Sometimes Love Is Not Enough

Chapter 03

Khushi

"Ay, Sanka Devi? Is everything alright?" Bua Ji asked as she narrowed her eyes and sat down on a chair next to me.
 
I looked at her with surprise but gave her a full smile and pretended to busy myself by eating one of the jalebis that I made as soon as I came and answered, "Of course, Bua Ji. Everything is fine. Why are you asking?"
 
"You made Jalebi! And you are asking me why." She replied and pushed the pile of Jalebi away from me to get my attention. "Tell me. Is everything fine between you and Arnav Babua?" No Bua ji. Nothing is fine. Because it never could be.
 
I pulled the platter back in front of me and ate another Jalebi before answering, "Everything is fine. And can't I come here when I miss you guys?" I wish I could tell you the truth, but if that Rakshas Laadgovener finds out, he will turn my remaining life into hell. As if he already didn't.
 
"Then why didn't you bring him with you?" She asked as she again pushed my Jalebis away. "Or Payaliya?" Because I want to keep him far away from you guys and Payaliya... she wouldn't go over her Hello-Hi-Bye-Bye.
 
"Your Arvan Babua had a really important meeting. And Payaliya is busy trying to win her mother-in-law over." It came out a bit harshly before I could stop myself. So I hurriedly added, frowning, "But if I'm troubling you that much, then tell me I'll go to Preeto's house." I pulled my jalebis back and continued eating them while avoiding her eyes.
 
"Hai re Nandkishore! When did I say that?" Bua Ji asked, exclaiming, before she turned me to face her, and suddenly she had a very serious look on her face. But avoiding it, I took another Jalebi and ate it. "Listen, Sanka Devi. I know that in the last few months, a lot of things have happened. And, if we want to live a happy life with the people we love, we must make sacrifices. But... only if those people are worth it. Only then. And always remember, no matter what happens, your Bua Ji is always with you and Payaliya. No matter what. Okay?"
 
I nodded with a smile as my eyes burned with the urge to cry at her words, and I hugged her tightly.
 
"Now, tell me honestly. Why are you here?" I heard her say this as she hugged me back. As she finished, I broke the hug and turned to my Jalebis. She really is my Bua Ji. But why Bua Ji? Why?... Why can't you just let this go? Hai, Devi Maiya! Please help me.
 
She glanced between me and my Jalebis for a few seconds before sighing and getting up.
 
"Fine... Don't tell me. But take your Jalebi back with you when you go. I won't keep them." She yelled as she walked back to the kitchen.
 
I smiled brightly before putting a Jalebi in my mouth, got up stumbling, took another in my hand, and followed behind to annoy her.

*

I leaned against the wall while gossiping with Bua Ji about our neighbors because she wouldn't let me cook. And when I asked why, she said she wanted to cook all my favorite foods for me.
 
"Bua Ji, after lunch, we'll go out to eat Gol Gappe and Chatt, okay?" I was beaming at the thought of eating them. The sweetness. The spiciness. The sourness. And, oh... the crunchiness. I swallowed deeply as I thought of eating them one by one. It was before Jiji's wedding when I last ate them. I haven't had it for almost six months now. But today.... today, nothing is going to stop me from eating them. No one can come between me, my Gol Gappe, and my Chatt. I'll eat as much as I want... But if I eat too much, then I'll get a stomach ache... No... Actually, it's a good idea. Then I can fall sick, and I'll be able to stay here. I won't have to go back to Shantivaan. On the other hand, I wonder who or what made them name it Shantivaan. Since there's no Shanti to find in that Vaan.
 
"Array, ay Sanka Devi!" Bua Ji shouted as she shook my shoulders.
 
"What? What? What happened?" I shouted back with wide eyes and looked around. "What?"
 
"Hai re Nandkishore!!... Go open the door. Someone's knocking." She replied as she got back to cooking and mumbled under her breath while shaking her head.
 
"I know you're saying something about me, Bua Ji. I'll open the door and come back." I said as I turned on my heels and headed for the door while Bua Ji shook her head, looking clearly done with me.
 
I'm 100% sure it's not Amma or Babu Ji since they went to the medical camp and won't be back before tomorrow. But whoever it is clearly doesn't have any sense of time. I mean, who comes to someone's house at lunch hour, and that too uninvited?
 
I took another jalebi from the table to eat before opening the door. But what can one do if Devi Maiya doesn't want you to eat it?
 
The jalebi fell from my hand as I found Arnav Ji standing before me.
 
"Aap?" I exclaimed loudly enough for Bua Ji to come running from the kitchen.
 
"What, Sanka Devi? Who is..." She stopped as soon as she noticed him. "Array, Arnav Babua! Come. Come inside."
 
She pushed me away from the door so he could enter, while he gave her a tight smile and followed her inside. I stood there for a second before picking up the fallen Jalebi, closing the door with more force than necessary, and walking back to the kitchen without giving him a glance.
 
As I threw the jalebi in the trash, Bua Ji returned and said, "For a second, I thought you were going to eat that."
 
I made a face while washing my hands and replied, "You go. I'll manage here."
 
"I'm fine here. You go." She replied as she continued stirring my favorite halwa. "And why did you wrap your dupatta around you like this? Fix it." Hmm, so that you can see the mark on my arm.
 
"I'm cold. That's why." I said this as I tried to take the ladle from her hand. But she pushed me away and glared at me.
 
"Fine. Then don't call me when you won't find your glasses." 
 
"You hid them again?" Bua Ji asked as I left. "Ay, Sanka Devi?"