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This is my first ever Joshler fic :)
However, it's gonna be a really dark story so just heads up. Stay safe, lovelies ❤️ xx
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Josh stared at his computer screen, the cursor hovering over the 'create new account' button. Should he do it? Should he click it?

The black haired teen looked back up at the web name, his eyes glancing back and forth between it and the 'create new account' button. Www.safespace.com. Josh thought that the website was a joke, I mean seriously, what is this, a counseling website? Somewhere to get help? Josh had given up on the thought of help long ago. No one was ever able to help him, not therapists, not his parents, and definitely not his ex boyfriend and his ex friends. He couldn't even save himself, so what would make him think that this silly site could help him?

Josh shook his head, closing out of the site and closing his laptop. He was overthinking it, it's just a stupid website he found through tumblr through his #depression tag. He's scrolled past hundreds of suicide prevention websites before and ignored them, why would this one be any different?

Yawning, he set the laptop down on the table next to his bed. The lights were already turned off because let's face it, Josh is practically a vampire when it comes to bright lights. He hated them. He preferred the darkness, in fact he craved the darkness. Not to mention that it was already three in the morning and his mother had sent him to bed hours ago.

Josh laid down, pulling the blankets across his body. But yet, he couldn't get tired. Well, maybe sleepy is the correct term as Josh was always tired, mentally anyway. He was exhausted by the thoughts that ate at his brain, consuming his every being. He tried to ignore it though, closing his eyes and counting in his head.

One. Inhale. Two. Exhale. One. Inhale. Two. Exhale.

He repeated this pattern several times as he always did before bed, slowing his breathing down just enough to relax. He found that this was helpful, especially because since he was so focused on his breathing and his counting that the darker side of his brain, the sickening thing called depression, couldn't try to keep him up longer.

However, tonight it didn't seem to work. Somehow, he was still wide awake. The teenager contemplated whether he should take a sleeping pill to help him. Or two. Or three. Or hey, why not a handful? Then he remember that his mother had taken all of his medication and locked it in her bathroom after what happened last time. She kept the key on her at all times, only opening the cabinet to get out what was necessary before locking it back up again.

Instead, Josh sat up straight on his bed, grabbing the laptop next to him and swinging the top up. He tapped a few buttons to wake it up before clicking on on the web. He typed the site in quickly, his fingertips pressing the keys almost effortlessly. Www.SafeSpace.com. However, as soon as he typed it in, it redirected him to another site, www.DeathsHand.com. Immediately he became interested, he hadn't noticed it doing this before. He'd clicked on the website earlier but it didn't send him here.

Another tab popped up this time, asking if he'd like to go back to safespace.com but Josh immediately clicked no. Now he was too curious to go back.

Josh clicked on the join button, this time without hesitation. A page then popped up, but this time is was just a long page of rules and disclaimers. Josh scrolled to the bottom, not even bothering to read them before clicking the 'I accept' checkbox and continuing on. Something that he might should've done, but who has time for those, to be honest? Josh was then led to a new page. An account setup page.

Josh scratched the back of his neck, debating whether to use his tumblr url, Jishwa1975, as the user or not. No. And he certainly wasn't going to be using his real name either. So he made up his own user: SpookyJim.

Death Pact ~ JoshlerWhere stories live. Discover now