Catfish [l.s] (boyxboy)

IM Sorry

dos more chapters, this one and another. are you excited? are you upset? are you crying? bc i sure am oops

double update today, just to finish off the book. one now (duh) and one in a few hours. 

if you want, i can also post the sequel and the first chapter of it tonight but then you won't get another update until monday or tuesday. it's up to you. i can wait until tomorrow to do it, but i will be gone for a trip (as I've said) after that so I will be limited to replying to your comments and messages via the wattpad app. i'll ask you to comment on the next chapter letting me know which you'd prefer.

QOTC: top!louis or top!harry ? 

_________

Louis' on the phone with Eve when Harry steps in. 

"Yeah, and I really don't understand it either. I mean, why would anyone want to have a pet tarantula?" Louis' tone softens as Harry slips into the room and stands awkwardly by the door.

"Spiders are cool!"

"Yeah," Louis mumbles, staring at Harry as he licks his lips. "Um.. Eve? Can I call you back in a few?"

"Wha-"

"Cool, thanks, bye!" he chirps and hangs up abruptly, shoving his phone in his pocket and looking up blankly at Harry. "What do you want?" Louis snaps, "I haven't said another word to your fucking Colette."

Harry sighs all heavy and sad, "Listen, about that.. Louis, I'm sorry." 

Louis snorts. "Okay."

"Louis.."

"Harry," Louis mimics, "Just because you're sorry doesn't change anything."

"But I feel really bad and.. Liam forced me to come in here because he wants us to make up," Harry's lower lip trembles in that way that can make Louis bend over backwards just to make Harry happy. He focuses all his energy into keeping a poker face.

"It was wrong of me to.. to ask you to do that. I just - I really like this girl, Lou, and I want you to like her too. I want us all to be happy and be friends again. I'm sorry I accused you of.. making Anna up to hurt me. I know you would never do that, Louis, and I'm sorry I can't return the feelings you have for me. I can't control my sexuality, you of all people should know that." Louis can't do this; he can't forgive Harry any easier than he can forgive himself.

"How can we be friends? We can't just act like none of this ever happened," Louis croaks, and he tries to blink away the tears that are starting to swim in his eyes. He can't cry. Harry, however, sees the glistening in Louis' gaze and rushes over to him. He crouches down and gently wipes the tears from Louis' face with the pads of his thumbs, which only makes Louis cry harder. "I'm just so tired of this, Harry, I hate hating you. But you've been a dick. And I don't like that, Harry, I don't know who you are anymore."

"Yes, Louis, you do. I'm the same Harry I've always been-" he pauses, "C'mere." Louis is pressed to Harry's chest for a hug before he can comprehend Harry's words. He squeezes his eyes shut, even though he's ruining Harry's probably very expensive shirt, and cries into him weakly. Harry's arms are strong and tight around Louis' body, and slowly, very cautiously, Louis raises his own arms to wrap around Harry as well. "I'm so sorry, Boo. Please, please, please give me another chance. I'll put everything behind us, we can start all over. We don't even have to talk about The Thing."

Louis pulls away, rubbing at his eyes and sniffling. He does more crying than a hormonal teenage girl these days, he thinks. "The Thing?"

"Yes... the Anna thing. Zayn, Niall and I all call it 'The Thing'."

"Oh," Louis whispers. "But - but I want to talk about it." He looks up at Harry's furrowed brow and beautiful, beautiful green eyes. He's so gorgeous. He's so  out of Louis' reach. "I need to talk about it. It's the only way we can ever.. let this go."

Harry nods, and Louis sighs in relief. "Alright, Lou."

"When I first made the account, I was.. I was going to stop. I loved talking to you, but, like. I didn't want to hurt you. And I just.. got so entranced by the whole thing. I love you, Harry, and I got to be with you through Anna. You have to understand that. I never wanted to manipulate you. I never wanted to see you cry. I never wanted to sneak behind your back or keep secrets from you because you are my best friend and I love you so much. I'm such a failure, I'm such a prick," Louis sobs, "I should've listened to Eleanor. I should've deleted it. I should have never gotten involved in your love life because now you'll never want me. You never did want me. You wanted her."

"Louis.. I'm sorry, sweetheart," Harry mumbles sadly. Louis can tell his sympathy is genuine. "If I could be gay for you.. I would. But. I wouldn't be happy in a relationship like that. If I wasn't happy, I'd only be dragging you down." Louis looks away pointedly, staring at the ground. Harry's fingers slide under his chin and direct his gaze back up to Harry's.

"Harry," Louis squirms, trying to pull himself from Harry's grasp.

"Hey, look at me; you deserve someone who won't drag you down. And, Louis, for the record; I love you too."

i didn't proofread this so sorry for any silly errors