Missing Piece

45. Just another "normal" day

  I watched Kylo pilot the TIE, he was rather quiet. In other words, he hadn't said a word.
  Which didn't help with the fact I felt bad for initially trying to walk away from the drama, and let Kylo handle it on his own. And that while he appeared to have come there for me in the first place. But acknowledging that seemed like a bad idea.
  I got up. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have tried to walk away on you, I should have stayed."
Kylo didn't turn his head as he spoke, "I wished I could have done the same, to simply walk away from my problems." A robotic sigh and a side glance in my direction. "But it's fine. You were there when it mattered."
Not for the first time, I hoped that he'd remove his helmet so I could see his emotions.
I placed my hand on his shoulder, a sign that I would be there for him from now on, no matter what.
This time Kylo did look at me, well at my hand on his shoulder to be more precisely. Suddenly the handcuffs popped open, and my wrists were freed.
I retreated my hand to rub my poor, hurt wrists. They probably wished they were part of someone smarter, someone who treated them better and didn't walk into every trap set for them. Frankly, I couldn't disagree.
"Couldn't you have done that earlier?" I teased, trying to take Kylo's mind off his troubles.
"I was distracted, sorry." Even with the helmet changing his voice, I could hear regret.
That man kept surprising me.
I had the impression he needed a friend right now, even though he didn't have many, probably only Matt and me. If I dare put myself on such high regard. 
  I decided to take the risk. I placed one hand on each of his shoulders and gently started to massage them. I waited for a respond, maybe he'd get angry at me, but fortunately he didn't.
  His shoulders were unbelievably tense, so I kept massaging them until they started to relax. Even his head leaned in a little, the back of his helmet rested softly against my chest, enchanted and almost intoxicated by the sense of calm.

  Kylo was his normal self once back on the docks, surrounded by people rushing and running from all directions. Head high, not showing any hint of weakness or exhaustion.
  I stood beside him while I entered the right code to close the TIE. I almost jumped when he, out of the blue, grabbed my wrist and pulled it towards himself.
  Kylo noticed my reaction and acted more gentle now, as he turned my wrist and examined the red and blue bruisings on it. "You're injured," he stated.
  I retreated my hand. "It's nothing. The cuffs were just a little tight, that's all," I protested.
  Kylo looked at my face and shook his head, disapprovingly. "Follow me."

  Kylo opened the doors to his private quarters with a single movement of his hand. "Sit down." He motioned the couch.
  Somehow it didn't sound like an order, even though it seemed like it was meant to be one.
  "I have a healing ointment that will make the bruises and pain go away immediately." Kylo opened a cabin.
Shit, a cabin! What if he opens the one... and sees what's carved inside.
  Luckily Kylo didn't open the cabin. He placed the jar with the ointment on the armrest of the couch and squatted next to me. With his gloved hands he opened the lid and took some ointment on his fingers. "May I?"
  "Well, since you've already messed up your gloves, how could I say no?" I joked.
  "You're imposs-." Kylo hastily cut himself off. Instead he took one of my wrists with his free hand and carefully anointed the medicine on it.
  A shiver went through my spine as his hand and the cold ointment came in contact with my skin.
  Kylo didn't see the flush of red on my cheeks as he was too focused on caring after my wrists.
  I wondered how many people he had helped in his life... God, there's something wrong with me.
  After Kylo was finished, he stood up and went to fetch himself a clean set of gloves.
  On the one side, I wanted to break the silence, but on the other, why would I? It was quite peaceful like this, and silence never escalated into something I was trying to prevent from happening.
  I looked at my wrists as the ointment did its work. The bruises and the pain had vanished, leaving only the greasy ointment behind.
  Kylo came back and gazed at my wrists. "Good. Now we need to remove the ointment. I'll get a clean towel."

  I kept looking at my lap as I waited for Kylo to return with a towel, it was taking rather long now. I turned my head, only to see Kylo staring at something in his cabin. Thé cabin. His hand turn into a fist.
Shit.
  I knew I could just lie, say it wasn't me, but I wasn't able to do so. I got up and placed my hand on his shoulder.
  Kylo turned around with anger and resentment, but immediately calmed down once he realised it was just me.
  I was incredibly thankful for my so called 'ability,' to calm him down. I don't know how many times I would have died without it.
  "I'm sorry Kylo, I regret what I've done. It was a childish prank, I should have know better," I apologised genuinely.
  Kylo's head shot up. "You did this?"
I only nodded, no longer able to look at him. It had been stupid to carve something in his cabin door. I had always considered myself smarter than this.
  "Kylo Ren straight up sucks, huh?" Kylo read out loud.
  I looked up when I heard his teasing tone, almost boyish in fact.
  "I at least assumed you'd come up with something more original. A Head Technician without a sense of creativity, what should we do about that?"
Okay, now he's just playing with me.
I couldn't suppress a grin. "So... you're not going to kill me?"
  Kylo shook his head. "You'll have to come up with something far better than that if you want to be granted such honour."
  Now it was my turn to shake my head in confusion. Kylo Ren really is the most unpredictable person I had ever met.
  "I heard that there's some kind of game night this afternoon. I assume Matt is going to take you there." Kylo closed the cabin door. "I won't hold you up any longer, so you can get some rest and prepare yourself."
  I suppressed a smile when I heard Matt's name. "Of course. And thank you for helping me out... with the bruises." I turned around before I could run my mouth.
Oh what the hell.
  "And for saving me." I finally admitted.

  I was still so deeply in thought about everything that was going on, that I didn't notice the man mopping the hall. I tripled over his bucket.
  He didn't doubt to help me up.
  "I'm so sorry. I should watch where I walk," I apologised. I took the bucket from the floor before more water could spill from it.
  The kind looking man shook his head. "It doesn't matter, I'm kinda used to this." He took his mop and quickly dried the floor before anyone'd slip.
  "That's unfortunate to hear." I held out my hand. "My name is (Y/n), by the way."
  He doubted before taking it. "FN-2187, a janitor as you can see. What do you do?"he asked eagerly. "I'm sorry, I'm not used to having conversations."
  "It's okay," I chuckled lightly. "I'm the Head Technician, nothing too important..." I rambled. "But it must suck, working as a cleaner."
  FN nodded. "It certainly does. I was actually trained to become a stormtrooper, but they had a higher need for cleaners. I think that what I hate the most, is that I'm trained for something I'll probably never get to do."
  I looked at the janitor and imagined him with armour, and a weapon in hands. "You know what, maybe I can do something about that. See it as an apology."
  FN laughed in disbelief. "Thank you for the offer, but how do you plan to do that?"
  I smiled. "Leave that to me."

  I knew her daily routine, I had seen her a couple of times during work.
  I stood quietly in a corner, waiting for her to come out. I didn't have to wait long, I stepped from my hiding place, confronting her.
God I forgot how tall she was.
  Phasma snorted disapprovingly. "(Y/n)."
  I hated the way my name sounded through her chrome helmet.
  "Hey Phas, missed me?"
  Phasma didn't reply, instead she dragged me along, back towards the dark corner. "You scum, what-."
  But I stopped her, bringing my face very close to hers. "Dear Phas, I want to make something very clear. I will no longer let you get away with things like this. I know enough things and people to make you lose your precious position..." I threatened. "... but I want to offer you a way out. I will not sue you for what you did, and we'll leave each other alone. But only if you do this one thing..."
  Phasma was surprised with my sudden attitude. "What thing?"
Got her.
  "Do you know trooper FN-2187?"
  Phasma scoffed. "Of course I do, I know all my-."
  I didn't let her finish. "Good. Now, he's a janitor, but I'd rather see him in the position of an actual stormtrooper. All you have to do, is make that happen. Then we'll never have to see each other again. Deal?" I held out my hand.
  I could feel Phasma's distrust, but that didn't stop her. "Deal."