The love letter and the suicide note

The love letter

My sweet sweet Bear Cub,

I was thinking today about how very much I love you, and how I've never told you. I'm not good with words in person, so I wanted to sit down and write this to let you know how truly in love with you I really am.

I still remember clearly the day that I met you. You were the most beautiful boy I have ever layed eyes on, and when you saw me, and our eyes met for the first time, I could see in your eyes that you were just as in love with me as I was with you. It's okay if you deny it, I denied it for the longest of times, but one day I hope you can be with me.

And here we are, a month after, and you still make me smile like I've never smiled before.

I love the sweet smell of lavender and bergamot as it fills my nose every time you wrap me in your arms. It's my favorite scent now. I don't know what you do, but you always have me smiling and you make me feel so good, in a way that I never knew I could feel.

Whenever you're around it's like all my problems go away, like they're afraid of you and run away when you wrap me in your arms and hold me close.

Your hair is so soft when my fingers run through them, the softest I've ever touched. I love the way it gets in your eyes and the way it annoys you when you have to keep moving it. I love how you say you're going to cut your hair, but never do because you know how much I love it.

Your eyes are the most beautiful distraction I will ever have. The way they sparkle when you have that mischief glint in them when you're about to do something to me. They're beautiful, just like you. Just like the broken parts of you.

You're always beautiful, every side and part of you, and you always will be.

You're my everything, and I know you won't want me to, but I love you. I love you more than anything, and I'll always love you.

I'll always love the twinkle in your eye whenever you talk about something you enjoy. I'll always love your adorable and gleaming smile whenever I manage to get it out of you. I'll always love your adorable and contagious laugh that makes me smile every time I hear it.

I love you, and I will never stop loving you. I will always love you, and I hope you know that. I hope you know just how much I love you because it's SO much. You can't even count to how much I love you.

I love you to the highest number. But there is no highest number, it just keeps going up and up and up, just like my love for you.

I love you with all my heart, and you make me feel emotions I've never felt before. It's scary, but it's also beautiful, and I love it.

I'm in love with you my Bear Cub.  I fell in love with you the moment I saw you. I knew I would fall, I knew that as soon as I saw you, I'd fall and wouldn't ever get back up.

But it's okay because it's you I've fallen for. It's not scary because I have you.

You make me so happy, and I know I said this a lot, but I'm going to say it one more time...

I love you. All of you. Forever and always.

I love you more.

With all my heart,

Star