Last Friday Night

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"Magnus, I'm wet."

"Hah. For a second I thought you said you were wet."

"I did. And I am. Magnus, there's something wet on me. Get up."

"Wait. Did we.....last night?"

"I won't know until you get off me."

Magnus moved. His vision was blurry and his joints didn't exactly move when he wanted them to, but he somehow managed to roll off the bed and into the floor. Something let out a 'moo' as he collapsed to the floor.

"Alec, was that you?" He groaned.

"We've been together for a year, Magnus. Not once have I ever mooed at any point during our relationship."

"Good point. You up?"

"I am now-what the hell do you have on?"

Magnus looked down at himself. He was dressed in a glittery cow costume from head to toe. When he squeezed one of the udders, it let out a moo sound. "Oh. That explains it. Why are you covered in sticky stuff?"

Alec looked down at his own body, bare all except for a pair of boxer briefs. "I have no idea. It smells nice though."

Magnus reached over and touched some of the liquid with a finger. He sniffed it, then tasted it. "Huh. Strawberry yogurt."

"Ew! Why would you even taste it? That could've been anything on my body!" Alec gagged and shuddered. "What the hell even happened last night?"

Magnus looked around the room. They were both in his apartment which was a complete wreck from the looks of it. "I think we partied hard last night, Alexander."

"Partied hard? With who? There's no one here," Alec tripped over a pizza box on the way over to the bathroom door. "Where the hell did the yogurt even come from?! Who parties with yogurt?!"

Magnus laughed. "It's a party, Alec. No one ever knows what they're partying with. They make stuff up as they go." He flicked one of the udders with a finger. "Really digging this costume though. No idea where it came from but I love it all the same."

Alec groaned at the thought of having to clean this mess up. "Do you have your phone there with you? Maybe you took selfies last night that'll show us what the hell happened in here."

Magnus unlocked his phone and opened his camera roll. "Let's see here-oh look it's Meliorn! There's us dancing with Raphael...there's us again-oh. Oh boy."

Alec tried to see what Magnus was looking at but the warlock kept moving the phone from his view. "What? Magnus, what is it?"

Magnus was silent for a moment. "We may or may not have snorted fairy dust last night."

Alec went silent too. "You've got to be kidding me."

"I wish I was babe but all the proof you need is right here. Look."

Alec took the phone and flicked through the photos. "Oh no. No, no, no, no, no. If my parents find out about this-"

"Which they won't-"

"-I'm dead. So dead. It's bad enough they don't approve of my homosexuality but if they hear I snorted fairy dust and partied while I'm supposed to out killing demons, they'll definitely won't approve of me then."

Magnus rolled his eyes. "Relax, Alec. Your parents aren't going to find out about any of this. I'll personally make sure of that. Besides, from the look of those photos, we look like we had a good time last night."

Alec relaxed the grip in his hair. "You think so?"

"Sure. I don't remember much of it but it looked like a bomb ass party. Do kids say bomb ass anymore? I'm not caught up with today's lingo."

Alec sighed heavily. "Maybe we did have fun. I don't remember much either. Still can't figure out why I'm covered in yogurt...."

"I can help clean it off....." Magnus leaned in and licked Alec's abs, smirking deviously.

Alec groaned. "Magnus, not now-"

"Listen. I just woke up from a wild party that involved a glittery cow costume and snorting fairy dust. I deserve nice things and that includes licking the yogurt off your delicious body. So let me do what I want to do."

This shut Alec up immediately as Magnus licked and sucked in all the right places. While he was being cleaned like a cat, he said "I'd do this again, you know."

"Mmhmm," Magnus agreed as he kissed Alec's shoulder.

"Did you wanna maybe....have another party tonight?"

Magnus stopped and pulled away to look into Alec's eyes. "Are you being serious?"

"As serious as a heart attack."

Magnus eyed him. "Can I cover you in chocolate this time?"

"Whatever the fairy dust compels us to do."

Magnus clapped his hands together. "Yes! I'll call our usual crowd. Meliorn can score is some good stuff. Thank god fairy dust isn't addicting. Or else we'd be screwed."

"Yeah, thank god-" Alec was cut off as he screamed when he opened the bathroom door.

"Alec! What's wrong?!" Magnus rushed over to where Alec held the door shut.

"There's a....there's a gator in the tub."

Magnus blinked. "Like an alligator?"

"Yes, Magnus. There's only one animal on this earth called a gator. And that's an alligator. There's one in our bathtub."

Magnus scoffed. "Huh. That was some party last night huh?"

"You think?"

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