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After we met at the courthouse, $25,000 was added to my account. It definitely felt like more money than it actually was. I guess by now, money wasn't an issue anymore, but there are still reasons I'd rather stay. If Luke didn't yell at me last night then I would change my mind and go for sure, but now I'm rethinking the whole Luke and I thing, let alone even going. 

After getting home I decide I need time alone. No ones in our flat so now is the perfect opportunity. I feel so stressed out, I try to take my mind off of whats happening. I lay down and unlock my phone to scroll through twitter. I noticed a tweet that was written by Luke.

Luke5SOS:

I really fucked up last night.


And he leaves it at that. I hope it was about me, because he really did fuck up last night. Even with the tweet I don't know how easy it will be to forgive him. Any other girl would be screaming at me saying its an easy and obvious choice, but you have to understand that Luke didn't even try to hear me out. I really like him, but the fact that he couldn't even try to understand is heartbreaking 

I favorite the tweet so that he knows I saw it, even though it will be flooded in with all the other comments and favorites.  I keep scrolling through twitter and favorite some tweets, and accidentally re-tweet some of them. I sit at home, alone petting Addie and scrolling though Instagram when there's a knock on my door. Addie starts barking off the hook, and running to the door. 

"Addie shhh." I say shooshing her. Her barking doesn't stop until I open the door to see Luke. 

"hi." I say the most awkward way I can. Luke bends down to pick up my little barker.

"Amanda---"

I cut him off. "Don't" 

I would've slammed the door on him if he wasn't holding my dog.

"Let me explain." He says. I don't know that's much to explain here, but I can be nice. 

"k" I say motioning for him to come in. As he comes in, I close the door. He walks to the couch and sits down so I join him, and sit near him but keep a safe distance away from him at the same time.  "talk" I say not wanting to deal with any bullshit. 

"Mandy..." 

"Don't call me that" Luke calling me 'Mandy' just makes me fall for him even more and I don't want that. 

"I'm sorry. I'm crazy into you and I risked losing you too much already. Amanda give me one more chance to show you how much you mean to me. I know this is a shitty ass apology but I mean it with all I've got. And last night I shouldn't have gotten mad at you, and now I understand if you still don't want to come." Luke's words don't mean much, but they mean a lot to me. 

"Luke" I say, I scoot closer to him on our couch and lean in and close my eyes. As soon as Luke's lips meet mine my dumb ass forgives him. 

"Mandy, I'm really sorry, I will make it up to you." He says. "Now can we just go cuddle and talk in your bed?"

My mind flashes back to last night and this morning. Oh god. There's stains on my carpet and in my bed. Luke stands up, "No no no, I, I wasn't expecting you, my room is really a mess. Maybe we can cuddle out here." 

"Amanda, I'm sure its fine." Luke starts to walk that way and he gets to my door.

I run to him, "LUKE DON'T!" But its too late, the door is wide open and both of the blood stains stick out from everything else in the room. 

"Amanda? what has happened in here?" Luke turns to me and carefully grabs my hand and starts to pull up my shirts sleeve. I yank my arm away quickly and wince in pain. "Baby..."

"Nothing happened." I say. 

"Come here." He grabs a blanket from a our basket next to the TV. Luke grabs my hand and brings me to our couch. we are able to sit horizontally due to a large ottoman that connects with the couch. Luke's arms wrap me up into a hug, Its as if we are laying in bed but instead we are on a couch. 

"I'm sorry Luke." I say as a tear rolls down my cheek. 

"Amanda, don't apologize. This is entirely my fault, I shouldn't have yelled at you like that." His sweet words only make me cry harder. "Baby, don't cry, its okay now." 

I kiss his lips one more time until I fall asleep, Addie's back against mine. 

~~~~~

I have been gone for sooooooo long, I'm so sorry, but school starts this week so 

i can't say that ill update more bc I probably wont.... sorry....

But iv updated for now <3

_rainaaaa


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