Suicide, Depression and Self-harm Quotes

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Just to warn anyone, this gets personal, and if you skip this I totally understand. You are all so amazingly beautiful, stay strong.

I've come to find that this loneliness is absolutely dreadful. It's suffocating me to the point where it's getting harder to keep on breathing. The silence is also excruciatingly unbearable, but being lonely surpasses the silence easily.

I never knew I'd feel so alone in a world full of people, where I'm surrounded by someone every day, and yet here I am. Completely and utterly alone and it's without a doubt terrifying. I can't fight off my demons alone and I'm just craving to talk to anyone when I'm alone in my bed at 3 am drowning in my sorrows and yet there's no one. I've made a mistake of trusting someone before and they didn't deserve that trust I had in them. I was stupid to think anyone would help me, comfort me, care and just be there for me. No one will and he proved that to me. Whenever I see him I think about how he saw my scars and I can't help but think if his thoughts are the same. I'm just some bother to him. I mean for fucks sake, I didn't ask him to "help" me, he made things worse for me. He found out by accident, and I'm sure as hell not looking for attention. But when I got it, I caved over those 4 am text messages and told him without a pause. I regret that, I could have denied everything but I finally thought I had someone there for me. It crushed me when I was wrong, oh so very wrong. He couldn't give two shits about me. It's not like we had a relationship or anything but it was nice to think someone could care. But he cares more for my twin sister, but I don't blame him, everyone does. She's so beautiful, and then there's me, I feel so ugly. I'm such a disappointment. So many things have gone wrong in my life and it all has broken me, no shattered me into a million pieces that I'm afraid no one wants to or even can pick up. No one knows all those things that cause me to shatter, not even the one I trusted, and I can honestly say that I don't know if anyone ever will. I'm so tired of crying myself to sleep. I'm tired and I don't want to be awake anymore in this labyrinth, but I was stupid once again and made a promise to myself that I wouldn't leave. That promise keeps getting harder to keep. On the outside I'm better than ever, I stopped wearing jeans in the summer despite my lies of them being cozy. I work out more but no one sees I eat less. I smile more even though sometimes it's so fake that barely I could believe it. On the inside I'm caving, I'm worse than ever. My thoughts turn to the worst. Yet no one fucking sees my bullshit lies and I'm too scared to tell anyone even a sliver of the truth again. I don't want to get hurt anymore. I'm just so fucking lonely and broken.

I'm sorry, my amazing readers, if this got a little too personal and ranty feeling but it was just part of the painful truth that I had to let out before it came out to someone else. There's still so much that I want to say but this will suffice. Thank you for reading! Oh and sorry for the cussing if you were offended. You are all so beautiful, try not to "go away" anytime soon. All my love and respect goes out to you. Maybe draw a butterfly on your beautiful skin to help you get through? Just a suggestion, but anyways thanks again!