Hollow || Edward Cullen

36. Just Friends

||Lynna's P.O.V.||

Thank you for coming to dinner tonight. Things have been weird at home since dad got engaged. Noah signed as he walked me to my front door.

I had gone with Noah to his family dinner per his request. He and his dad have been sort of at odds with each other since announcing the engagement. Noah's little sister, Sadie, was thrilled with the prospect of having a stepmother, but Noah, on the other hand, was anything but.

"You're welcome," I said to him, offering him a smile. "Thank you for inviting me. It's been a while since we've done anything together outside of school."

He nodded, smiling. I'll see you tomorrow.

When I walked into my bedroom, a startled gasp flew through my lips when I saw Edward sitting in the recliner next to the window. His brows flew up his forehead, a frown pulling down his features as I hurried to close the door behind me.

"You're late," he commented, standing up from the chair and slowly approaching me.

"By five minutes," I mumbled as I took off my earrings and placed them in my jewelry box.

I could feel his eyes on me as I slipped off my heels, putting my back towards him. My breath hitched in my throat when I felt his cool body press against me from behind. He wrapped his arms around my waist and molded me against him. My heart immediately responded to the gesture by going haywire. When his lips lightly grazed the side of my neck, I nearly melted.

"I'm relieved that you weren't with Tyler," he murmured huskily, his cool breath fanning against my skin and eliciting a delicious shiver to travel down my spine. "Why you didn't simply tell me you were meeting Noah, I'll never know. If I didn't know any better, I would think you were trying to make me jealous."

He firmly pressed his lips at the hollow beneath my ear. I had to bite back a moan when I felt his solid erection digging against my backside. My lower stomach tightened as I threw my head back, granting him better access to my neck.

I sighed out of pleasure when he began peppering gentle kisses up and down my neck, leaving me breathless.

"Were you trying to make me jealous, Lynna? Tell me the truth," he spoke in a low, gravelly voice that had me pressing my thighs together desperately.

I pulled my lower lip between my teeth in longing, struggling to get a grip. I couldn't just give in to him so easily. He had made it perfectly clear that our 'arrangement' wasn't going to go anywhere.

"Did it work?" I finally asked, surprised when my voice didn't waver.

A growl came from deep within his chest as he gripped my hips, causing my heart to stutter.

"I'll take that as a yes," I mumbled before attempting to untangle myself from him.

I couldn't think straight with his body pressed against mine, and it was important for me to have a clear head right now. How easy it would be for me to give in to his touch; to beg for his kiss. My hormones screamed in protest the second I pulled away from him, but I needed to be strong. I deserve better than being some dirty little secret.

When I turned around to face him, I was surprised to see the amount of lust he had in his eyes. He looked.. ravenous. Despite myself, heat settled in my core, yearning for him.

I took a step back, putting some much-needed distance between us before I said, "You wanted to talk. So, talk."

He pressed his lips into a thin line, releasing a deep sigh as he ran his hand through his hair. "Lynna, I-I don't know what to do, okay?"

"About what?" I wasted no time in asking.

He sighed once more, his face pulling down in a frown. "I-" He opened and closed his mouth repeatedly, seeming to be at a loss for words. "Lynna, I.. I don't want to lose you."

My heart swelled with hope despite my best efforts. I pressed my lips into a thin line, forcing myself to focus on the task at hand. "Why is that, Edward?"

His brows knitted together. "What?"

I folded my arms across my chest and looked up at him expectantly. "You say you don't want to lose me. I want to know why that is."

His frown deepened. I watched as different emotions swirled in the depths of his pupils. To me, he seemed... ambivalent. "Well.." He trailed off, his gaze dropping to the floor. "I.. I mean.. I care for you. Obviously."

"You 'care' for me?" I repeated, quirking a brow.

That could mean a multitude of things, so I was trying not to let myself get carried away. But my heart had other plans as it picked up its tempo.

He nodded once, pursing his lips. "...Yes."

I pulled my lower lip between my teeth, inhaling a shaky breath before asking, "In.. In what way?"

He exhaled sharply and ran a hand through his hair once more, causing it to stand up on end. "What do you mean, Lynna?"

I stifled an eye-roll. Was I going to have to spell it out for him? Boys are clueless. Whether they're seventeen or a hundred-and-twenty-two.

"I mean exactly what I'm asking. In. What. Way." I threw my hands up in the air, growing frustrated. "As in.. like a friend? Or.." I bit my lower lip nervously before whispering, "..something more?"

His jaw went slack before snapping shut with an audible click. I could have sworn his face paled despite it being physically impossible. He looked.. terrified. My stomach churned anxiously at the realization. This 'talk' wasn't going to go how either one of us envisioned it.

He slowly shook his head, sorrow painting his features like a canvas. My heart sank at the sight.

"Lynna, I-" He continued shaking his head; an apologetic smile flitted to his lips as he whispered, "I'm not ready."

A lump formed in my throat at his words. Did I expect anything less? Of course not. But still-A part of me had hoped.

"I'm sorry," he breathed out, his eyes full of sympathy and anguish. His expression was one of pain as he said, "You were right to end things between us.."

My throat burned from fighting back the wave of tears that threatened to spill from my eyes. I was on pins and needles, waiting for him to continue.

"As much as I want you..." He gazed into my eyes from afar, holding mine captive before saying, "And believe me, I do. But as much as I want you, it wouldn't be fair of me to ask you to allow this to continue.." He stared off into the distance, seeming to collect his thoughts. "I can't...be who you want me to be."

My heart clenched in my chest. "And who's that?" I asked in a faint whisper, worried that my voice was going to crack.

His jaw clenched when he looked at me with undiluted sadness. "Someone worthy of you," he spoke with finality.

Now, I was at a loss for words. My heart was in my throat. I closed my eyes, not wanting him to see the heartbreak that they would display.

"I can.. leave town," he spoke in a voice that was barely above a whisper. "If that will make things easier for you."

My eyes flew open, connecting with his immediately. Panic pierced through me at the thought of him leaving. "Don't go," I was quick to say. "I mean.. You don't have to leave."

His features were hardened, his gaze unwavering as he asked, "How can I stay?"

I racked my brain for something, anything, to hold onto. Without a second thought, I blurted out, "We can be friends."

For a moment, his stoic façade faltered, revealing a devastated boy with his heart in his eyes.

My heart was racing as I softly spoke, "Like actual friends."

He quirked a brow. "Friends?"

I blinked rapidly, nodding.

He pressed his lips into a thin line, appearing deep in thought before saying, "You mean.. Like you and Noah."

"That's right," I breathed out, refusing to break eye contact. "Friends. Friends that speak to each other in public and aren't afraid to be seen with each other."

He leaned against the wall, his shoulders slumping forward as he stared down at the floor. His expression was unreadable.

"Edward." His name rolled off my tongue like a soft melody. "I don't want to lose you either," I admitted, fully aware of how true that was.

I didn't want to lose him entirely. My heart was already invested in him. The thought of never seeing him again was too painful to even think about.

He inhaled a shaky breath, his golden eyes glistening as they poured into mine from across the room.

"I would rather have you as a friend..." I trailed off, pulling my lower lip between my teeth to keep it from trembling before I found the strength to continue, "...than not have you at all."

I watched as he closed his eyes, allowing my words to sink in.