84. Special chapter: I thought we could be more...

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Jisoo started her morning as always, she was never late, she was never early, for her the most important thing was to be on time, the right time, she always hated people that came earlier than expected, at school they would name her human clock, because she was always on time.

I grew up without any sibling and boy it was hard because I really felt alone, specially when Jennie wasn't in Seoul, my mum was always at work but once in a while we would skip school and work just to get breakfast and go to the zoo or any other place I wanted to visit, those are the moments I loved the most, I still treasure them, since my parents got divorced many things changed and this was one of the things I liked the most, see my mum feel happy and free, even if she worked a lot.

I spent my life between business meetings, school, and playing around in the entertainment branch, full of actors, actresses and Idols, I was a popular kid, of course people wanted to be my friend, just because I could hang out with important people.

When Jennie left to study abroad I felt like the half of my heart left as well, we were really close, but since the moment Jennie lost her father my little cousin changed a lot, she stopped smiling, she turned out more serious, she was worried for her mum all the time, and my aunt was a crying mess.

At first I thought this would be just for a couple of months, but months turned to years and for a moment after Jennie graduated from her university in London I really thought the stubborn Jennie would never come back, she actually planned to work in the States, I had many friends but I wasn't close to other cousins or my own brothers since they lived abroad as well, we were like strangers and I only used to see them once a year or even less, that's why I didn't like the idea of Sehun visiting Seoul, at first it was really weird, then he said he would study for a while over here, but I rarely talked to him since he was always busy.

As I said I used to be a popular kid at school, I promised to my self to be surrounded by people to feel less lonely, I was always friendly and open, I really liked to ace all the subjects at school, I didn't want people to think my last name was the reason I was getting good grades, at home I was most likely lonely, except every summer when my fave cousin and almost sister would come back, she kept the cold aura but she always acted natural around me, we always ended up talking till really late at night, and when she had to come back to her school we would talk on the phone for hours, specially when we weren't busy.

When I was growing up, I kinda discovered I felt attracted to boys and girls, my mum knew about it and didn't care "Chu, you should be able to like or love whoever you want, just make sure that person respects you, don't let anybody try to take advantage of you" she told me when I decided to tell her, and I couldn't get happier, my mum always accepted me and never judged me, she was really strict though, but I know she just wanted to protect me and make me a hard worker.

Everyone knew I was a Kim, and that was one of the reasons why many people wanted a date me, I usually didn't really care, if I liked the person I would get them a chance, that was till I suffered my first heartbreak, I was really in love but this person only cared about get attention from people and all my family could provide, after cry my heart out for days I promised myself that I wouldn't be vulnerable again and I would never let anybody hurt me again or take advantage of me, maybe that's why I didn't let anybody gain my heart easily.

I found a great satisfaction in my studies, specially financial courses, they were my favourite and with time, study and training I was ready to get a position as a CEO, it was really hard, this position needed someone really strict, determinated, a good leader and smart.

When I was younger I thought I could be in the entertainment industry, it was something that passionate me and it was just really fun, I would get any role on my school plays, I really enjoyed singing and I'm not trying to brag guys but I was actually really good at singing, I took lessons for both things, but that world seemed to vain for me, because it was surrounded of many vain people, I didn't have the energy to deal with so many fake people and I decided to pursue my university career instead the entertainment, my mum told me she just wanted me to be happy, and I did what was the best for me.

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