Into the universe of EROS

Chapter 19

*Ajax*

I opened my eyes and almost instantly my eyes was assaulted by bright light. My head was throbbing and my throat was dry. My memory of what had happened was hazy but I remembered enough.

I looked to my side and seen a sleeping Reese sitting in a chair perched at my bedside. We were in the Salem infirmary. I blew up my only chance to see Eros. After what just happened theres no way my parents will ever let me go out unsupervised again. Fuck.

I tried to sit up but my body was in far too much pain. I just turned to look at the glass doors and I watched as the nurses and doctors zoomed pass, busy going about their day.

I just lay there ,thinking. Why wasn't I strong enough? Will I ever see him again?

My thoughts were interrupted by my mother's voice as she walked in on the phone, droning on about how well Salem was doing.

I locked eyes with her and she gave me a look that I couldn't quite decipher. I didn't know what to expect.

After a while she finally finished her phone call and turned to look at me.

"What have you done Ajax? Why have you done this to yourself and to our home?" she asked her voice lined with what sounded to be concern. "If you needed something why did you not come to me? Have I ever turned you away in your time of need?" she said looking at me as though she was waiting for me to say something that would make her feel at ease. I wanted to respond, I thought hard about what I would say but in this exact moment I went completely blank, unable to form a simple sentence.
She looked down at her hands and for the first time ever I seen a tear leave her eyes. The sight alone broke my heart in ways I didn't think was possible.

I reached out for her hand and she took mines in hers.

"Pease Ajax, I beg of you. Tell me what is going on with you" she asked so soft it was barely a whisper.

I looked up at her and I could feel my eyes welling up. "I've just been trying to find myself and I..."

" But we all know who you are and we love who you are. Why are you trying to change?" she cut in.

" No mother, that is the furthest thing from the truth." I responded.

She sighed as she squeezed my hand," so tell me the truth Ajax, tell me who you are?"

I took a deep breathe as I tried to build up the courage to tell her the whole truth and just before I spoke I felt a surge of doubt and fear.

"I just feel like everyone expects me to be someone and I don't know how to be that person." I said with a huge exhale. Even though I didn't tell her everything, I told her a piece of the truth and right now for me that was good enough.

She shifted closer to me and took my cheeks in her hands before saying, "the only person I expect you to be is yourself Ajax. I want you to be my son, the child I raised and I want you to be the best version of that." she said with a warm smile.

Her words instantly shattered all hopes of me holding back my tears because they came gushing out faster than water out of a hole in a dam. She pulled me in for a hug. I have never felt as close to my mother as I did right now.

After some much needed crying we released each other and she got up to leave. As queen there was always a fire she had to put out somewhere.

Just before she left she stopped at the door and turned to me chuckling, "Thank god this is resolved. For a moment there I thought it might be something worse, like you were gonna tell me you like men or something." I froze at her words as I processed them. "That would've killed me" she finally said as she walked away, still chuckling.

I felt a deep pain ring out from my chest and bounce off every part of my body. It was as if my soul felt the weight and pain of her words.

I turned to face the wall where a still sleeping Reese lay snoring and I cried into my pillow. I felt my howls vibrate the bed as I whimpered ,trying to be as quiet as possible and I felt my chest getting heavier and heavier till I blacked out yet again , only this time I was lost in the darkness of my own mind.

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Hey readers I know its been a very long time and I apologise but things got really hectic. Despite the long wait I hope you guys enjoy. Thank u