Once Bitten: Twice Mad

Chapter Thirty-nine

Chapter Thirty-Nine:

Charlotte woke the next morning to find herself staring at Silas's back. This was the second morning in a row that she had awoken to his back. Before Grace had fallen ill, Charlotte had always slept wrapped tight in Silas's arms. He had always held her close and whispered words of love in the dawn. But now..... Now he seemed to avoid touching her, looking at her and speaking to her at all costs.

Charlotte knew he was hurting and she wanted to help him. She reached out an arm but the moment her skin touched Silas he rose from the bed as if scalded and slid on his boots.

"Where are you going?" Charlotte questioned quietly, swallowing back the tears that were trying to form.

"It is my turn in the engine." He replied quickly, his voice void of any emotion.

Charlotte felt something inside of her give under the pressure and her emotions suddenly snapped. She tossed back her covers and threw her feet over the side of the bed.

"Silas, stop!" she called out loudly, and his hand froze on the door handle. Charlotte knew the volume of her voice had more than likely startled the man and it had startled her as well. Charlotte was not the yelling type and yet she was desperate to reach him and nothing else she had done so far had worked.

Charlotte got to her feet and slid into her robe, crossing her arms over her chest and staring hard at her husband's broad back. "Silas, please talk to me."

There was a long sigh as Silas's shoulders drooped and his hand fell away from the door. "What do you want me to say?"

"Anything." Charlotte whispered. "Say anything. Just don't shut me out...."

"I don't have anything to say, Charlotte."

Charlotte felt her heart break. She was no longer 'Miss Charlotte', she was now just plain Charlotte. Something so simple shouldn't hurt as badly as it did.

"Silas, I need my husband."

He turned then and looked at her for the first time in two days. The sadness in his eyes stole Charlotte's breath as tears fell freely down her cheeks.

"I have work to do."

"Work that is more important than me?" Charlotte asked. When Silas said nothing in response and looked down at his feet, Charlotte strode toward him and laid her hand against his arm. "I need you, Silas, and I believe you need me too. We should be leaning on one another now and instead you are pushing me away."

"You don't understand." Silas snapped back as he stood a step away from her. "I watched her die—" his voice broke. "—I held her in my arms as she took her last breaths."

Charlotte closed the distance between them again and put her hands on his cheeks. "Silas, please, I need my husband back. I need...."

"I cannot be what you need, Charlotte. You will have to be strong for yourself because I cannot be that for you just now."

Charlotte clenched her fists, not liking the way he made her sound weak. This was not Silas. This was not her husband. Silas had always taken care of her. Had always been patient, strong and kind. She needed that man now, not this new man who seemed too wrapped up in himself and his own pain to let her in or attempt to help her through her own.

"I am the one who lost a child, Silas! My heart is shattered and I cannot even break down the smallest bit because you refuse to be even the least bit strong and supportive for me!"