My First Love

Graduation

Graduation. I'd been waiting for this day for years and it was finally here. It was nothing like what I dreamed it would be though. I mean sure it was.fun. I walked across the stage, grabbed my diploma, took tons of pictures and yes, I got to toss my cap into the air but still.... I wasn't happy because things were different.

" Congrats baby sister!" Joseph said rushing up to hug me. I hadn't seen him since christmas, but he'd flown out to california just to see me walk across the stage. In a lot of ways Joseph had changed. He'd matured. He was 21 now. His hair shorter, his style different, but in some ways he was still the same. He still liked screwing with me. I turned 18 a month ago, but somehow I didn't feel any different. Any older.

" Thanks Jo," I say. Mom and dad have to take tons of pictures of Jo and I before we could finally leave. My dad started the car, Joseph and I sitting in the backseat and mom in the passenger seat like old times.

" So how's it in Missouri son?" Dad asked casually. Joseph had been in college for three years for architecture and had picked up some lingo he'd claimed to have gotten in St. Louis. I thought it sounded kind of cool even though sometimes I don't know what it means sometimes.

"It's pretty cool, but I was talking to Drew the other day and we're just gonna spend the summer here." I froze. Joseph had said his name. Drew, my first love. A boy I hadn't seen in 3 years, but still remembered exactly how he sounded, how his skin felt, how he smelled, how he looked... So the boys were staying here for the summer? Like old times. I'd actually gotten used to living in the house alone after months of missing them.

I didn't want Drew coming back to town though because him coming back would mean admitting aloud that I'd changed. That things were different now. I had a ton of secrets now. Things I never wanted Drew to know. I missed him, I really did but with him gone, somehow things had gotten normal. My dad had forgiven me, I stopped neglecting my friends, and there was no drama.

Once I snapped out of my daze, I realized Joseph was staring at me. "You don't still like Drew do you?" he asks. I can feel my dad glaring at me through the rearview mirror. I don't have an answer.

When we reach home, my cell phone rings and I look down at it. A text. It reads: Meet me at the park.

I'm grabbing my car keys off the counter before I can even think about it... And when I get there, he's waiting for me. He's wearing a gray hoodie, hands in his pocket even though it isn't cold outside. I smile at him and he walks towards me. He wraps his arms around me and brushes his lips against mine. And no, he isn't Drew...

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-amara