Pillow Talk

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The look on Alec's face when they went to bed one night suggested to Magnus that he had something to say. His brow was furrowed and he was squeezing his hands; a nervous tick that only occurred when Alec was trying to think of how to word his question.

"Go on. Spit it out. I know you have something to say," Magnus had said to him.

Alec's mouth worked mechanically, opening and closing but not actually saying anything. He straightened up in the bed, nearly knocking over the lamp beside him. "There's something important we need to talk about."

Oh dear. This didn't sound promising. "Are you breaking up with me?"

Alec eyes widened. "What? No! That's not what I-no! I wasn't going to talk about that."

"Oh. Okay then. Go ahead. I'm listening."

Alec took a deep breath. "This seems a little embarrassing but Jace says it's important for every relationship to have this kind of talk."

Magnus raised an eyebrow. "And you went to Jace for relationship advice."

Alec flushed. "Not my first choice either but he insisted." Clearing his throat, Alec spoke again. "Jace said it's important that we have a pillow talk."

Magnus nearly choked on air. "He said what now?! Is he being serious?"

"I guess? I mean I don't know why he thinks it's so important for us to talk about pillows...."

Magnus bit his lip. Alec had picked up the pillow that was under his elbow and was inspecting it carefully. "No, he's right. It's important for every new relationship to have this talk. I'm glad he brought it up."

Alec cocked his head. "Really? Everyone talks about their pillows?"

"Of course. It defines the entire relationship. It can make us or break us."

Alec looked really worried at this point. Magnus wondered how long he could keep up with his charade before bursting out laughing. "So...okay then. Let's just get right to it. What kind of pillows do you use?"

Magnus pinched himself under the blankets to keep from giggling. "I use down pillows. Nothing beats sleeping on feathers. It almost reminds me of sleeping in a nest."

Alec smiled at this. "I like that. Mine are synthetic foam. Or memory foam."

"I know what synthetic foam is, Alexander," Magnus almost lost all of his self-control as Alec continued to assess the pillows on the bed. He looked so deep in concentration that Magnus felt kind of bad for stringing him along on the joke. He wasn't going to last much longer before he was going to burst out laughing. That much he knew. "Was there anything else Jace said that we should talk about?"

Scrunching his face, Alec shook his head. "No. I think that's it. Just that we needed to have a discussion on pillows. Sounds ridiculous, doesn't it?"

He began to laugh and Magnus couldn't take it anymore. He buried his face in his hands and began to laugh so hard that he began to cry. He was well aware of the fact that Alec was staring at him in confusion but he didn't care. He continued to laugh until his boyfriend finally spoke up.

"What's so funny?" Alec placed a hand on Magnus' back. "Why are you laughing so hard?"

Magnus wiped his tears and tried to speak but only began to laugh again. He even snorted. "Alexander! Do you even know what pillow talk is?"

Alec shrugged. "A talk about pillows? It's pretty self-explanatory." The warlock roared with laughter again, which made Alec lose his patience a little bit. "Seriously, Magnus. What's so funny?"

When Magnus finally caught his breath again, he placed a gentle hand on Alec's shoulder with a sigh. "Alec. Babe....that's not what pillow talk is."

Alec frowned. "It's not?"

"No. It's not. It's....a very different kind of talk."

"Then what is it?"

Magnus snickered. "It's when a couple get really intimate in bed. At least the conversation is anyway."

Alec's face went bright red. "Then why did Jace tell me it was about pillows?"

"You'll have to ask him that. In my opinion, he did it just for a joke. It sounds like something he would do."

Alec gripped his hair and groaned. "I'm going to kill him! Why would he do that to me? Now I feel like an idiot for even saying anything!"

Magnus rubbed Alec's back with a hand. "Don't feel stupid. I thought it was really cute. You're so innocent and clueless that it's endearing."

Alec looked at him. "Seriously? You honestly found this whole conversation cute?"

"I did. Now shut up and let me bask in your cuteness," Magnus kissed Alec's shoulder. "Let's go to sleep. We can plot out revenge against Jace in the morning."

Alec smirked. "Revenge, huh? What did you have in mind?"

"I'll tell you in the morning. Right now we need to get some sleep. All this pillow talk made me tired-ow! Don't smack me!"

"I didn't smack you hard. It was a warning smack. Meaning tonight never happened. We didn't have this discussion about pillows. Forget everything I said."

Magnus shrugged. "Whatever you say, I guess. I still found it cute-"

"Goodnight!"

Magnus grinned to himself as Alec shut off the lamp beside them. "Goodnight, cuteness."

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