Eighty Six

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Rayna

By the time I return to my room it's far later than I expected. Jaime's sitting on the edge of the bed waiting for me.
"I missed you at dinner", he says casually but when he sees the look on my face he turns suspicious "Rayna where were you?"
"I can certainly promise I wasn't with another man", I laugh trying to play it off but he knows me too well. Then I realise my excuse is technically a lie because I was, however certainly not in the way he might think.
"Do you honestly think I'm worried that my pregnant wife is turning to another man?" he laughs as he removes his hand for bed "Whats going on sweetheart?"
Jaime is the one person I trust more than anyone else in the world, more than my own blood. My closest confidante. If I can't trust him then who can I trust.
"I've been hiding something from you", I blurt out and I can tell that's definitely not what he expected.
"I'm sure whatever it is I've hidden far worse", he points out and well I can't argue with that.
"Not worse but possibly equal", I say which makes his eyebrows raise.
"You aren't sleeping with Jon are you?", he asks jokingly "Because that's the only equivalent I can come up with"
When I shake my head he realises I'm being very serious and takes my hand to draw me closer "Sweetheart I promise that whatever you need to tell me it will be okay"
If I share my doubts with Sansa and Arya they'll only worry and try to carry it out themselves without informing me and that will lead to an even greater mess, and Bran well I doubt he'll say much. Jaime is the only person I can truly trust.
"I've spent the night plotting with Varys", I confess abruptly and that definitely wasn't what her expected.
"To do what?" he asks slowly and there's a lump in my throat as I dare speak the words.
"To kill Daenerys"
That leaves him completely speechless, he tries to find words but for once he can't find any.
"You've seen what she is capable of Jaime", I say kneeling in front of him and putting my hands in his lap "I can't risk her deciding that we are her enemy"
"You're willing to become a Queenslayer?" he asks in disbelief which wasn't the response I expected but as someone who's killed a monarch he might understand more than I thought.
"Well not me, Varys most likely or Arya if needed"
"Arya?" He exclaims "She's in on this as well?"
"And Sansa and Bran", I ramble needing to let it out, to let my guilt out "If Daenerys decides that Jon has the better claim then she will kill him"
"Slow down", he says helping me to my feet and sitting me on the edge of the bed "What do you mean a better claim?"
Shit I forgot to mention that part "That's the part I've been hiding", I begin not knowing quite how to explain "Jon's a true born Targaryen"
"What?" he asks seeming more confused than anything else "Unless he's Daenerys's secret twin brother that's not possible, oh gods that would mean he's been fucking his twin sister"
I give him a look and he very quickly goes quiet knowing that he can't say much, I could almost laugh if it wasn't such a serious moment.
"No, his mother was Lyanna Stark and his father was Rhaegar Targaryen, they were married in secret", I explain "My Father took in his nephew and raised him as his bastard son because he knew Robert would have had him murdered as a baby"
"Of course he did, it makes sense", Jaime murmurs as he processes this. He has said before when telling stories that Rhaegar seemed like a decent man, nothing like his father "Roberts rebellion was built on a lie"
"Well not quite", I say "The Mad King still did burn my grandfather and uncle alive as well as countless others, Robert went to war for Lyanna but everyone else rebelled because of the Mad King"
"True", he agrees nodding his head somewhat vacantly "So Daenerys would be Jons aunt?"
"Yes"
"I don't know if that's better or worse", he ponders "Does she know about this?"
"Yes but unlike the rest of us she's not concerned about the incest", I say, however incest clearly doesn't phase Jaime "Jon told her before the battle, I figured it out when I saw Jon riding Rhaegal when they arrived here and Bran confirmed it"
"You can certainly keep a secret", he comments but there's no judgement in his voice "Ned didn't even tell Catelyn the truth"
"I wish he did"
It would have saved both her and Jon a lot of grief over the years but I can understand why he didn't. Even now I feel guilt divulging it but everything my father did was to protect Jon, I must do the same.
"So explain to me again why you've suddenly made this decision besides the fact Jon is the rightful heir"
I don't know if I told him all this so I could let go of the weight on my shoulders or to rationalise my actions but here I am. There are a thousand reasons I could give, a thousand times where fear has crossed my mind but all I can say is "They say when a Targaryen is born the gods flip a coin, Varys and Tyrion thought hers had landed but now we're not so sure. I think her coin is about to land and the world will be running when it does"
After a long moment of thought he agrees "I think you're right, I knew the Mad King and I've seen her, little things just bring me back to all those years ago, like when someone questions her decisions or simply the look in her eyes when she talks about power and using those dragons to take it"
"You've seen it too?" I ask and he nods.
"I have but I haven't said anything since I was under the impression you two were friendly again well at some point you were at least"
"I never forgot that day when she attacked the Lannister troops, she would have burned them all if they didn't surrender, if I didn't step in between them and the dragon", I remember but that's not my main concern "After the battle it's become clear that she refuses to listen or take the advice of those advising her, it's even more worrying that she was willing to put her men to the slaughter to defy me"
"That was certainly not a good decision", he agrees "I was on the field, even her commanders hesitated before giving the order to charge"
"Varys has seen monarchs rise and fall, he fears Daenerys far more than he ever feared anyone else, even Joffrey" I say cringing at the memories it brings me "Even I fear her more because she has the means to cause a destruction none of them were even capable of imagining"
He wraps an arm around my shoulders and I curl in close to him and bury my face in the crook of his neck.
"Do you think it's wrong what I'm doing?"
"No", he says immediately, running his hand down my back to soothe me "You said that Brans even part of it, the Three Eyed Raven whatever that means thinks it is the right decision.
"I asked him what he's seen", I tell him as I recall the words that made my decision final "He said fire and blood"
The look in Jaimes eyes only makes me more certain "I made the decision to kill the Mad King to avoid slaughter, I wish I had killed him long before he became properly mad"
"So you agree?" I ask wanting his confirmation that it is the right decision and he gives it.
"I agree but I don't think you should be too involved, if she ever discovered you had even thought of doing this then she would burn Winterfell to the ground with all of us inside"
He's right. If she ever found proof she would burn us all but Varys and I have already taken precautions. Whatever risk we are taking outweighs the risk of doing nothing.
"If she does claim the Iron Throne do you not think she won't try to claim the North?" I ask him and he knows that as a Queen I must eliminate any threats "Jaime you know what lengths I would go to defend my home and my family"
He knows very well the lengths I have gone to and he knows I won't let them be in vain.
I expect him to argue but instead he takes my hand in his and says "It's not just your home and your family, it's ours"
Our home. Our family. Our fight.
"Will you stand by me Jaime?" I ask gripping his hand tightly.
"I married you didn't I?"
My hands bury themselves in his hair as I kiss him. My husband, my protector and my partner. With him by my side there is nothing I cannot face. I find myself smiling as his beard scratches against my cheek, he truly is looking like a Northerner. He smiles adoringly as I pull away and run my thumb along his cheek.
"I will always stand by you", he promises kissing me again softly "Tell me, what exactly is the plan?"
A knock on the door interrupts us and before I can fly into a panic Jaime pulls my hand towards him to snap me out of it.
"It's alright, I'll get the door", he says but before he can move I'm on my feet and holding a knife behind my back as I answer the door.
Maester Wolkan stands there straightening his robes "Your Grace, you asked me earlier if I could come by to make sure everything is alright with the pregnancy"
I laugh nervously "Oh that's right, I'm a bit occupied at the moment but I will see you in the morning"
He excuses himself and I make sure to lock the door when I shut it.
"Rayna breathe", Jaime says calmly "Now tell me what the plan is"
I find myself circling the room as I try to put it into a simple explanation while he listens intently.
"Varys will be keeping an extremely close eye on her, he still believes there is still a chance that she may be saved but we have both agreed it's slim. He needs to be extremely careful to make sure her army will remain intact to fight Cersei. He will convince her to name an heir in case anything happens before or during the battle. Upon that if he believes that she has reached a point of no return then she will be poisoned and will make sure it is blamed on Cersei, or if that is not possible Arya will take her out as a last resort. Upon her death the army will go to her heir and Cersei shall be dealt with. I made sure that I will be kept very distant from it, if anything were to go wrong my part would not be revealed unless it was tortured out of him"
He seems content with this and then he asks "Would she name Jon as her heir?"
"Possibly", I answer as the part I've been dreading approaches "But he would not accept it, therefore it would go to-"
"You", he finishes seeming unsurprised "Is it really what you want?"
It's something I've thought about greatly these past few months. The answer has always been the same, I only rationalise my want for it differently. Although as my stomach grows I am constantly reminded of what I truly want.
"Yes", I answer honestly "However it is not what I want most"
I return to him and caress his face "What I want most is what I've always wanted, to keep my family safe, our family safe"
"What about the North?" is all he asks. Not hostily but in genuine confusion "It seems that the Queen in the North should be in the North"
That is something I have also given much thought too. Soon it may be the hardest decision I have ever had to make but at the same time the easiest.
"I love my home I truly do but I clash with the Northern lords more than occasionally and I spent a long part of my reign on Dragonstone", I remind him "I have already named Sansa as my heir until our children come of age which I have discussed with her"
I wait for him to speak but he remains silent in deep thought.
"Jaime?"
"You seem to have this figured out", he comments not quite meeting my eye.
"I do", I say struggling to read him "Look at me"
When he looks up at me his eyes are filled with a determination I did not expect.
"We will do this together", he decides "Just be honest with me and let me know before you do anything like this"
"I will", I promise him realising that I probably should have let him know about my plans before I decided to see Varys.
"Then I will be by your side when you take the Iron Throne", he promises kissing my hand and then pulling me closer so he can kiss my stomach "On one condition"
"And what's that?"
He smiles as he says "I get to take you to Casterly Rock when the babies are born"
"Of course", I smile as I kiss him and find myself in his lap straddling him.
"And if it is you who goes to overthrow Cersei then I will march the army to the Red Keep myself", he vows. He would march against his own sister, his own blood and his own house for me.
"You are the only man I would trust to do so"
He embraces me passionately and I pray to the old gods and the new that this will work, that Varys will pull this off. If he doesn't then we may all suffer greatly for it.

The following morning I go to farewell Jon.
"I wasn't sure if you'd come to see me", he admits seeming relieved.
"What was it you said when we were fighting once?" I ask him.
"Something that got me slapped"
I roll my eyes and can't help but laugh.
"That we must not fight a war amongst ourselves"
He gives me a warm smile "You're right and I'm sorry Rayna, I truly am"
His apology takes me by surprise "You are?"
"I've been acting like a fool and I know that now", he confesses as he brings me in for a warm hug then he whispers in my ear "You aren't the only one who is afraid of her"
I look over his shoulder to see Daenerys speaking with Missandei near the gate, thankfully distracted and out of earshot.
"What happened Jon", I ask quietly.
"She has not taken kindly to me pulling away from her", he admits but I can tell there is more than that. I pull away to meet his eyes so he cannot lie to me.
"What did she say?"
"Let it be fear"
If even Jons woken up to it then it's worse than Varys and I originally thought.
I hold my brother by the shoulders and look him sternly in the eye "Jon you must be careful, I know that you are honourable but promise me that you will do whatever you must to protect yourself and our family"
"I promise"
I bring him in for another embrace and bury my head in the fur cloak over his shoulder as tears fill my eyes as I cling to him. To my brother. I've finally gotten him back and I will not lose him again to Daenerys.
When I look up she is standing behind Jon waiting patiently.
"Are you ready?" she asks him and he nods obediently. She then turns to me "Lady Stark, thank you for providing your men to the crown, they will be put to good use"
To slaughter.
"Yes well there sure will be a feast when Jon returns home with them", I smile much to her dissatisfaction but before she goes south I must know "Tell me what do you plan on doing with Cersei"
"If she is not killed during the battle then she will have the dragons mercy", she says proudly. Out of the corner of my eye I see Sansa and Arya appear and they stand within earshot.
"I don't see how she would be killed during the battle since Tyrion has assured me there will be little bloodshed", I tell her and I see that look in her eye again.
"I will do whatever necessary for the throne", she vows curtly and I can almost see Jon flinch.
Over her shoulder I see both Tyrion and Varys are also listening in.
"And if that is fire and blood?" I ask her knowing I'm treading on dangerous ground but if Tyrion hears this then perhaps he may just see the truth as well.
She looks as if she may breathe fire herself as she declares "I once vowed that I will lay waste to armies, burn cities to the ground and that I shall take what is mine with fire and blood and I will take it"
And with that I have put fear and doubt into the minds of those closest to her. Pressed just the right nerves to remind them of what they try to forget. I may not be the man who swings the sword but I am giving it to the executioner. Now it is up to them.
"Goodbye Daenerys", I say and the only thing that can be heard is the howling of the winds of winter.

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