Situation

Chapter 30: Tales of Drunk Caregivers

      "Wait, are Komui and Reever together?"

"Cross can do cartwheels?"

"Where did Bookman get kitty panties and a wedding dress?"

"Why was Tiedoll wearing a bikini, and how did he get painted green?"

Amazingly enough, these questions were asked during the game Lavi forced Lenalee, Kanda, and I to play. Though, I really didn't need any of the thoughts racing through my mind.

"Hey, guys! I'm back from my mission with Miranda!" an annoyingly familiar voice sounds from behind me. The bluenette beside me swallows his mouthful of soba and growls, "Yes, and it was so much more peaceful, too."

"Yu, I missed you!" the suicidal rabbit exclaims before throwing his arms around Kanda's neck. As I said, a suicidal rabbit, and his attempt would have succeeded if I hadn't come to the rescue, that rescue being kissing Kanda with plenty of tongue while Lenalee pulled Lavi to the other side of the table. I hear a few wolf whistles being released around the cafeteria before I pull away from my boyfriend, a string a saliva connecting us before it breaks and I wipe it away from my chin as Kanda does the same.

"Okay lovebirds, I don't need to see you guys make-out," Lenalee says, sitting across from me with Lavi in the chair beside her, across from Kanda. I say, "Well, you definitely seem fine with it when you get a nosebleed."

She laughs, "Exactly, I want to watch, but this is a new blouse that doesn't need blood splatters."

She emphasizes her point by smoothing the cranberry button-up, and I notice that it did look nice on her. I think about it for a moment and then say, "Next time you wear it, you should add a black mini-skirt and black and white striped leggings. A gold necklace would be good to go with it, too, or you could go for a gothic look with a black skull earring and necklace set."

"Thanks," she replies. "I was hoping to get a little advice from you. You are a much better fashion advisor than I am."

I smile, "Thanks."

Kanda and the rabbit are both staring at me somewhat like they did when they were informed I picked out her dress on the date to Red Lobster. Rolling my eyes, I mutter, "Can you guys stop staring at me? I mean, seriously, it's not like I invented the pencil!"

"Sorry, Allen," Lavi apologized, and Kanda mumbled something before returning to his soba. I know better than to think that my boyfriend would give me real apology in public, but I figure he might later.

"Hey, I have an idea!" the Baka Usagi says. "What if we had a competition?"

"No," Kanda growled.

"It'll be fun!"

"No."

"But-"

"No, now shut it."

I sigh, "Kanda, let's just listen, and if it's something stupid then you and I can go entertain ourselves."

"Fine, proceed Usagi," Kanda uttered, glaring at the rabbit. Said rabbit smiles and says, "Okay, well, we go back to one of our rooms and we each tell a story about our caregiver getting drunk. Whoever has the funniest story wins."

"I'm game," Lenalee says. "Komui got drunk once, and I didn't stop having nightmares for a week."

I laugh, "I want to hear this, so if it takes telling a story about Cross, fine."

"Che, whatever," Kanda said, and I say, "That's a yes. Let's go to our room. I think Lenalee might get in trouble if she's seen with three guys walking into her room."