Fanart by: @azuneekun on Tumblr
Requested by: @pansexual_OverlOad
A/N: Just letting ya'll know, there's gonna be a smidge of angst in this oneshot 👍
...
*ring ring*
You groan as you reach over and turn off your alarm, groggily opening your eyes at the sun peering through your blinds. You slowly make your way out of bed and catch a glimpse of yourself in a mirror. God, you look like shit.
Today, like many others, was a dysphoric day. Basically, you just feel a lot shittier these days, and they just make you wish you looked different than you did. After staring at yourself in the mirror for a few minutes, you take off your shirt and reach over for your binding tape. Inhaling quite a bit, you put it on tighter than usual, noticing that it was a little hard to breath, but hey, it made your chest flatter.
After getting ready for the day, you can't help but keep catching glimpses of yourself in the mirror, and feeling more and more insecure about yourself. But nonetheless, you had a farm to take care of.
You painstakingly took care of your farm duties for the majority of the day, before giving in and heading to the Saloon, needed a drink to calm yourself down. On the way down the mountain, you think of a certain person that has been taking up your mind recently.
Shane, although he was a jackass when you first moved in, you two had been getting really close. You both confided with each other, drinking in the Saloon together, sitting at the dock in the Cindernap Forest together, and just talking all about life and everything in it. It was nice, you felt like he was the only person who understood you, despite not knowing that you were trans.
Before you knew it, you were in-front of the Saloon, and before walking in, you notice how short of breath you were, ignoring it, you make your way in.
"Hi there Y/N!" Gus greets you upon entering, which you wave and give him a small smile. You order a drink and head over to Shane who's leaning against the back wall, drinking. "Hi Shane." You say, giving him a forced smile, god, you we're seriously out of breath.
"Oh, hi Y/N." He says, returning your smile with one of his own. "How was your day?" You ask, slowly sipping at your drink. "Eh, more or less, like usual." He responds, shrugging. "How's the farm?" He says, looking up from his drink. Opening your mouth to respond, you start to see small black dots fill your vision, and you stumble back onto the bar. "Y/N? You ok?" You try to readjust yourself, but you lose all control and fall down onto the floor, passing out.
"Y/N! Someone call Harvey!"
...
You wake up suddenly, almost shooting up from the bed, right before noticing you didn't have your binding tape on. You immediately start looking for it, and notice that you were in Harvey's clinic, and you paused to hear some voices just outside your room.
"God damn it Harvey, is he ok?"
"Shane, calm down, he's ok, he should wake up soon enough."
"Then why is it taking so long?!"
Just then, you see the door to your room open, and Harvey comes in, holding a clipboard and pen, with Shane following not too closely behind. "Oh! Y/N! You're awake!" Harvey says, giving you a warm smile. Shane moves out from behind him and exhales, relieved. "Oh thank Yoba." He says, and before he can step closer to you, Harvey stops him. "Shane, I need you to step outside for a moment while I talk to Y/N." He says, and Shane nods before heading outside.
...
"Y/N. You know you shouldn't be binding your chest so tightly." Harvey says softly, putting the clipboard and pen down. "I know." You say, defeated. "Especially with your occupation, binding so tightly can cause bruising in your ribs and other health issues." He says, sighing. "I understand, you want to look more male presenting, however, as your doctor, I have to prioritize your safety and health above everything else, so I recommend you spend at least a week without binding so that you can heal properly." Before you could protest, Harvey interrupts you. "And after that, I recommend that you get a binder, instead of using binding tape." He finishes off, as you shakily sigh. "I understand Doctor Harvey." You say, hunching over in your bed. "Would you like Shane to come in? He's really worried about you." Harvey says, giving you a small smile. You look up at Harvey with wide eyes, "Does he know?" You say, with a worried expression. "No, you can choose whether or not to tell him." Harvey says, putting a hand on your shoulder.
You agree to Harvey's request, letting Shane come into the room. As soon as he opened the door, Shane shot up and quickly walked in. "Y/N? What the hell happened back there?" He says, looking you up and down with a worried expression. You gulp hard, thinking of whether or not to tell him. You sigh, deciding to tell him.
"I was binding too tightly." You say, looking away. Shane stood there for a few seconds before realizing what you meant. "Y/N...you we're essentially suffocating yourself the entire day?" He says, looking at you with an upset expression. You stay quiet, looking down at your hands. "For how long?" You hear Shane say, making you look up. "What?" You say, your voice cracking. "For how long we're you hurting yourself like this?" Shane says, looking at you with a furrowed brows and clenched fists. "I don't know, whenever I had a dysphoric day, like maybe a few times a week?" You said, now looking directly at Shane. "And you never thought to talk to anyone about it?? You never thought about asking anyone for help?? With all the people who love, and care about you, all the while you're hurting yourself?" He almost yells out, startling you. "Hell Y/N, you never told me?? Y/N, I care about you too much for you to hurt yourself like this, I love you too much for you to hurt yourself like this!" He yells, making his way towards you. Without realizing what he had said, he puts your head onto his chest as he holds onto the back of your head.
You feel tears start to fall down your cheeks, as you wrap your arms around his waist, bringing him closer. "I'm sorry.." you say. He pulls your head away from his chest to wipe away your tears. "Promise me, Y/N. Promise me you won't ever do that again." He says, putting both hands on your face. "I promise." You say, putting your hands on top of his.
...
After that tearful exchange, you had left the clinic with Shane, and after a while, Shane had eventually reiterated his confession, which you happily returned. Soon, you two were officially boyfriends, and the whole town approved of you two.
"Babe?"
"Yea?" You say, looking over your shoulder to where Shane was, holding something behind his back. You two we're at your house, and you we're making some pepper poppers for the two of you to eat. "What do you have there love?" You say, putting down your knife to face him. "Just a little surprise." He says, giving you a big ol smile. You sigh happily, and make your way towards him. "What is it?" You say, trying to take a peek at it. To which he hides it further behind him.
"I got you this." He says, before pulling out a binder from behind him, to which you gasp, before reaching out your hands to grab it. "Now you can bind safer, until you can get top surgery." He says, you quickly engulf him in a hug, feeling small happy tears prick your eyes. "Thank you Shane." You say, looking up at him. "Of course Y/N." He says, as he gives you a long, loving kiss.
