Untamable (Completed)

Switch.

"What's wrong Kat?" Stark asked me, coming up to my side again. I shoke my head. "Nothing, just thought I seen.." I looked back. "Never mind." I mumbled. "Uh... okay." Ace said, joining my other side. I glanced at him, and back to infront of me. "I could have sworn I sa-" "You're just hungry, and tired. C'mon. Let's get some food in your system, then some sleep." Stark said, cutting off my ramble. I nodded, and started walking home with them by myside. Although I couldn't get the feeling that I was being watched off my chest. Shrugging it off, I continued walking in silence.

We reached the pack house, and stood outside it for several minutes. "Did you wanna go inside?" Ace asked me. I looked at him with sad eyes, nodding slightly. He opened the door for me, and as soon as I stepped in, I was envelpoed in a huge group hug of Rebekah, Cliff, Joel and even Renee. I was smothered, but the nice kind of smothered. When they pulled away, I was yelled at.

"What's the matter with you?"

"Do you know how worried we've been?"

"Ever heard of an invention called THE CELL PHONE."

I tried to smile, but I couldn't. Although I wanted too when I noticed that Elijah wasn't in the room, and neither was Tarmara. Instead, I turned towards Cliff and Joel, and began getting one thing off my chest. "Do you.." I cleared my throat. "Do you have them too?" I asked. They shared a look, then each held out on wrist. On it, was tattooed the same thing, in clear, dark black ink.

Κατερίνα's προστάτης - (Katerina's protector). This time, this time I did smile. I felt whole, safe. "So.. it's official then." I breathed.

Nothing comes between us.

Cliff's voice rang in my head, and I actually jumped back at the suddeness of it. Causing them to laugh and worry all in one.

My bad.

I rang back, and the images of them smiling filled my mind. "Neat necklace!" Joel screetched, snapping me back to reality. I grinned. "Thanks, it's a little rusty, but my brother gave it too me, it's the one he gave me the day mom and dad died." I told him, Cliff, everyone in the room. And I was rewarded with odd/confused looks. "What are you talking about?" Cliff asked. "It looks brand new, no rust?" Joel said, his eyebrow raised. I looked down at the charm, to see it perfectly intact, like it was actually brand new. I gasped lowly and rubbed my thumb over it. "It was rusty.. I don't k-know how it changed." I said glancing up and down between the necklace and them. "I think it's gotten it's color back, because of your special gift." Bekah winked at me. I could tell they were trying to avoid my situation, and I was thankful as heck for that. But then what she said clicked, and I knew she must be right. My gift had made my necklace new again, only this time, it wasn't fake snow that glistened my necklace, it was all real. My necklace was winter itself. I didn't even feel the coldness of it until now, and it made me shiver a bit. But I loved every second.

"How are you feeling?" Renee asked, eyeing my bandages. My mouth formed an 'o' shape, and I unraveled them, showing clear, clean, unscared hands. I shrugged my shoulders. "No-one can see the inside. And that's what's most destroyed." I admitted. Her eyes grew teary, and blazed. A mixure of anger, and heartache. "I'd say 'I can't believe he did that' but it would be Deja vu, because you've gone through this before. I'm so sorry." she said pulling me into her arms, her tears leaking my neck. "Shouldn't I be the one crying?" I teased half-heartedly. I could feel Ace behind me protectively, so I pulled away from her to let him comfort her instead. I yawned, tired out of my mind. But.. I didn't have a room, I had Elijah's room to go to, and I would never recover from this night if I did that. I wanted to cry all over again. "You'll stay in my room with me." Cliff said, reading my thoughts. I nodded weakly, wanting to go up there now. "I think we should get you cleaned up, now. It's long over-do." Joel half smiled to me, and I again, nodded with sad eyes, walking up towards Cliff's room. I heard grunt though, from behind us, when we passed my.. old room. And then I knew. "How far can someone's heart break, before they loose it?" I breathed, my throat closing up, becoming raw all over again.

They both stopped and turned around to face me with worried gazes. "Why do you ask?" Cliff said, his voice soft. I gulped, feeling a lump bigger than ever before. "Because I don't think I have one to break anymore." I sobbed, letting tears fall freely down my cheeks. "Kat, wh-" "I'm freaking out." I sobbed harder, rushing into their arms. "What happened? What made you-" But he was cut off when he heard the grunts. "He isn't..." Joel asked. I shoke my head, tears spilling as I brought my hands up to my face and cried into them. Stepping out of theire arms, I pushed past them both, walking into Cliff's room, and locking myself in the bathroom. I could hear Cliff and Joel banging on it, begging me to come out. But I couldn't, I just sunk to the floor, my back against the bathroom door, my face blank. Things were getting muffled again, the voices, the banging. It was like my insides were sealing, like I was loosing all my senses. I felt weak, and I haven't felt this bad since that day Kol rejected me. I didn't know what to do with myself, I wanted my emotions to freeze solid so I would never have to feel them again. Guilt, pain, heartache. That feeling like you're being stabbed in the stomach, as it churns and churns to the breaking point of your hysteria. I was lost. Lost for everything. Lost for words, lost for thoughts, lost for sounds.

I wanted everything to be over. I shouldn't feel this way, It shouldn't be this way. I got given a second cahnce, and even then I caused everything to go wrong. Elijah was in his bedroom, screwing his true mate. Kol.. well. I didn't know about Kol. He was nice, nicer to me then he'd ever been before. He was really looking up to be a good friend, and thats what I counted him as, my friend. But even still, there wasn't one person who could take this pain away. Not one person... aside from me. All I had to do was turn it off. Like in my favourite TV show 'The Vampire Diaries', us werewolves, like the vampires, have a switch. We can turn off our pain, of suffering. But that just meant I had to turn off all my emotions. Including love, and friendship, and.. just being nice? Did I want that? Was it worth it? To be free of my own gut retching pain, with the cost of not showing anything towards the one's I love, because I just wouldn't think about what I did anymore, to anyone? I didn't know how long I thought about it. Over and over, again and again, the thoughts swirling around in my head like fishes in a pond. And then I decided. I didn't need this, and I was going to get rid of it. I was flipping my switch. I just wouldn't care anymore. No matter who got hurt, as long as it wasn't me.

I felt myself drain again. Only this time, it felt good, I felt better. Actually, I didn't feel. That was the point. A huge weight was lifted off my chest. I liked being this empty. And then a sadistic, real smile smeared across my face.

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