25 | fate or fade

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🎶 Someday, The Boy - Kim Feel

= All the moments of my past only brought my youth to sadness. Even on nights I fell asleep alone, I kept that pain with me. Time has since raised me, telling me to step into the world. My past self is asking me now if I'm happy enough to smile. =

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Jaehyun's POV

I've never asked for much in my entire life. I lived as Jaehyun and only Jaehyun for years without telling anyone that I am the younger brother of a celebrity idol - EXO Baekhyun.

I don't even tell people that I have a brother, because the spotlight always shone over him when they find out we are family. It isn't jealousy, I don't get petty over shit like that, but people are social animals that change wherever the tide turns.

The people I mixed with were all like that. I realised how their priorities change when my famous brother comes into the picture.

The friendship with my best buddies turned bland when I noticed how they kept hanging around me to get favours from my brother. The girls I dated were worse. Like pigeons flocking to the bigger fish in the sea, I would end up as their tool to get in touch with my brother instead.

I got sick and tired eventually and shut them all out after learning how fickle relationships can be. At some point I decided to never disclose my relationship with Baekhyun because I didn't want to experience what a failed friendship or relationship is like again.

And it's not that I hated my brother for it - in fact Baekhyun and I are really close and I am honestly, really, sincerely happy for my brother's success.

It's just really difficult to live as a brother of a really famous celebrity.

So I thought it was best to keep a fair distance with people because only then, there would be no chances of hurting each other. I decided to stay low profile, thinking that it was okay for me to live like that.

I was ready to get through high school as a loner in class until I met a girl who was just as lonely as me. And really atypical because she was the first person I've seen who completely didn't give a shit about me or any other people.

She was Jisoo.

I can never forget the day we exchanged our first words only because we were paired for a project. Her complete disinterest in me was what sparked my interest in her... weird but funny right? At first, I liked how she drew strict boundaries between her and everyone else, so I thought - why not have a friend like her who knew how to keep the right distance?

It worked perfectly well for the rest of high school and until graduation, but what developed, however, were my feelings for her as we spent more time together.

This girl has this irresistible charm that gets me smiling and staring all the time, but she never knew.

I was the one who knew it all.

I knew how much she tries to be a devil when all she has is a heart of gold. She never wanted to show her goodness so I have never tried to change her 'dark' ways. I only silently admired her thinking that our distance was just right and that I could be satisfied with the way we were.

So even when she seemed interested in me at some point, I pretended not to know.

But my world went crashing down on the day she started talking to me about another guy, and I couldn't do anything about it but be there for her as a friend.

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