat. Crap I still have to find my pain meds. I make a mental note and continue with my list. Well apparently strangling couches seem to work Sonia rite that down, adding squeezing a stress ball as that's probably more realistic to have around than a couch. But I need something less obvious, something Louis won't notice.

I ponder in my ideas for a while until it hits me. The lake! If I take my mind to the lake I'm able to control my breathing, I'm able to leave my entire body and just get lost in a daydream. Not only that but I seem to get motivated with my plan when I think of it too.   I'm a genius!

Just as I close my notebook and place it on the table I hear a sound coming from the front of the room. The door move was turning. Louis was coming home. I guess it's officially go-time for plan, get Louis if my back, to take action.

The door opens and I'm met with Louis' face and I felt my heart drop to the pit of my stomach. His eyes were red and swollen, the blue in his eyes looking dull and glazed over. He had been crying.

"Lou-"

"Harold stop I don't want to hear it" Louis cut me off and went straight to his room and locked the door. I was sitting on the couch, staring at the door down the hall.

What is up with him, Louis never cries, he doesn't deserve to cry. He is so caring, funny, and just an overall amazing person. I didn't know what to do, but at least this would make my plan easier to carry out. Louis won't be worried about me when he is upset, in fact, if I can cheer him up he'll definitely believe I'm okay.