I Am Not My Skin [ UNDER EDITING ]

Chapter 4:

We rushed out of the hospital together, I had never experienced such fast driving in my life. I mean these things are usually happening in the movies, and I for sure as hell am no Michelle Rodriguez, and to see a police car speeding off so fast without a high speed chase. I felt like a boss truth be told, and come to think of it I could get used to all of this, but no more cars and movies. My mother's phone call had me worried, I couldn't help but to think of Mrs. Brown and her state. How was she and has anyone told her of what happened to Jamal? No, no one wanted her to find out of his condition and what happened while he was in the holding cell. Mom promised she wouldn't peep as much as a single word. We all knew she wouldn't be able to handle it, and we were all concerned especially considering her health.

As we arrived I couldn't wait to jump out of the van. My mother looked at me strangely and I could tell judging by that look she was demanding answers, but no, this was not the time. I found Mrs. Brown laying in bed crying. She cried out of pain, and all I could think of was what was wrong with her? Then it hit me, the fall she took earlier. "Help me Drew, take me to the hospital baby please."

I waited by Mrs. Brown as I instructed my mother to call the ambulance. I told her what she needed to say because I knew they would take longer if she were to tell them another story.

As our health system always were packed or either taking their time. About five minutes later they arrived and Mrs. Brown was carefully taken out of the comfort of her bed, and into a stretcher. I went along with her for some support as Johnny followed behind us with my mother. Let her bite off his head instead. If I stand correct than she has tons of questions for him. Even though we were not dating, and with the fact that I just met the guy was beyond me, because there was no way my mother would allow him to breathe for one single moment. Poor Johnny.

* * *

We arrived with Mrs. Brown and she was immediately rushed into the hospital, the doctor had to inspect her first. As it was standard procedure to make sure she had no broken bones or blood clots, it was very much normal. I thought at first that it was just the cold and we took some tests, there was nothing indicating anything wrong with her blood, it was until we did a scan on her, and that's when we knew the truth.

I ran out of her room crying, I did not want to be part of this. I buried my face into my mother's chest. No, I refuse to do this, doctor Nicholson had to do this one without me. I saw as they rushed her off into the operating room, but before they could operate. I vaguely hear as the nurse call to me. She said Mrs. Brown wanted to tell me something. I wiped my face, and still I didn't want her to see me like this, not today, no. I dreaded going into that room because I knew what the outcome might be, I wouldn't be able to handle or take it. My heart was already torn once today and I promised myself never again will I allow this to happen.

"Drew baby, come closer don't be afraid." She said, I held my breath and I nearly cried in front of her as I inched closer. I literally had to fight against everything within me not to break down in front of her, and now that I was looking into her eyes I just couldn't tell her what happened or that a few doors down the hall Jamal was fighting for his life.

"Yes, Mrs. Brown? I heard you called." I said holding her hands, and standing beside her. She was such a caring and soft person to be going through what she now had, life was so unfair. It made me reflect on what my mother said, we live in a world where you have to be thankful for everything.

"Take good care of Jamal for me Drew, I know my time is up on this earth. We have come a long way to give up, if it does not end now, it will never end. This war of race is one us as humans don't need, bring peace, shine a light. Be their guidance, and show them Drew, only you can. Fight for what you have always believed in baby. We are not just another stereotype, we are more, we have accomplished more. Just look at yourself, you're a nurse in a time where young black women are being degraded you stand tall. You have always stood tall, be the change, but promise me one thing."

A tear rolled down my face. I kept my eyes locked on Mrs. Brown's. This was the hardest thing I ever had to do, never would I ever imagine this, my second mother would be on her death bed while I had to stand over her. Jamal deserved to have this moment and not me. His goodbye to Mrs. Brown will never come.

"Anything for you Mr. Brown."

"Promise me that you will take care of Jamal once I'm gone. He has no one, I'm the only one he has. Keep him on the right path only you know, please. I don't ever want him to feel alone. When you get to see him again give him a kiss for me on the forehead and tell him I love him. Hug him tight for me because if only they knew how much my baby has suffered, they would not rob him of his freedom. Drew…," Mr. Brown was right, Jamal has never had it easy. Before he moved in with Mrs. Brown, his stepfather would beat him up endlessly at the age of eight while his mother chanted on.

I literally had to put myself in the middle by protecting him which is why I have the scar on my forehead. It wasn't always this small, I never noticed until I was already home with Jamal. It didn't matter just as long as he was far and out of that hell-hole they were putting him through. I could never imagine how I'd react if someone were to treat Maya or Sam like with that much hate. I would literally strangle that person to death if they laid as much as a hand on one of them.

Mrs. Brown was the only person Jamal had left. His mother we both tried to help by getting her out of that toxic relationship, but it was too late, the inevitable happened. The next day when Jamal and I returned we found his mother laying in a pool of blood. It was until then did he realized that was never a home. I tried my best to help where I could. I helped Mrs. Brown put him through school, with the new year arriving I had a surprise for him. How will he ever get to enjoy it now, it was something I knew his heart desired most.

Jamal did excellent in school, he even has the highest grades. He even made Valedictorian and I couldn't be more proud. Now he'll never get to stand on that podium and give his speech. He had it all prepared and planned, we were gonna have a big party and celebrate Jamal all day long. It would have all been just for him, to celebrate all he achieved, and still would. I knew he had greater things awaiting for him in the future because he was such a bright soul. I couldn't have been more proud of him and how hard he worked each and everyday. He spoke of all the things he would do for his grandmother and how he was excited to be buying her a big house and work for her, and give her everything she wanted.

"Thank you," was the last words Mrs. Brown whispered into my ear before she closed her eyes. I silently went out of her room and stared at my mother in silence.

Without a word.

"What is wrong Drew? Baby what happened?" She kept asking. I had no words, I couldn't, I just couldn't speak. It all changed so suddenly, and all within a day's time. From this moment on nothing will ever be the same again.

"Mom," I felt her arms wrapped around me, she knew how fond I was of Mrs. Brown. I clung so tight onto my mother just thinking of how Jamal would take the news once he woke up. Oh poor Jamal, this will kill him, his grandmother was his everything, and for him there was no life after her. To think that it took just hours for his life to change. For everything to just disappear, and without us even grabbing onto the little hope we had left.

Life is so unfair.