Say That You Believe

/8/ The Believer

/8/ THE BELIEVER

That if ye thou shalt confess with
thy mouth Lord Jesus, and shalt
believe in thine heart that God hath
raise Him from the death, thou shalt
be saved

- Romans 10:9

KHEL'S POV

Around eight o'clock, natapos kaming mag-dinner ni Aunt Kyla. As a respectful nephew, tinulungan ko siyang magligpit ng mga pinggan at inilagay ito sa kitchen's sink.

"Ako na ang bahala rito. Mabuti pa't matulog ka na nang maaga," Aunt Kyla said as she smiled at me.

"Hmm... 'key." And I just agreed with it.

Because my aunt already insisted to wash the dishes, I decided to go upstairs and straight to my room. I turned the light's switch on, then locked the door.

Umupo ako sa kama at sumandal sa headboard. Kinuha ko ang laptop at pinatong ito sa aking kandungan. When I opened it, the screen instantly flashed my facebook account.

And at my friends' list, unang-una kong napansin ang pangalan na: Meera Guizon.

As her profile's pic; she wears white dress, with her long hair curtained over her shoulders down to her waist. And there's her sunny smile that could lighten up my eyes.

She looks like an angel. Though I don't believe in such but, you know... for a metaphor description, she looks like one.

Hindi ko namalayan na pinindot ko na pala ang profile n'ya. The laptop's screen viewed her recent posts. I scrolled down because of curiosity.

Then I saw a photo of Meera with her band. She's holding a guitar and two other guys beside her. What captures my eyes are their T-shirts imprinted with words saying: "We Sing To Praise Our Lord, Jesus".

Napangisi ako. A sarcastic grin. I almost curse out loud after reading it.

"Seriously?" singhal ko, nakangisi at napapailing. "As if there is. Tch."

Thus, I scroll down further. May nakita akong isang picture niya na naka-dress at nakatayo sa archway ng isang church. She's smiling at the camera with the white church as background.

Its caption says: "Sunday isn't the day in a week to worship God. Rather, Sunday is just one of the other days in a week to worship Him. Maligayang pagsisimba!"

Napataas ang kilay ko nang nabasa ito. Napaawang ang aking bibig, and my fingers brushed through my hair.

"This is..." Umiling-iling ako. "...cult."

I should've stop scrolling down. Walang kwenta ang laman ng account niya. Every post with her picture, it implies about Christianity. About their delusional "god". It doesn't make sense!

But why can't I stop scrolling the monitor down? Why do I keep at looking on her recent posts? Sh*t.

How stupid, Khel. You're stalking a girl. A christian f*cking girl!

To all the girls who tried to catch my attention before, this is the first time I was hooked up.

I could just ignore her profile, at the first place, and browse to other social media accounts. But, d*mn! I'm still stuck here, scrolling the monitor further down to her last month's posts.

Marami-rami rin akong nakita na litrato niya. It's random, but most of it shows about her christianity culture.

It's intriguing.

Habang nag-scroll down, napahinto ako nang may makita akong video clip. The thumbnail is Meera wearing a hospital gown. Nakaupo siya sa isang puting kama at may naka-inject na tube sa kaniyang kamay. Basically, it seems that that video was taken inside a hospital.

The caption is: "Merciful God, I fear no sickness for You are my Healer".

I literally frowned. Again, I got even more and more curious about her. Mabilis ko 'tong pinindot at hinintay na mag-loading. Then the video starts to play.

"We stand and lifted our hands, for the joy of the Lord is our strength. We bow down and worship Him now. How great, how awesome is He~"

I heard her beautiful voice as she sings with a smile. Her voice echoes inside the pure white room, while she's steadily sitting on the bed and strumming a guitar.

Her pale lips and skin evidently show that she was sick while filming this video.

"And together we sing. Everyone, sing! Holy is the Lord, God Almighty. The earth is filled with His glory. Holy is the----"

Hindi ko na pinatapos ang pinapanood ko. Kaagad ko 'tong itinigil at sinarado ang laptop. There is a moment of silence inside my bedroom.

Then I released an exasperated sigh, leaning my head against the bed's headboard, and stare blankly at the ceiling.

"Foolish people," I whispered out of nowhere.

Nanatili akong nakasandal sa headboard at nakatingala sa kisame. I lifted my right arm and covered it over my eyes.

"Walang diyos," I whispered again. "Hindi siya totoo."

People are just too delusional and that's the bullsh*t fact.

***

10:13 pm, sabi ng analog clock na naka-display sa pader ng aking kwarto.

Sa gabing iyon, nakatulog ako nang mga ten o'clock. And while I was sleeping on my bed, I suddenly got this weird dream.

A vivid yet very strange dream.

I was running. Extremely running inside a very dark tunnel. I was alone, but at least I am alive and panting hard. I keep running, searching for the end of the tunnel.

But I can't seem to find it.

And behold! A flash of extreme light almost blinded me. No'ng buksan ko ang aking mga mata, isang napakaliwanag na tanglaw ang sumalubong sa'kin.

I stood in the midst of the tunnel's darkness, fascinated to the light that was flashing from the end of this dimmed place.

Literal akong nagtaka. Hindi ko alam kung saan nanggagaling iyung liwanag na nasa dulo ng tunnel... but it's so beautiful. Powerful!

And when the light fainted a little, I saw two figures that are standing by the tunnel's mouth. Those two forms were glowing like a sun, with clouds surrounding them.

One is a lion, the other is a lamb.

_________________________________________

A/N:

Song mentioned above entitled "Holy Is The Lord" by Chris Tomlin.

Enjoy!