The Wolf and The Lion || Jaime Lannister

Nineteen

Jaime

I've been trapped in this fucking cage for at least two months now. It's been weeks since I wrote to Rayna. Catelyn hasn't seen me since she found out Rayna was pregnant and Robb hasn't since I wrote the letters.
No one has told me anything and it's driving me insane. I overheard the guards talking about Neds execution. Gods no one thought that it would come to this, now my son has started a full blown war and Rayna is pregnant and alone in Kings Landing. She loved her father in a way I could never understand, I don't want to imagine her devastation. I need to know what's happening and it's not like they can kill me.
I piss off the guard until he snaps and causes a ruckus.
"What are you doing", Catelyn snaps as she finally walks over.
"Oh Lady Stark finally, I was wondering if you'd forgotten me"
"How can I when I hear complaints about you every single day", she grits between her teeth and it's nice to hear that I've been on their minds.
"I haven't heard anything in gods know how long, is Rayna alright?" I ask. When I ask about Rayna she softens surprisingly and the anger fades. She looks sorrowful as she says to me "Robb didn't tell you did he"
"Tell me what", I ask fearfully. "I heard about Ned but nothing about her"
She sighs heavily and her voice goes quiet "She had a miscarriage when your son cut my husbands head off"
My heart falls as it sinks in. Rayna lost the baby. I admit I didn't expect the pregnancy to last yet I still had hope, hope that she could strike a deal with my father and things would end peacefully. Hope that I could be a father and have the life part of me has always dreamed of but now that hope is gone because of my own son. I thought Cersei would find some way to forcefully end the pregnancy but I didn't expect it to happen like it did. While she watched her Father die. I close my eyes to push away the images that come to mind of her on that platform watching in helplessness as her father was executed. I try to block out the screams that I can imagine too vividly.
"Is she alright", I ask knowing she isn't, how could she be but I need to know she is isn't being held in a cell like I am.
"I don't know, Cersei allowed her to send one letter, to beg Robb not to harm you and saying that if you die so do her and Sansa"
"How long ago", I ask as the hope that she still cares fills me, as that tiny bit of hope gives me the strength to keep going.
"We received it over a month ago, I assumed Robb would have told you"
"That my pregnant lover lost our child" I finish bitterly.
"Yes", she says actually seeming the tiniest bit pitiful.
"You know Catelyn, I was never able to be a Father to my own children", I tell her "Cersei forbade me being close with them at all, not that I wanted to be close to Joffrey, he is purely sadistic and the fact that Rayna and your daughters are stuck with him and my sister terrifies me"
"We know now that Arya is missing, Cersei tried to hide it so we might trade you I assume, for three daughters instead of two but"
"Robb won't hear it", I finish again "Just like I told you"
Her silence only confirms it.
"I do hope he figures something out soon, I'm not really fit for being a prisoner"
"By the looks of it you aren't going anywhere", she informs me finally becoming civil.
"Just as I suspected, but if you hear anything about Rayna, please let me know, I know you hate me but I am the only person here who cares about her as much as you do"
She quietly nods and we both know it's the truth. She sees Robb exiting his tent and goes to join him before he sees her speaking with me.
The setting sun glows orange on the horizon and I play Raynas ring on the chain around me neck, I have another long night ahead of me.

Rayna

I'm fiddling with the Lannister ring around my finger late at night when a knock at my door startles. I jump to my feet to stand beside the door and I push my skirt aside to grip the handle of Jaimes dagger which I still keep strapped to my thigh.
"Who is it?", I call out checking that the door is bolted.
"Tyrion Lannister"
Oh thank the gods. I remove my hand from the handle of the dagger and let me skirt fall back down as I open the door.
"Your back", I say relieved that this man I hardly know has returned, but he is the only friendly face in this city.
"I am", he says walking in with melancholy expression "I believe we have much to discuss".
"We do indeed", I agree as I shut and bolt the door behind us.
"Firstly I am sorry about your Father, he was an honourable man, he may have confessed to the charges in the end but many know he was innocent and spoke only the truth"
"Thank you Lord Tyrion", I say genuinely touched, not one soul in this city has expressed sympathy for my father except for Littlefinger but I doubt it was genuine "But you're here about more than just my Father"
"I am, you see I only just got back and I want to hear from you, not Cersei or anyone else what happened"
"What do you know?" I ask as we take a seat.
"Jaime attacked your father and went to lead an army against your brother and was captured, before word could reach of his capture your father was executed on charges of treason"
I poor us each a glass of wine to loosen his lips as he avoids the biggest truth "Did you know Jaime pushed Bran?"
"So you do know", he says quietly "What exactly happened between you and Jaime?"
"We had an affair, what happened in Winterfell that you knew of was only the beginning. My father organised my engagement to Loras Tyrell and then we continued the affair while I was engaged not that Loras cared since he's with Renly. Jaime and I started sharing a bed and he asked me to marry him which I of course accepted but my father refused it. We were going to elope then my mother kidnapped you and Jaime let his anger get the better of him and from there everything went to shit"
"How did you find out about Bran?", he asks sadly and I know that he definitely doesn't approve of what Jaime did but he still loves his brother. 
"I pieced it together after we were engaged but I thought I was being foolish but in reality I was just blind and I denied it. Then on the morning of my wedding to Loras my father told me the truth and as disgusted as I was, as much as I hated him I still loved him and I wanted answers so I broke my oath to the Tyrells and ran away from my wedding to confront Jaime. I screamed at him quite a bit but I was still madly in love with him", I say quietly as my heart still aches "Then despite everything I spent one last night with him, the man who crippled my brother"
"Rayna", Tyrion says gently "It's okay to love him and it's okay to hate him, I know the man Jaime is, I've seen the worst parts of him and the best. He has done awful things and I was horrified when I figured it out but not shocked, he will do anything to protect those he loves, he had fallen out of love with Cersei by then but he loved the children, if Bran mentioned anything to your Father"
"He wouldn't have", I argue defensively.
"How do you know that?" He asks me "Your Father found out the truth anyways and tried to exposed them, the point is Jaime wouldn't take the risk, he sees the bigger picture, he thought one boy in exchange for his family"
"I understand why but how could he lie to me, for months", I exclaim bitterly as my anger still burns inside of me "He could look me in the eye and tell me he loved me, could sleep with me while knowing what he's doneL
"That is what I couldn't condone, before Bran was pushed I had encouraged Jaime to court you, it would have been a good match but little did I know that Ned thought the Lannister's murdered the previous hand of the king and then suspected us of much more. Then when he pushed Bran, I told him if he was going to speak to you to offer your condolences and find out if you thought that we did it, but clearly he did more than that"
So it was Tyrion who encouraged him to do it. A logical move but a hurtful one. Jaime indeed did more than just find out if I knew anything.
"The sick thing is I can almost forgive him for Bran as that part I can understand, I'll never fully forgive him of course but I can understand. The lies are what I can't understand, why did he keep courting me after what he did?"
He sighs and takes a long drink of wine before refilling the glass.
"Let me tell you what I know, you are owed that much", he says considerately "He had you in mind as a potential woman to court when he came to Winterfell. When he met you you reminded him of Cersei, well Cersei when she was far younger, not looks clearly but personality which I found alarming. But for the first time he was willing to find someone other than her and I wanted to help him so if he found someone who he thought was a bit similar I thought okay we can start with that"
"I reminded him of Cersei", I gag unable help the disgust I feel at the comparison.
"Yes you did, and sitting here I can see it now, the mannerisms, how you hold your head high, how you present yourself, and from what I saw in Winterfell a few other things"
"Like what", I ask wanting to know exactly what Jaime would have seen.
"You are cunning, very sharp, have a strong sense of family, a lot of things, even the drinking"
I raise my eyebrows as I take a drink "That habits only developed recently"
"Little things you did and how you acted towards most people reminded him of Cersei but when he got to know you, you reminded him of himself a bit, a female Jaime if you will"
I nod knowingly, I had often felt the same.
"I did see parts of myself in Jaime as well", I acknowledge as all those little things I had suppressed come to the surface.
"When you were with him you didn't treat him like the Kingslayer or some infamous knight, you wanted to know more about him, not judge what you already knew like most people do and I believe that is what made him begin to fall for you"
"I was intrigued by him, by the stories of him but I wanted to know what was under that facade", I say stiffly as I take another drink knowing I'll need it to get through this conversation.
"And you found it unlike most people. Your parents saw Jaime as the Kingslayer, when your father saw Jaime he saw the man he found sitting on the Iron Throne the day he was dubbed the kingslayer, and your mother sees the man accused of so many awful deeds, who crippled her son"
"I just want to know why he lied", I say unable to fight the pain that creeps into my voice.
"Only Jaime knows why he courted you in the first place, my guess is as I said he saw parts of himself in you, someone who wouldn't judge him, he found a way to escape his old life. He found a respectable woman with title and then lust overcame him, and from there he fell in love. One thing I know about Jaime that's certain is that he will do anything for love, no matter how mad or wrong it is, if he loves someone he will do anything for them, he loves selfishly and he fights for it"
"Oh I know that", I say smiling to myself a little bittersweetly "I don't doubt his love for me, I was prepared to marry him even after what he did, your Father even agreed"
"You asked my Father to marry Jaime after everything went to shit, why?" he asks knowing that any respectable woman would never do that.
"I was pregnant", I say quietly.
"Was?" He asks as his eyes widen in realisation.
I take another drink of wine and try to find my words as I refill my glass.
"I was pregnant, I found out while my father was imprisoned, I wrote to Tywin to strike a deal but Cersei found out and threatened me so I wrote Jaime and Robb to tell them as I feared for my life. Tywin agreed to free my father if he swore Joffrey was the true king, to free me and my sisters from being political prisoners. I thought that as angry as I might have been at Jaime that I'd marry him and have his child and eventually everything would be okay. The next day when my father was meant to be freed Joffrey had his head cut off instead. Within a few moments I'd lost my father and my baby"
"Rayna, I'm so sorry", he says genuinely. Tears come to my eyes but I pull myself together and keep my head high.
"A few days after that I got the news that Jaime was captured, they were going to trade him for my father and us but it was too late. Robb must have let Jaime write a letter to me, he said that he loved me and that he loved the baby. I could tell that although it was certainly unplanned he was happy, but terrified for all of us and rightly so. I haven't heard anything since, I know Jaimes alive but Robb won't trade him for me and Sansa"
"Why, you're his sisters?"
"I don't know", I laugh as I try to deal with the anger and the betrayal I feel towards my own brother for abandoning us "But when I see him next Gods help him for leaving Sansa here stuck with Joffrey tormenting her, I try to stop it but who can defy a mad king without losing their head"
"I am being appointed hand of the King", he informs me "I will do what I can for you and your sister"
"Thank you Tyrion", I say realising that I finally have a genuine ally in this city "I want us to be free, I want Jaime to be free, I'll do whatever I need to do to make that happen"
"So will I, do you have anything in mind?" He asks.
"Robb may be indifferent to my sister and I  but my mother won't be, can you help me smuggle a letter to her. Cersei has forbade Sansa and I from sending letters"
"I can do that", he promises "I should let you rest it's late"
"Tyrion", I say as he's standing up "I don't have anyone in Kings Landing I can truly trust"
"Don't worry Rayna, you can trust me, one day if we get Jaime back I'm sure that you will be my sister in law", he says warmly "We will be family some day and I'd definitely prefer to spend the rest of my life watching Jaime love a woman who truly loves him rather than watching him fight for my sisters attention"
"Thank you" I say again, genuinely grateful for him.
"Would you be able to do a favour for me as well", he asks "Since we can trust each other"
"Of course", I answer somewhat confused.
"I have a friend who I've snuck into keep, she needs a reason for being here, and it seems you need a handmaiden"
Ah, he has a lady who he needs to hide from Cersei. "Don't worry, she can be my handmaiden, no one will know who sent her to me"
"Thank you", he says seeming equally grateful "Deliver that letter to me tomorrow and I'll make sure it reaches your mother"
He turns to leave but he stops as if he's remembered something "One more thing I doubt you would be aware of, your brother Robb"
"Yes?"
"His banners have declared him the King in the North"
He leaves and for the first time since my fathers death I feel some of the weight lifted off my shoulders.
Robb is the King in the North. The first one since Torren Stark. That means that the North is breaking away from the realm. My brother is a King but it will mean nothing if he cannot get Sansa and I out of this city.
I know I can trust Tyrion. We both love Jaime and Cersei despises us both. We can help each other.
Tears of relief fall from my eyes as I sit and finally write the letter to my mother.

Mother

It has been a long time since we have spoken. My letters have all been addressed to Robb as I hoped he would be the kindest, that he would listen to me and understand my situation with Jaime. I have wanted to write for weeks but I am forbidden to write to anyone outside of the keep. However Tyrion has returned and I have found an ally in him. Perhaps even a friend. He will ensure this reaches you. I don't know why Robb won't trade us for Jaime but nothing is improving here. People still have some respect for me being Ned Starks eldest but Sansa is just Joffreys plaything to torment. I try to protect her but Joffrey is only becoming more cruel. While Joffrey torments her Cersei torments me with thinly veiled death threats. I am reaching the point where I don't care for my life, if it comes to it I would put it at risk to try to end this war but I cannot leave Sansa alone here. Please try to convince Robb to help us or take things into your own hands. He may be calling himself King in the North but it is you the northmen have respected for years. I am beginning to have Littlefinger wrapped around my finger but I certainly cannot trust him. Tyrion is hand of the King and I am trusting in him. Even if the Queen is willing to trade us for Jaime nothing can happen if Robb doesn't agree. I don't know what he is waiting for, what he wants to trade Jaime for but smack some sense into him. We are his blood, tell him to ignore whatever the northern lords are telling him and let Sansa free. Her engagement still stands but I expect that to change. Please continue to protect Jaime, I know by your honour as a Tully you will protect him from Robb and the Northerners. I love you Mother and so does Sansa, she just wants to go home.

Love Rayna

The War of the Five Kings has begun.