Untamable (Completed)

Nightmare

I walk downstairs, my foots echoing in the emptiness of the pack house. I see Bekah in the kitchen eating an orange. "You almost ready?" She asks through a bite. "My suitcases are in the car, my phone's in my pocket and my purse is in the front seat. I'm good to go." I smile at her and she laughs, handing me a piece of an orange. I'm starving but so nauseas at the same time.
"How're you?" I ask her and she knows I mean Joel. "I'm hurt. Annoyed. Angry. I am a whole lot of negative words and yet I am still in love with the man." She frowns at me. I sign. "I wish I could say it gets easier but it won't, unless he's with you I mean." I tell her and she hands me another piece of orange.
"The love I still feel for Kol is addictive and it kills me every time he's with another woman psychically." I add. Maybe that's another reason why I'm so scared of going back there. Because it won't be the same. He will no longer be far away whilst I feel physical pain of it all. I'll see him and hear him, too. I'm being forced to, thanks to our move.
I look at my best friend, a furrow between her brows as she frowns so deeply. Oh, Bek.
She looks up at me now, no part of her was hiding her pain.
"It's getting harder to resist him. My wolf is in hiding, she feels like he's rejected us, even when she knows he's only oblivious at the moment. It feels as if she's more hurt than I am." She takes a deep breath and tries to give me a smile as I grab her hand and squeeze. "He will figure it out. We don't know when and I know that's a big part of what's hurting you. Try to remember though, he is your mate. And he will realize some day that you're his." I tell her and she smiles.
She changes topics.
"Do you think you're gonna be okay, with this whole move?" Bekah asks and I half smile. "I don't even fucking know anymore." I reply and she raises her eyebrows. "Something you wanna tell me?" She says and I laugh. "There is so damn much I wanna tell you." I say and she laughs now. She tosses the orange scraps into the compost and turns back to face me.
"Begin." She tells me and I sigh.

"I had a nightmare last night that confused me enough that I had to talk to Elijahs parents. I left the office even more confused," I grumble and she laughs. "What is going on?" And I sign yet again, explaining the next steps I've been told to take. That I am meant to go somewhere quiet and alone so I can focus entirely on a painful memory that is supposedly going to show me the gift that I have had since birth, a gift I am told needs to discovered for things to fall into place.

"Holy shit." She whispers stepping closer to me. "Yeah." I say, lost for anymore words. Rebekah takes a moment to think before smiling at me. "Okay, first things first. We'll need to find someone we can both go." And I frown. "We'll never get the privacy we need, we're going to be on the road in less than an hour." I say, remembering that I'll be seeing my old pack, my emotionally abusive brother, my verbally abusive mate and my physically abusive old pack, today. Soon. I sigh for the billionth time. I won't bother to go on a rant right now. It's going to be a really long car ride. "Don't worry. Once we get this thing figured out, you'll feel more powerful than ever." Bek tells me and I smile at her. She would know. I nod agreement. "Let's do this." I say for the second time today.
We walk outside of the pack house, seeing cars lined up in front. Everything was packed away into our moving trucks and the car's were loaded up seperately with all our individual bags and such. "Okay, we'll be riding with Elijah in the Jeep and Cliff will be driving with Joel and Tamara.

"How are thing's with you and Elijah?" She asks as we wait by Elijah's car for him. We were just about ready to go. Everyone was loading into their cars with their familes and boxes of stuff. Elijah would be the last to leave the house, same with Cliff an dJoel, who Tamara was waiting on in Cliff's Hummer. I look at Bekah. "Heated. He's so sweet.. and tempting." I say grinning, only to frown in a split second. "I can't ignore the thought of him finding his mate though." I say sadly.

"Don't ruin this for yourself." She whines. "I don't want to. I'm not trying to." I reply and let out a deep breath. "We've admitted we love each other. But Elijah will no longer love me entirely when he finds her. All feelings for any other human or wolf will be less strong, less evident." I frown.
"No more sadness, that's enough for today," she states and I laugh. "I really don't think this is the last of moments of sadness today." She stops as we reach the cars and glares at me. "Then turn that sadness into rage, burry the rage down and hold onto it some where deep inside you until we can find somewhere we can discover just how strong you are." Her voice kinda scared me. I nod at her. Shit. I had forgotten about my unknown gift. "Okay. I'll give it a shot." I tell her with a smile. She comes to stand beside me as we lean on Elijah's car. She bumps my shoulder, "It will all work out. Just like you told me it will. We'll do this together, worrying will only give you wrinkles." She tells me, chin up in sass. I laugh and hug her arm tight. "C'mon everyone, time to head out." I turn around and see Elijah stepping down the porch steps. He smiles at me and I grin back. I shouldn't over-think this. Rebekah steps away and climbs into the car. Elijah steps in front of me, kissing me quick and then quick again. He walks to the drivers side, climbs in and I do the same in the passengers seat. We all snap our seatbelts and I frown, hearing him start the car. I turn and watched in sadness as we drive away from the only life I've ever loved.

~~ A day later ~~

**Contains some swear words**

About three quarters into the drive, I pull down the mirror above me and reach into my purse at my feet, grabbing out my make-up bag. I slept for the first bit, thankfully and now, I was fixing a few things in my appearance.
I apply some cover-up, add a bit of mascara and lastly a neutral tone of lipstick. Rebekah was snoring softly in the back and I turn in my seat, smiling at her. She had already done her makeup this morning, of course. I had a flawless best friend. I turn back and give myself one last look before I pop the mirror back up and place my make-up bag back into my purse.
I look over at Elijah, he looked handsome driving. I see him smirk but he doesn't look my way. "Like what you see?" He asks me and I laugh nervously. "I do, yes." I reply and he lets out a laugh of his own. "I'm happy to hear it." I We start talking, subject after subject. I ask him about his favourite part about being an alpha and his biggest goal in life. He asks what my favourite book was and how close I am with my wolf. It's not until my heart beats quickens that I look out the window. Shit.
"Babe..." Elijah says and I mumble an "I know."
I have to keep calm. "Rebekah," I out and turn to shake her leg. She wakes up, takes a look around and after a moment, she glares out the window. She fixes her hair and pushes her lashes up a bit with her finger.
I turn and watch in silence as we pull into the all too familiar gravel driveway. We slowly reach the front and I see the Fallen Moon pack house, only a few metres away. My wolf lets out a whimper and my sadness starts to rise in me.
This is really happening, it's really them. I glare out the window, my sadness turning into anger. Push it down, I tell myself. I close my eyes and take a deep breath as we park. I look at my boyfriend and then to my best friend. Both of them nod and me and I nod in return, opening my door and stepping out of the Jeep.
Elijah comes around to meet me, grabbing my hand. I smile and peck his lips. He pulls me into his side and kisses my forehead. I wrap my arms around his waist and sigh in relief. "You're always so warm." I cuddle into his chest. "Why, thank you." He tells me and I laugh. "Are you ready?" Rebekah asks, coming up behind me. "Nope." I smile at her.

Elijah pulls me tighter against him and smiles into my neck this time. "I've got you." He tells me and I take a deep breath. How am I supposed to do this? My knees feel weak. I really don't want to be here. A few other cars pull up around us, then the moving trucks. They're all stepping out of their cars, grabbing a some of their bags. I get waves from my friends and smiles from them too. I turn to look at the house in front of me and they all come to stand beside me.
Soon, my whole family was surrounding the home of my worst nightmares.

We knock. The regulars such as Cliff and Joel, Tamara and Elijah and of course, Bekah and I, were all standing infront of the doors to The Fallen Moon pack house. We were waiting for them to answer my hands started shaking. I felt cold. I clench my fists, holding back a glare. How could I be back here? "Just stay calm babe, we wont let them hurt you." Elijah mutters and I hold tighter onto his hand. I find myself thinking that I won't need anyone's protection if I don't get this anger under control. Just then, the door opens and Renee was standing in front of me. "Oh crap," I mutter.
She's going to kill me... She smiles at everyone, greeting them and gesturing is inside. I hid my face in Elijah's jacket. We moved closer to the back of the group. "Welcome everyone, my name is Renee and this is the Fallen Moon pack house." She stands in front of us and I frown. I've missed her. She looks different, more mature. Beautiful as always. They must have gotten her to get the door while they prepare the pack meeting room.
I take a look around my surroundings best I can being hidden in Elijahs shirt.
It looked the same and almost felt the same. Almost. The angry part of me I keep trying to shove away knows that we are stronger than this place and what it holds. I didn't feel the same fear I thought I would feel. I clench my fists again, fuck I am freezing. I listen as Elijah speaks.
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