A Gun and a Rose (A Harry Styles Fan Fiction)

Chapter 1.

I’m screaming so loud but no one can hear me and I’ve got blood in my hands but I don’t know why and I feel pain but I don’t know where.  I’ve drown myself in a sea of sorrow and I just can’t breathe. I don’t want to breath, is too painful.

-          Rose, open your eyes Rose. Everything is ok, see? You’re safe.

I do as he says and I open my eyes. Still that feeling of mistrust keeps haunting me, I’m always alert now I mean, you never know.

-          You’re ok, see? – he grabs my hand and shows it to me. It’s clean.

-          I’m sorry doctor, it’s just… - I sigh – I haven’t slept in 3 days, I’m really tired and it’s always the same dream. Never less nor more, it doesn’t really helps me to remember.

He seems disappointed and I feel even more terrible than I look like, I have huge dark circles around my eyes, there are still some pretty bad scars in my face, especially in my neck (that’s why my mum made me use this awful scarf even though it’s April), and I didn’t really have much trouble choosing my outfit.

-          It’s ok, really. Have you been writing in your dream journal? You know, every little detail is important. – he says for what it feels like the 100th time.

-          Yes, I have. Trust me, what I remember at 3am it’s the same as what it is at 3pm. Actually, I’ve made it not only my dream journal as well as my diary. I guess it helps keeping the sanity a little better.

-          Very good. – he takes off his glasses and puts them in his lap – Have you visited Harry already?

I wide my eyes a little, it took me a little off guard and makes me uncomfortable.

-          No… no I haven’t. I’m not sure hmm… If his family wants me to. I think I’ll wait a little longer. – I say looking at my hands.

He nods and writes something in his papers. I don’t want to be here anymore, I want to go home and lock myself in my room… or maybe go to that lake Harry and I went on last month, so much has changed.

-          Oh you can go now, the session is over. – he suddenly says has if he had forgotten I was there.

I get up and start to walk towards the door when he says: And please tell your mother to come in, I would like to speak to her. – he says not taking his eyes off his papers.

I do so and I get out of that little room that never really does what a psychiatry office should do – calm someone down. My mum gets up from one of the chairs of the waiting room.

-          He says he wants to talk to you. – I tell her.

-          Very well, wait here I’ll be right back. – she says while passing trough me but I stop her, grabbing her arm.

-          Actually, - I start – I was thinking maybe going on a little walk.

-          Ok, I’ll be out in a minute and we’ll go.

-          No mum, just me. I just want to be alone for a little while.

She doesn’t like the idea and I really can understand her, if I were her I would have locked me in a dungeon, but as she starts to speak, I say:

-          Please mum, I need it.

She looks me in the eyes, she looks tired, and she nods.

-          Be back home in one hour.

I grab her hand and smile kindly: Thank you.

I leave her alone and I get out of the building. I won’t be walking around; I know exactly where I want to go, I’m going to see him.

That's it! That's the 1st chapter, I really hope you guys liked it. Please vote and comment xoxo.