love like fools ➙ glee

twenty-four ; what i did for love.

Alicia's fingertips grazed the Hallmark card in her hands.

There were Disney princesses on it. Belle, Ariel, Cinderella, Jasmine, Mulan, Aurora. It was a little faded, the deep red in Ariel's hair resembling an unappealing shade of pink. Not that she cared. It wasn't the image that meant so much to her, but rather, the words messily scrawled inside the card.

She knew better.

Well, she was supposed to.

There was the sound of rummaging several feet away, along with a thunk followed by a yelp. Making sure nothing was broken (including bones) was an option, but she couldn't tear her attention away from the card she'd forgotten existed.

It was given to her during her eighth birthday party.

Two months after her sixteenth birthday, it felt like a lifetime ago. No wonder she'd forgotten.

Golden light illuminated the black ink when she opened the card. Fairy lights she'd asked Finn to hang over the summer were above her, shining down on Alicia and all the memories better off repressed. Yet here she was, digging them up and digging her own grave in the process.

She still recognized the handwriting. Even if he hadn't addressed a card to her in so many years that she'd lost count. Maybe this was the last one she'd received. Maybe it was better that way. Less demons to sink their clutches into her; less night terrors to chase away when overthinking haunted her subconscious.

Happy birthday, Sunshine!

Today is your big day. Eight years old. You're growing up so fast and I'm excited to stay by your side every step of the way. You already make me so proud. You're my number one (which is great because I know how much you love that number) and you will be forever. Never forget that.

Love always,

Daddy.

She'd forgotten how he called her "sunshine." 

"Hey, Ali." Finn's voice should've surprised her. It was abrupt and suddenly close, despite how he was digging through her closet less than a minute before. Or maybe it was longer than that and she had gotten too caught up in memories. "I think I found that scrapbook you were looking for. The one you made with your mom when you were, like, eleven?"

Right. Her mom, who didn't know Finn came over almost everyday this summer. Her mom, who was suspicious yet peacefully oblivious to the web of dishonesty Alicia tangled them all up in.

She forced a small smile, gently setting the card onto her desk and accepting the scrapbook. It was tattered, as expected. It spent years rotting away in the deepest recesses of Alicia's closet. The cover was pastel pink, Disney princesses also decorating it. She smiled at the sight of Bella, Aurora, and Cinderella. She hadn't gotten over that phase for a long time.

Actually, she still hadn't. Some childhood favorites became classics.

Inside the scrapbook, countless photos of herself and her mom (occasionally with Mariana or Uncle Jamie) were aesthetically arranged. They'd spent the entire winter break after her father's abrupt departure creating it. Arabella thought it would be healthy for Alicia to remember that she was loved and their family was not entirely obliterated.

It was a small family. But it was a warm one, and that was what counted.

"Hey, what's that?"

At once, Alicia's good mood diminished. Finn held the card with the sort of carefulness she'd expected more from Kurt, but that didn't ease her worries. She snatched it away from him, tucking it under her arm. "Nothing. Just a silly thing from when I was a kid."