If I Really Knew You || Calum Hood (completed)

Chapter 13

*CALUM'S POV*

I prayed she couldn't feel my heart slamming against as I pressed my lips against hers. I kissed her softly at first, afraid to mess anything up. I panicked as the time ticked by and she didn't kiss back. Just as I was about to pull back from embarrassment, I felt her respond. I let out a sigh that I didn't realize I had been holding. As her lips moved against mine, I moved my hands and raked through her hair with my finger tips. I was able to feel her smile grow even bigger and it drove me crazy. 

I had been waiting since I knew I liked her to kiss her. I had always thought it would've been easier and less awkward to do it, like every other girl I had kissed. Not that I had kissed everyone I had seen, but it felt different this time. I felt different. But it was definitely a good different. 

I finally pulled away, knowing that if I had gone any further, I didn't know where it would end. She bit her lip as she stared back at me under slightly hooded eyelids. 

"That was wow," she sighed, dreamily making eye contact with me.

It was all I could do not to kiss her again, and I nodded in agreement.

"I," she began, clearly flustered, "I never thought this would actually happen. This is still all too crazy."

I felt a pang of uneasiness. I was still slightly disappointed she still thought of me as the Calum Hood. To her I just wanted to be a normal guy, not this big musician fresh off a huge world tour, but I knew there was nothing I could do to change it. That was the downside to liking a fan. She was so in love with me as a band member, but barely knew me as me. I had hoped spending time together would change that and take me away from my career and single me out as myself. 

She waited for me to respond. I blinked, "Huh?"

"No I just, it's like still a bit unreal."

"You need me to remind you that it's real?" I chuckled, wriggling my eyebrows. 

She laughed and rolled her eyes as I leaned down and pecked her lips. 

"You're not helping the situation, Cal."

My stomach filled with butterflies as she used my nickname. I sighed at sat up, climbing off of her. I sat crosslegged and pulled her up to sit facing me again. Our knees knocked against each other as she readjusted and settled into the couch. I took her hands. 

"Okay. I just want to like, explain I guess," I rubbed my thumbs over the top of her delicate hands, looking down at them. "This is all really happening. I, uh, I erm," I cleared my throat, suddenly finding it really hard to speak. "I really do like you and I know that it's probably really overwhelming and everything but I wanna you know," cleared my throat again, "I want to see where this goes. But um, I want to make sure it's the real me that you like, like, um-"

"I know what you mean." she saved me, "It's gonna be hard. Like I may mess up a little. Like you know that Hannah Montana episode when Lily finds out that Miley's really Hannah and then Lily accidentally calls Miley, Hannah?"

I looked at her, smirking, "Yeah, I do actually."

"Well it may just be like that a while like adjusting and whatnot."

I nodded, "That's fine."

"Like, I honestly had just adjusted to the whole you being Alex thing. And I know that everything you told me as her was really as you. And I know that's your life and I know it's all private and whatnot, that you don't have to worry about. But now you just kissed me, so all my progress is over the moon again," she laughed, "That was unexpected."