The look in your eyes

13

Song: always, I'll care by Jeremy Zucker
(A message from Louis to Harry)

Louis pov
"Hey Louis. I'm sorry for what Gemma did. You have to believe me, I never asked her to do that. I still haven't spoken to her. I'm so mad. I was telling the truth when I said I want another shot with you. Even if it's just as friends. Just talk to me, yeah? I miss your accent." The slow voice rung out of the phone. When was he going to get the message? I wasn't ready. It was the third voicemail he had left in the two days since the encounter with Gemma.

I decided to ignore the phone and go back down to Liam and Zayn. Today had been a good day. My mind didn't feel so all over the place. Harry wasn't going to ruin that.

It was odd Leaving hardly hurt at all. I was truly sorry that I never called him but often I get exhausted just trying regardless to be enough.

I skipped down the stairs quickly. Now the tv was off and both the boys full attention was on me. "What happened to the movie?" I asked awkwardly as I sat back down with my laptop now on my lap.

Zayn and Liam shared a soft look. "Lou, we have to talk." That made me tense up. Were they kicking me out? What was going on? "Just remember you are here. You are safe. Nobody can hurt you, alright?" Liam added softly. I nodded but the scared look didn't shift from my face.

When they seemed to be accepting that I wasn't going to be comfortable with this conversation Zayn continued. "We need to change a few things so you can actually heal and get better." He said quietly.

I swallowed the thick lump in my throat. "We need all your blades and we are taking you to therapy. It will help you, I swear lou." Liam said gently. He knew I'd be hesitant and his words still hadn't convinced me. I got up to walk out of the room only for my arm to be caught by Liam.

They both sent me a questioning looks. "You don't need to send me to therapy. I'm fine li! I'm coping, am I not? Therapy is fucking expensive, I can fucking deal with this on my own." I huffed sitting back down on the couch.

Zayn brought his hand up quickly. I flinched away. Finally this was there breaking point. Like my mother said everyone will get sick of my bullshit eventually. "Exactly! Louis you are not fucking better! You can't just get better from that kind of thing! You need to get help." He growled taking his hand down. His tone was just as scary as the thought of him hitting me. I was paralysed with shock.

I just nodded and whispered a small 'okay' in a scared voice. I got off the couch and scurried up the stairs. This time, nobody stoped me. I made sure I didn't slam the door because that use to get me in more trouble. I just sat on the bed keeping my stare focused on the window.

Liam's pov
I waited until I heard the click of Louis door to say something "Why would you do that?" I asked gobsmacked at the fact Zayn would raise a hand over the boy. "You can't use his abuse to your advantage." I added angrily.

"I'm sorry, okay? I shouldn't have done it, I get that." He huffed but I didn't think he understood how serious what he had done was. "He knew I was never going to hit him." Zayn mumbled. It was barely audible but I caught it.

"Zee it wasn't just your hand it was your voice. He thought you were really angry and when people use to get really angry they would hit him and you had already threatened that." I explained my tone laced with frustration. "I'm going up to see him." I said sadly as I begun to leave the room Zayn was in.

When I got to the top of the stairs however I heard small laughs. I smiled at the thought of Louis on the phone to one of his sisters. They always seemed to lift his spirits. I knocked on the door gently to hear a small "maybe.gotta go Haz. I'll talk to you later." Followed moments later by a timid "come in."

A opened the door to see Louis small frame sitting cross legged on the bed. His delicate hands dancing over his phone quickly. "Who were you talking to?" I asked gently sitting down beside the boy.

He turned his phone off setting it down on the bedside table. "Harry. He called me." He sighed flicking his eyes off me. He was hiding something.

I let it slide and just nodded whilst I sat down on the opposite side of the bed. "Are you okay?" I asked truly not knowing the answer. I couldn't tell. For the first time in years I was lost on how the boy was feeling.

"Yeah, I'm feeling.." he hesitated for a moment looking over to his phone "much better." He added happily with a goofy grin on his face. That smile that I hadn't seen in a long time. Maybe Harry was good for him.

Harry's POV

I figured I'd give it one last shot. I'd call him once more and that was it. I picked up my phone and dialled the number that had been running through my mind since he gave it to me. I had feeling of odd anxiety.

One ring. I still had hope.

Two rings. He wasn't going to pick up.

Three tings. There was no way

Fou- "hello harry!" The overly cheery voice hummed. I double checked that it was him. I had never heard him this happy. It made me smile at the thought of something making him this happy.

"Harry?" The voice asked again sounding a little disappointed this time.

I jumped at that. I didn't want to upset him when he was in such a good mood. "Hi, I didn't actually expect to pick up." I laughed awkwardly.

He returned the small chuckle. It was beautiful. Absolutely gorgeous. "Yeah, well I needed a distraction but I was going to call in a few days once I had cooled down. Anyway back to what I would have told you. I don't blame you for what your sister did. I don't even blame your sister, I was a proper dick to you. It's just complicated, you will have to be patient with me because I still want something with you Haz, I just can't at the moment. But I'll be better than I was before. Despite every text of yours ignored. I like how  you call me still, just to hear my voice.I swear, always, I'll care."  He said in that usual soft tone he had. It was just good to hear his voice again. As he said all of it, it sounded like a revolution to him as well.

I still couldn't help but smile at his words, at the glimmer of hope. I might have been a distraction but I was happy to settle for that at the moment. "Good, I'm so glad. Maybe I will work up the courage to ask you out before you graduate." I laughed even though I was being completely honest in my words. Maybe, I was too honest. I instantly got scared was I too honest? Was I scaring him away?

I wave of relief hit when I heard his soft laugh again. "maybe.gotta go Haz. I'll talk to you later." He hummed. I returned the niceties and hung up instantly missing the short boys voice.