beetle | unedited ✔️

nine

Parker Elise Leon

It was time for me to roam around the school again. Lunch time, my favorite hour of the school day.

I saw his figure leaning against a locker and immediately turned around. Nope, not talking to you until our class. "Hey, beetle!" I heard his voice but continued to walk. Who is he calling beetle? "Wait up, will you?" He caught up to me and fell into step beside me. "Beetle?" I question, keeping my gaze ahead of me.

"Yeah, because of your car." I saw him stuff his hands into his sweatshirt pocket in my peripheral vision. I nod silently, coming to a stop at the vending machine again. He stopped, leaning against the wall so he could watch me. I got my orange soda and quickly turned to walk away.

"What is up with you?" He ran and stood in front of me, blocking me from walking any further. I sighed with a shrug. "Nothing, I'm just not in the mood to talk to anyone." His gaze locked and his face turned cold. What did I do? Nothing I said was bad. "Fine." He stepped aside and walked away from me. Okay, weirdo.

I shook my head as I started walking again. Class with him is not going to be fun, I can tell you that much.

As I suspected, Gabe didn't talk to me at all. In fact he scooted as far away from me as possible and kept his earbuds in. Of course it didn't bother me because I was the one who said I didn't want to talk to anyone today, but he didn't need to be an bootyhole about it.

Anyways, now I wait in my car as I scroll through my depression playlist. I didn't like to cry but I knew I just had to let it out and what better way to do it? I queued a bunch of songs that I wanted to listen to and started pulling out of the spot. I saw Gabe wave me over and grumbled. He's not going to let me listen to my dad music if I drive him home.

"Hey, did you need a ride home?" He shook his head. "I don't need one, but I want one." I tipped my head to my passenger seat and he silently got in with an emotionless expression. What an odd boy. Hopefully what's her face doesn't see me driving him home. I think I'd die from her death glare alone.

My depressed music kept going and tears threatened to spill out of my eyes. I could tell he was watching my every move but I didn't dare look at him. I pulled up to his driveway and waited for him to get out but he didn't. "Are you okay?" His voice was soft, just like when he told me about my smile the other day.

"It shouldn't concern you." My voice broke a little bit as I turned away from him. You're being so stupid and lame, stop crying. "Hey, it does concern me. What's wrong?" He took my wrist in his hand and pulled me so that I was facing him. "I'm sad, okay. I don't want to talk about it." He sighed as he sat facing me as well.

"When you're ready to talk about it, I'll be here. We're friends now, friends comfort their friends." I snorted as he spoke inspirationally. Friends, huh? If only the hot hunk before me thought more than that of me. "Thank you, Gabriel." He slowly got out of my car before going up and unlocking his door. I waited for him to get inside before driving off and going home.

My parents left before I could even wake up this morning, so I didn't get to say goodbye, again. It hurt to know that they didn't want to be around me; that they'd rather be at something for work than with their own daughter.

Of course I didn't think much about it when I was little, but looking back on those years I always felt so horrible. I saw them more than I do now, sure, but that doesn't mean I saw them a lot. It was just my grandma and I before she passed away. My grandpa as well but he passed a lot sooner than she did. She was basically my mother, which left me broken after her death. I loved her more than anything, and I still do, but it's been four years since then. I wished she was still here but I knew that she is in a better place and that will always be with me in spirit. My naive little eighth grade self didn't think anything of it. I always thought being hurt my your parents was a normal, everyday thing.

I met Mari my freshman year of high school. Before then, I thought everyone's parents left on business trips for long periods of time; I thought that I was living a normal life. When Christmas of freshman year came around, I realized everyone received gifts from their parents and family members. I didn't get anything from mine except a short phone call that consisted of 'Merry Christmas, we can't make it home, we're sorry but it's for work.'

After that, I began to watch as my parents came home less and less and left more and more. They became so much more distant with me. They'd go on extravagant 'business' trips without me, thinking I'm still the same, dense middle schooler; and I'm pretty sure that's still the case. If I was still my middle school self, I wouldn't even think twice about any of this.

At the same time I love that I am as smart as I am, I also wish I could go back in time; maybe make them stay home more often. It was too late by the time I finally realized what was really going on. The worst part is that I don't even think they remember my birthday. Tragic, really, but I've gotten over this before so I can do it again.