1969 - The Rolling Stones

Chapter Twenty Nine

It was 6 A.M. in the windy city of Chicago. The freshness of a new place I'd never stepped foot in still couldn't ease my mind from the events of the night before. Lulu placed a steaming plate of food before me on the tiny coffee table, but I was too wrecked with nerves to even think about eating.

"Tell me what's up. I know you didn't just come here for a visit, I mean, look at you," Her voice was filled with endearment as she sat on a petite sofa across from me. "You look like you've been through hell and back."

"I should've told you about the baby." I choked out, still not glancing up from my palms. Her eyes widened at the word.

"Oh my gosh, you're pregnant? This is great! I'm going to be an aunt!" I thought about how much I could've used her enthusiasm before. I didn't realize how much I needed her. Before everything was bad. Before I lost the baby.

"No." A tear trickled down my blotchy, red face. "The baby's gone." Her eyes changed dramatically, from bright, and excited to squinted, and sympathetic.

"Olivia, I-" She looked down for a moment to find the right words. "I'm so sorry. You and Mick would've made great parents, I know that for sure." Her long slender arms embraced me, but I felt no comfort.

"If Mick was even the father." I commented rather quietly. "But now we'll never know."

"Don't tell me," Lulu held my shoulders back and stared me in the face with a shocked expression. "It's Keith!" I shrugged and rubbed my sleepy eyes.

"Like I said, we'll never know." I leaned back and squeezed my eyes shut. "You missed so much, Lu. So much happened. So much changed."

"I know sweetie, and I wish I could've stayed, but a part of me just had to get out of there. I had to grow up a little, ya know? Plus I was hopelessly in love with that dirtbag, Rich." She giggled lightly, causing a small smile to form on my lips. "But now you're here and you can tell me all about it."

"Can we wait a little while? I'm so tired." She led me to the spare room in the back of her cozy apartment. I was so used to living in that big house in Laurel Canyon with all those boys, so it was something different for me, but I loved it. I just had to make sure my mind was occupied so that I didn't think about them, or anyone. It made my stomach churn to think that I just left them there with a shitty note and no real explanation. I didn't think I could ever explain it.

The next morning, I finally found the energy to tell her everything that happened since she'd been gone.