Anxiety 40 - Anxious flights

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I stood under the spray of the shower frozen, I wasn't ready for today I mean I love Matt and I'm not nervous about seeing him its just I always felt like this the day after a panic attack. That sense of unease and uncertainty that follows you the next day and makes it hard to do something that you would normally find yourself doing, that feeling tends to follow you around for days after the initial panic attack just waiting for something that would set off the endless cycle. Its a feeling that I hate but its also a feeling that I've grown accustomed to and something I'm going to have to deal with today as there is no way I'm missing that flight to see Matt again, with this in mind I continued my shower forcing myself to continue on with my morning routine. I stepped out from under the spray of the shower shutting the spray off and grabbing a fluffy towel I re entered my room making a beeline to the pile of clothes that lay waiting for me on my bed quickly pulling on the undergarments before slipping into a pair of leggings and one of Matt's button ups that I stole off of him. I rolled up the sleeves of the button up as Matt is a giant and I am below average height annoyingly enough (but only just) and grabbed all the travel essentials that were still hanging out in my room bringing them downstairs with me

"Remy" I looked up pushing wavy auburn hair out of my face to see what David wanted "be safe" he spoke passing me my box of anxiety meds and a glass of water

"I will be Dave don't worry about me" I told him as I washed away my meds with a mouthful of water

"I always worry about you"

I smiled looking up at my roommate and brotherly figure "I wish you didn't sometimes" I then checked the clock "now come on David I need a lift to the airport"

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I had to take a deep calming breath when we finally arrived at the airport, my anxiety levels were all over the place and it seemed the closer I got to seeing Matt again the worse my anxiety became. I powered through it though pulling and tangling my fingers in my rubber bands that were permanently attached to my wrists even when in character. Luckily I didn't have to spend long hanging around the airport waiting for my flight

"Flight 305 to Los Angeles is now boarding"

I turned to David "I expect Bitsie to be fully moved in by the time I get back" I told him as a form of farewell

"Your wish is my command" David the pulled me into a hug "be safe kiddo" he murmured into my hair as we both clung to each other

"Ok" I promised before letting him go and walking to the departure gates.

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I couldn't concentrate the entire flight struggling to read a line in my book my anxiety really was awful today making it impossible to do simple mundane tasks like reading. I just hoped that this constant unease would lessen itself.

"We have now arrived in Los Angeles it is currently...." my breathing drowned out the sound of the pilot giving us the general arrival information as my anxiety decided to pay me a visit

"not now" I hissed under my breath as I felt the unease and panic start to bubble away under the surface of my skin "I can do this" I whispered to myself trying to put myself into a positive mind set. I took a few deep breaths to get my breathing back under control before deciding it would probably be a good idea to get off the plane.

"You can do this" I continued murmuring to myself as I walked through the airport to baggage claim "you are Remy Peterson you can do anything" I kept repeating these words to myself in hopes that I would start believing them. I finally started believing those words when I reached baggage claim watching the carousal waiting for my bright red suitcase to turn up and there it is! I speed walked to the carousal moving away from the pillar that I was previously leaning against and grabbed my suitcase plonking it on the ground next to me and grabbing the handle wheeling it away from the luggage covered carousal over to somewhere slightly quieter as I waited for Matt to turn up.

"Guess who" someone spoke from behind me as their hands covered my eyes a smile appeared on my face as I pretended to think about the answer

"hmm would it happen to be my boyfriend Matthew Daddario?" I questioned reaching up to grab hold of his hands and move them away from my face placing them to rest on my waist instead as I turned around in his arms to face him my smile growing even wider as I wrapped my arms around his neck and brought him down for a kiss hello

Matt laughed at me pulling away from the kiss "how awkward would that have been if it turned out to not be me?"

I lightly hit him on the chest "shut up you" I joked before leaning back in for another kiss previous anxiety now a buzzing noise in the background.

Man have I missed Matt.

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A/N guys isn't it a great time to be a geek! Just all the geeky things that are being announced and released....be still my beating heart I feel like I've died and gone to heaven like honestly the wizarding world is releasing and announcing so many things I'm crying like honestly I've missed the hype that comes with JK Rowling releasing things and then all the superhero news like Flash season 3!!!! And spiderman homecoming like I'm apprehensive about it but I think Tom Holland is amazing at portraying Peter and Spiderman normally the actors can only portray one of them really well like Tobey McGuire was a good Peter Parker but a rubbish Spiderman and Andrew Garfield was the perfect Spiderman but his hipster Peter Parker was meh. Ok anyway wheel it back in wheel it back in aren't Remy and Matt just adorable? And what did you think about Remy's battle with her anxiety in this chapter? It was a constant feature throughout the chapter and really allowed us to see a more vulnerable side to Remy. Anyway as of the 30th I will be away for four weeks so I'm sorry guys there will be no updates for a long time but I would love it if you still continued to comment and vote in the mean time.

Hundredlovers xox

P.S time to let you all know that I only own Remy and her storyline

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