Fragile

40. Love

Fox's pov

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A month later - (June)

"Why is there a B on your report card?" An angry voice echoes through the air.

"I'm sorry mom but Liv has really needed support from me and I-" I start but my mom gives no fuck about my reasons.

"Do I look like I care?" She spits out and grabs my wrist forcefully, my heart rate speeding up immediately. "This girl has made you drop your grades for what dumb reason she has? That is not acceptable."

Everything is so much, sometimes I can't handle it. Those nights when nobody sees I drink myself away from my problems and forget everything, just for a moment it all disappears and I get peace.

Not that I don't want to help Livia. I do, I really do but it gets so overwhelming. I'm still worried sick, taking care 24/7 that Liv doesn't fall back to her old habits, and at the same time I should be getting straight A's and never miss a day of school?

My three full vodka bottles are hiding under my bed, waiting for me to gulp them down. And I will as soon as I check on Livia today.

August says taking care of Livia shouldn't be my responsibility, and so does Liv herself. But, really, who else is there for her? That's the problem. I can't lose her, she's the most precious and important thing in my whole life. I've never felt anything like this for anyone. It's love.

I never learned properly to love, because nobody showed it to me. And this, my first love, I can't let go. I can't let go of her, not even if it hurts and makes my life a hundred times harder. I don't care.

At least Liv doesn't know about the slaps that I got for being absent from school enough.

"I'm sorry." I whisper to my mom who gleams at me.

"You better be." She spits out and releases my wrist. There's visible red marks left right where her nails dig into my skin.

I just want some peace. My stress levels were so high that I couldn't sleep anymore. Or I could fall asleep, but every night I'd wake up at least two times gasping for air and almost scream out loud from my nightmares.

"I'm going out tonight." I tell my mom. Well, not actually out, but she wouldn't probably be happy about me spending every possible minute I could with Liv.

"Go, I can't stand to see your face right now." She says and turns on her blood red heels to walk away.

I was so used to her stinging words at this point that it didn't even hurt much to hear that. Without having time to worry about it, I head outside to the summer air. Finally there wasn't school to stress about and I could just concentrate on the actual important stuff.

***

I knock four times on the door before someone comes to open it. "Hey beautiful." I greet Livia and give her flushed cheek a kiss.

"You keep calling me that." She smirks.

"For a good reason." I tell her. She looked much better nowadays, cheeks full of colour and eyes not glassy anymore.

"I have a present for you." She says suddenly and I tilt my head in surprise.

"Why?" We had only planned on eating together and maybe watching a movie.

She just shrugs, taking my hand in her warm one and leading me inside, "Come on. It's in my room."

In the last month, we've hang out almost every single day at her house and to be honest, this house feels a lot more like home to me than where I actually live.