Invisibly Masked

Chapter 29: Part 2

Play the song above and have this playing in the background (rainymood.com), I feel it makes the chapter better. :')

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I woke up to rain. A storm raging outside clawed at the windows in the room, the moonlight dodgy and broken up as the shadows of trees danced. I rolled over, yawning a little, but paused when I realized that I didn't hit another body. I felt the bed, Jessie's form not next to me. I sat up a bit, holding myself up with my elbows, opening my eyes a little. It was dark in the bedroom except for the little light the moon gave, but it flashed over a head and shoulders sitting beside the bed. Well... That's not creepy at all.

My heart raced as my still half asleep brain dreamt, and the figure turned the dream into a nightmare. I moved a little and sat up more, pulling myself over towards him.

"Jessie?" I said softly, putting a hand on his shoulder. He looked up at me like he was startled, and I figured he was deep in thought. His eyes clouded over and he touched my hand with his, looking away from me. His shoulders were slumped and from what I could see he was tired. He probably didn't sleep at all. I looked at the bedside clock and saw that it was close to three in the morning.

"Jessie, why aren't you sleeping?" I asked, my voice weaved with sleep. He groaned and picked up a bottle by his feet, taking a huge gulp of it. I gasped, pulling his hand away from him.

"Why are you drinking? Where did you even get this?" I exclaimed, hopping off the bed and kneeling beside him, pulling the bottle out of his grip. He groaned, trying, and failing, to resist me.

"Jack makes the pain go away," he mumbled. I sighed, feeling his forehead. I sucked my teeth and put my hands in my lap. He was drunk and mourning...

"Come back to bed, Poobear," I said softly, using his nickname to try and coax him. He smiled a little and shrugged, or what I think was a shrug. Looked more like a body jolt.

"I remember when she was born," he said, his voice hoarse. I inhaled sharply, feeling my body tingle. Oh god, Jessie....

"My mom was so happy. I was too. I felt like she was a new beginning. Also I felt it was like a fuck you to my sperm donor. 'Fuck you, we've got a new family, too,'" he said, his voice coarse with Jack Daniels. I looked down at my lap, willing myself not to cry. I had to be strong for him right now. He needed this. Jessie chuckled humorlessly.

"Then, when she was diagnosed... It was like that new world we created shattered. The doctors said that the treatment would prolong her life, but there was no guarantee she would fully heal. The chances of her beating it were slim to none," he ran his hands down his face, his hair a mess. I let him continue, scooting closer to him. I needed to listen.

"I've been preparing for this her entire life. For her death. Is that sick? She's not even gone yet and I'm already failing at being strong. I was supposed to be strong. I don't even think I can be strong for myself, let alone my mother. Oh god," his voice cracked, the sound of how broken he truly was bringing tears to my eyes.

"I don't think my mom can survive this...." He said, looking at his hands. I leaned forward and placed my hands in his, his fingers instantly gripping mine like I was a lifeline. There was a silence, the only sound being the storm outside.

"Please say something...." He pleaded, looking up at me. I opened my mouth, not knowing what to say. I bit my lip.

"Tell me about her childhood. The good parts, not in the hospital," I asked, sitting on my butt next to him. He nodded, letting me lean my head on his shoulder. He sniffed, playing with my fingers.

"One time, when she was two, we went to the park in the fall. Holly had just gotten new boots and she was so proud of them. The leaves were just turning red, the colors burned into my brain. What made it amazing was that my mother told her she wasn't aloud to go, but after she cried for three hours I got her dressed and we snuck out my window," he said, looking up at the window across from us. "I got in so much trouble, but it was worth it. I used the tree to climb down and told her to jump. That I would catch her. And I did," he chuckled to himself, entwining and untwining our fingers.

"She wanted to go on the swings, and I pushed her on them. She wanted to feel older, like me, so she asked to swing on the big kid swing. I let her, but I didn't push her too high. We played all day, and it was the best day of my life. Just Holly and me. Having fun," he said. I felt a drop on my cheek, but I didn't look up. I let him continue, hearing his voice change.

"There was a point in the day when the sun started to set. She was at the top of the jungle gym, and she was too afraid to slide down the fireman's pole. I told her I'd catch her. I'd always catch her. I was her big brother; I was supposed to protect her, whether it be from heights or from teenage boys, I-" he choked, a sob coming out instead of words. I held my breath, closing my eyes. Jessie's body wracked with spasms, his tears staining my sweater. My hands flew up to hold his head as he fell more into me, crying. I bit my cheek, feeling a single tear run down my face. He broke...in my arms, completely.

"Shhhh," I cooed, running my fingers through his hair as I held him by his shoulders, hugging him as he cried for his sister. His cries turned to screams of agony, and I bit my cheek so hard I tasted copper. His entire body shook, all that he was feeling, all the emotions he's held in just to be strong, they were all bursting out of him. I laid my forehead onto his head, slowly rocking as I shushed him just as he shushed me. I stayed strong for him for a change, letting him be weak for once.

His cries died down, yet he still laid on me. I ran my fingers through his hair, rubbing his back with my other hand. He was in my lap now, his breathing slow. I tapped him and moved his hair out of his eyes.

"Jessie... Lets get in the bed, okay? My legs are falling asleep," I said, standing up as he moved. I sat on my knees onto he bed and helped him up, but instead of laying on the pillow he pulled me down and wrapped his arms around my waist, shoving his face into my stomach. I gasped and held my breath, not wanting to move.

"You can breath, Kitten. I just... I just need this, please," he asked, tightening his hold. I relaxed and grabbed a pillow, sighing. I looked down at him and ran my fingers through his hair, my eyes meeting his as he looked up.

"Everything's going to be okay, Jessie. Maybe not right now, maybe not later. But soon... I promise," I said, wiping his cheeks with my sleeve. He stared at me for a while, his green eyes staring so intently that I felt he could see into my soul.

"Thank you, Kitten," he whispered, snuggling back into my abdomen. I smiled to myself, snuggling into my pillow, letting the rain sing me to sleep.

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A/N: Not the last part, btw!!!

-Kemma