social media - sdmn

irl // josh

[ alyssa's pov ]

"so josh, what did you want the tell me?"

"well..uh it's hard to explain, you see i don't know how you would feel- and i don't know if you will resent me after i tell you and-"

"josh..nothing you could ever say would make me resent you."

"i love you."

"i love you too josh, now what did you want to tell me?"

he sat and looked at me so solemnly that the only thing i could do is realise that's exactly what he wanted to tell me.

and i couldn't help but be frozen in place, unsure if i feel the same way.

then i realised he has a girlfriend.

"josh...y-you can't love me like that. you have a girlfriend and i am in a complicated situation."

"but you're not denying your love for me."

"yes, josh i love you..but, but not like that. i think you should go."

"alyssa...i."

"josh....i don't want to be mean. and i really don't want to cry in front of you so it'd be nice if you got the fuck out of my flat."

the tears started to brim in my eyes as i came to the realisation that one of the best relationships in my life was ruined today over a feeling.

he got up, very hurt looking. as i tear rolled down his face and his bright eyes not so bright any more he says, "fine, resent me then. but i will never stop loving you. it just turns out that i'm too late."

then he turned and left, the sound of the door closing sounding a lot louder than it usually does.

"why is everything so complicated."