Sometimes Love Is Not Enough

Chapter 13

Khushi

"Why? Why isn't love enough?" Arnav Ji asked as I tried to control my emotions. Is he that blind?... Can't he just see where our relationship is headed?

I took a deep breath before turning to face him and saying loudly, "Because I alone can't keep this relationship going."

"Khushi, what is this nonsense? How are you alone? I'm here with you." He said this as his eyebrows knitted in the center with confusion.

"Are you?... Really?"

"Yes, I am. I'm right here with you." He said this as he took a step toward me, and I stepped back.

"Then... Why? Why didn't this relationship work?" I bit the side of my cheek to stop myself from tearing up. "Why didn't I find you near me... when I needed you the most? Why didn't you say anything when your family insulted me and my family at every step?" I paused for a second. "Why... didn't you ask me if I was having an affair with Shyam Ji before forcing me to marry you?"

A tear fell from my eyes before I brushed it off and waited for him to answer.

"Whatever I did that night was for Di. And ..." He said this as he reached for my hand, but I took another step back, and my back met the wall. "I know I shouldn't have done that, but I didn't have any other option."

"You didn't have options?" I repeated his words, slightly raising my eyebrows as I looked up at his eyes. "You had thousands of them... You could've easily chosen not to destroy my life. You could've easily told Di about Shyam Ji... You could've done everything possible instead of making a decision by yourself."

He stared at me as both guilt and shock took hold of his eyes and said, "Khushi, I thought that..."

I huffed out a laugh as tears streaked down my face, and I shook my head in disbelief before interrupting, "You thought!" I inhaled deeply before continuing, "You thought it was your place to make a decision for Di? For her baby?... For me?"

"Khushi... I didn't know. I didn't know Shyam was lying. Trust me... He had said that he'd divorce Di for you. I was just trying to save Di's relationship... She loves him a lot." He pleaded. "..I had thought that if I married you, then maybe Shyam would back off and go back to Di."

"I know, you did all this for Di..." I looked at him while nodding. "But you could have at least been honest with me. That night..." My voice broke. "I pleaded... I begged... But you didn't listen to me. You didn't even think it was necessary to tell me the reason. Instead, you... you blackmailed me with Jiji." A tear fell from my eyes as I tilted my head to my side. "But thank God, this ended. I can finally leave now."

"Leave?... What do you mean?" He asked, confused, taking hold of my arms.

I stayed quiet for a moment before looking into his eyes and saying, "Your six-month marriage contract... ends today."

"And you want to leave." He said it after a minute of silence.

"Yes." My body trembled with the urge to cry as I saw the look in his eyes... He was hurt. More than hurt.

He nodded before letting go of my arms, then stood for a moment without moving, then looked at me. His eyes were wet with tears, but his face... His face was cold. And I knew what he was going to do. What he was going to say.

"You're not going anywhere..." He said this with his jaw clenched as he looked into my eyes without any emotion in his. "We are married, and we will stay together. Whether you like it or not."

I smiled slightly and shook my head before closing my eyes. I knew it... I knew he was going to say something like this. But... even though I was prepared... it still hurts. I had thought I was strong, but he proved again... I'm not strong enough. Not enough to fight him. But this time, I won't let him decide for me. And I won't let him blackmail me again...

"We will not... Not this time." I shook my head at him.

He stared at me for some time before closing his eyes and sighing deeply.

"Why?... Why are you doing this?" He said this as he opened his eyes and firmly held me by my arms. "I love you, Khushi... I wouldn't be able to live without you. Please, don't do this. Please." A tear fell from his eyes.

I swallowed deeply as I looked over his shoulder and tried to control my tears, but they slipped down my face as he stepped closer to me, and I closed my eyes to stop looking at him.

"Khushi, please... Please don't leave me. I... don't know what I'll do without you." I felt his forehead against mine as he finished.

Am I being too heartless?... Am I turning into him?... Should... Should I forgive him?... I can feel the pain in his voice. In his eyes.

"I'll do anything. Just tell me. I promise, I'll do anything. Just... don't leave me." I felt his warm breath against my face.

I felt my chest tighten... Why can't I just have anything ever?... He loves me... but I can't have him. He wants me, but he will never need me. Hai, Devi Maiya, why are you doing this to me?... Why can't he just let me go? Why can't he ever listen to me? Why can't he just think about me for once?... Why don't I have any say about my own life? Why does everyone want to control it?

"Arnav ji..."

"Please, Khushi." My throat tightened as he continued again and wrapped his arms around my back and my waist. "I can't live without you. I..."

I opened my eyes before breathing deeply and saying, "Let me go."

For a whole minute, he didn't move or say anything. He just held me in his arms, like I'd vanish if he let's go.

People only understand worth when they're about to lose something... Only if he had apologized before...

"I'm so sorry, Khushi. I'm so sorry... Please give me another chance. Please. I'll do anything to make you happy again." His muffled voice came from my neck, where he buried his face.

"Then let me go." I wrapped my arms around him and rested my cheek on his shoulder as tears fell on his sweater. He went still as he lifted his head but kept his arms around me. Instead of letting me go, he wrapped his arms more tightly around me and pressed his face against the crock of my neck again.