I'm here

Thirty seven

"No Cassie, I-I can't" kiana stuttered after finally making her decision

"Okay that's fine we're bestfriends, I'm not going to force you into anything, it was just a suggestion" Cassie smiled at kiana taking her hand into hers across the scattered notebooks, "Don't worry I'm not hurt or upset" she reassured her, genuinely just putting the suggestion out there - but her and Kiana would always be friends first, sex was just a bonus the three times it happened

"It's just that- that it... it didn't feel right" Kiana tried to explain as before, she would of probably jumped at the opportunity but now there was Luca.

Her possessive Luca who she just walked out on even though he'd just opened up to her.

She felt like a terrible person and sleeping with Cassie wasn't going to help, no matter how good Cassie could surprisingly eat pussy for a straight girl.

"No because you're in love, it's clear... Even if you haven't been taking your medication which I thought you were because you were doing so well. But I will be making sure you do in the future because I don't want you to do anything dumb and reckless Ki" Cassie sympathised, "The thing is, I could tell. I could tell you're in love, or well, you like him a lot - straight away - because you're stressed as hell right now and you didn't kiss me, you didn't ask me to help you in a sexual way to get your mind off of things. You were the one to say no to us getting together this time. You stopped it because you know that you only want him touching you" Cassie explained as kiana truly realised her friend was right, how she'd been pushing away her feelings and using sex as a very bad and unprofessional escape to deny that everr since that first night in the bathroom with Luca she couldn't let go of that memory of him.

The memory of the man who oozed dominance and sex appeal but the moment they did have sex, he let her take control at moments. He didn't sit back and do it for his gain, he ensured he made her cum when he finally did and did it well. He fought back when she showed her dominance but let her have her fun.

Despite all their complicated emotions, work life and everything against them, they were made for each other - not just sexually but emotionally because of how much they'd started to open up to each other when it was threatened that they'd lose the other.

How much Luca had actually started to listen to her and didn't push her too far when it came to his life. His life that she only just found out about.

"But I can see that your head is still scrambled so I'm gonna head to bed, okay?" Cassie asked, as she noticed Kiana looked very spaced out and was clearly overthinking as usual, "Night" she smiled, squeezing her hand one more time reassuringly

"I think I'm going to head to bed as well, I need a clear head for, well... everything" kiana choked out a laugh at the shitshow that is her life right now.

Cassie didn't know what else she could say to help out her bestfriend, so she just brought her in for a hug as they usually made the other feel a bit better when they were down, especially during exam season back when they were in uni together.

Breaking away from their embrace, Kiana picked up Luca and Giovanni's notebooks and walked upstairs with them to put them in the locked spare room.

"Night" Cassie called out to Kiana as she went into hers and Tom's bedroom

"Night" Kiana genuinely smiled at Cassie as she couldn't be more thankful for a better friend than her. The amount Kiana had put her through with her high highs which resulted in very bad shopping sprees and a lot of debt a few years back and low lows of Kiana shutting everyone out - Cassie had always been there through it all, dragging Tom along to help.