CURSED [D.M]

-(55) you're my gem

ZILLIAH doesn't want to go back to Hogwarts without Draco. But she also doesn't want to remain trapped in that apartment with her mother any longer.

Daphne used to leave in the mornings though. And she'd only come back by nightfall. Zilliah never asked her where she went. Daphne never told her about it either. They lived like total strangers under that roof. Daphne had tried to be cordial and failed, so she just plainly ignored Zilliah's existence.

But one night, thinking Zilliah was asleep, Daphne had let herself into the room and sat beside her, stroking her hair, caressing her cheeks. It made Zilliah angry- very angry. But more than that, her heart ached at it. At how her mother had only allowed herself to be affectionate with her own child when she thought she wasn't conscious. Daphne had kissed her forehead and tucked her into the blanket properly before leaving. Zilliah would've thought it all to be a dream if she hadn't stayed up the whole night, crying into her pillow.

Except the occasional conflicts, nothing much happened between them. It was silent mostly. But sometimes the silence is also too draining. So she had chosen to be back at Hogwarts, not entirely because of what Snape had said when he saw her at the Malfoy Manor. But because she needed an escape from there. And there's nowhere else she could escape to.

She stares at the ceiling of her dorm, the moonlight casting a faint but gentle glow inside it. And she should feel peaceful. She really should. But Millicent's snores ring in her ears and it gets her so annoyed. But what annoys her more is Pansy's bed being vacant.

No, she hadn't returned to Hogwarts. Neither had Theo. And they had given no reason as to why they aren't here. They were unreachable.

She had kept up hope for the past one week she's been here. She had kept asking Blaise if there was any information on them. But Blaise just shrugged and went on his way, his demeanor absolutely broken.

She has finally given up. She now knows they aren't coming back. She now knows that nothing will be the same anymore.

It's harsh, yes. But that's how you know it's reality.

And her ever favorite escape from reality? Books.

She picks up her paperback and casts lumos, immersing herself completely into the book before her.

"The flame in her was slow and deep-he was going to incite it with the fire in himself; he was going to make a blaze to burn down cities, to lay waste cathedrals and castles and plain meetinghouses-to make a world where it was only him, and only her, and this bed, and one flesh."

-

Zilliah was dressing up to get to her first class of the day when there's a loud bang at the door. Millicent had already left for breakfast at the Great Hall and it was just Zilliah in that dorm. Not wanting to face anyone who was behind it, Zilliah chooses to ignore the sound and gets on with tying her hair up into a ponytail.

A few minutes pass and she had almost forgotten about the noise. But then a resounding crack fills the air and in walks Daphne, having destroyed the lock.

Flames light up inside Zilliah's stomach. "What are you doing here?!"

"I just needed to talk with you", Daphne says, her voice low. She casts a quick silencing spell and takes off the hood of the coat she's wearing. "Please."

Zilliah has no energy left in her to deal with this right now. But the pleading look in her mother's eyes makes her cave. "Fine, you can have five minutes."

She's expecting some order or some more restrictions to curtail her freedom more. "I'm sorry", says Daphne, completely shocking Zilliah.

"Come again?", she says, not sure she heard it right.

"I said I'm sorry, Zilliah", her mother's voice turns soft, the softest she has ever heard it. "I know nothing can excuse my absence. Nothing can ever make me treating you like shit okay. Ever. I do know that. But know that I did what I had to do, not what I wanted to. And what I wanted to was to be with you. I know I didn't make it seem so when you stayed with me these past months. And I'm so so sorry for that. But I love you, my darling ", her voice cracks as she steps forward, raising her hand to caress Zilliah's cheeks.

Zilliah flinches at it and steps back, not allowing herself to be deceived by these meaningful words.

"I know you don't believe me", Daphne lowers her hand and sighs. "But you will. You will understand why I did what I did. Not me hitting you and all the abusive words- never that. But why I had to stay away."

Zilliah can't bear with this conversation anymore. "Please leave, Daphne."

"Yes, yes", she says, "I am leaving. I can't stay long or I'll be seen. But I wanted you to know, my love, that you're my everything. You always have been. Right from when you were born."

There are tears in Daphne's eyes and Zilliah can feel her own eyes tearing up. "Stop", she pleads. "Please stop."

Daphne nods and turns back to leave, pain written all across her face, but then she spins around and mumbles, "Just- one more thing."

"No, I don't-"

"Zilliah, please", her voice is weak, shattered, bruised. She reaches into her bag and pulls out a small empty flask. She mutters a spell and Zilliah almost makes to take cover thinking her mother is about to do something to her. But Daphne directs the spell at her own self, a white wave of magic being transferred from her fingertips to her head, and from her head to the flask, filling it up.

Once done, she closes the lid and hands it to Zilliah. She takes it with slight hesitation and utmost curiosity.

Daphne smiles through her tears and comes forward to hug her. And Zilliah should push her away. She should tell her to be damned. But she stands there stiff and unmoving, and lets her mother hold her, breathe her, for at least a few while.

She doesn't know why she does it. Only that she should.

"You're my gem", Zilliah", Daphne whispers into her ear. "Take this to the pensieve in the Headmaster's room. And you'll see that you truly are my gem. The rarest. The loveliest."