Never in a Million Years ✔️

88-Sibling talks

Colton's been acting weird.

Like not the funny kind of weird that we'd all laugh at him about. The kind of weird that's making me think there's something wrong between us.

He's acting distant and he's not talking to me. Just me. He's fine with the boys and my dad and Cheri, but when it comes to me he barely says a word.

"Is it me or was Colton acting weird?" I question Beck as he and I clear off the table after dinner. It was our night to clean, the rest of our brothers left to do whatever it is they do and our parents went to living room to watch their usual Wednesday night show.

"He seemed fine, maybe a little quiet towards you," He looks up at me front he plate he was scrubbing "Why? Something wrong between you two?"

They still had no idea about Stanford. I've been trying to tell them, but every time I tried I chickened out.

"Go talk to him," My twin tells me "I got this,"

I just nod, placing the last plate in the sink before making my way up to my little brothers room. He was just sitting on his bed playing with an old tennis ball.

"Hey," I squeak

"What's up?" He huffs. Okay, so he was mildly annoyed with me. But why?

"Are you mad at me?" I question "Because I'm really sorry if I did something, I haven't been myself, and it's not an excuse if I was mean to you, I'm just having a hard time and-" I start to ramble. I had no idea why he was acting this way and I just wanted to know why.

"When were you gonna tell us you were leaving?" He cuts me off, just about slapping me in the face with his question.

"Wh-what?"

"I heard you and dad talking on Saturday B," he states "and every day I've gotten more and more pissed off at the fact that you haven't said anything to us." He says now looking at me "I have always had your back, and now you're leaving in two weeks and didn't even feel it was right to tell us right away?"

"I'm so sorry Colton, I just, every time I've tried I chickened out," I plop on the bed, sitting next to him

"Why?" He questions "It's gonna come out at some point, might as well give us time to at least say goodbye other than the day of,"

"I know," I nod. He was completely right, this isn't just me it's effecting, it's everyone.

"I don't want you to go yet," he huffs, his eyes brimming with tears "I don't want any of you to leave yet,"

"We gotta go bud," I smile sadly. We may fight and argue, but we really do love each other. He was my little brother, figuratively, he looked up to me.

"Yeah but it's so soon," he sniffles

"I'm sorry,"

"No I know why you're doing it," he wipes his nose and eyes "I just wish things were different,"

"Me too bud," I nod "I wish everything was different, this shit shouldn't have happened"

It wouldn't have if I wasn't a dumbass.

He just starts crying and the only thing I can do is hug him.

Arrex and Ace and Beck have all been struggling and we've all been there for eachother, but no one was there for Colton. Jordan was our best friend and brother, I guess it kind of just slipped our minds that Jordan was as much one of Coltons brothers as he was ours.

"It feels like everyone leaving and I can't do anything to stop it," he sobs

"Hey-hey where's all of this comin from?" I question. Sure it was partially me, but I was the only one leaving right now, just me.