Chapter 41

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Chapter 41: "I want someone to see the dark parts of my mind, the messy, the scary, the destructive, and still choose to stay."



"Just text me or manong Ben when your shift is done, ate," said Jeremy as they dropped me off at the hospital where I'm having my training. 

My shift starts at 11pm and ends at 7 in the morning. Hatid-sundo ako dahil na rin sa schedule ko. Jeremy took his promise to Shin seriously; he takes care of me and acts like my older brother sometimes which is kind of cute. 

As soon as the car left, my smile faded. I took a deep breath and with a heavy heart entered the hospital. I didn't waste time and started doing the duties that were assigned to me right away. It's not to impress the head nurse, but to avoid getting scolded by her which was always the case during my first two months here.

"Maya, it's time for your med-" Natigilan ako ng hindi ko nakita sa loob ng kwarto ang pasyente. "Maya? Maya?" 

Napapikit na lang ako. This isn't the first time she has escaped from her room in the middle of the night. As expected, I was reprimanded by the head nurse. Hindi na ako nangatwiran kahit pakiramdam ko ay wala naman akong kasalanan dahil kakaumpisa pa lang naman ng shift ko. Even if I voiced out my side, she wouldn't listen anyway. Lagi niya akong pinag-iinitan. 

I just heaved out a deep sigh and went to look for Maya. Luckily, I found her on the rooftop, stargazing. 

"Maya, you're supposed to be in your room."

She rolled her eyes upon seeing me. She's been staying in the hospital for a long time. Isa siya sa mga iniiwasan ng mga nurses dito. She's known for being a pain in the ass. A brat through and through. 

"Let me guess, ipinaglihi ka sa dog. Galing maghanap," she said sardonically.

I bit my lower lip, and held myself back from saying anything back. Inirapan niya ako at umalis na. Bahagya pa niyang sinanggi ang balikat ko. Napapikit na lang ako ng mariin.

"Patience, Tam. She's just a teenager," I muttered.

I was so tired by the time my shift ended. Paalis na lang ako ay kinausap pa ako ng head nurse at may ipinagawa sa akin. Kahit pakiramdam ko ay babagsak na ako sa pagod ay pumayag ako. I have to draw blood from a little kid. Nahihirapan ako dahil hindi iyak siya ng iyak at nagpapapasag. Hindi siya makontrol ng nanay niya. 

"Saglit lang ito, baby. Parang kagat lang ng langgam," nakangiting saad ko.

"No! I don't want that! Mommy!"

Pumalahaw siya ng iyak ng itinusok ko na ang karayom. Ang problema dahil sa likot niya nahihirapan akong mahanap ang ugat niya. It didn't help that the mom was glaring at me. Napalunok ako.

"Miss, alam mo ba ang ginagawa mo?" pagsusungit niya sa akin.

"Yes po, Ma'am. Pakihawakan lang po yung ba-"

"Ako na dito, Nurse Tamara," said nurse Hazel. Walang imik na tumabi ako. Mabilis niyang nakuhanan ng dugo ang bata. "Hindi naman masakit, diba?"

"Thank you, nurse," nakangiting saad ng nanay.

"You're welcome po." Bago lumabas ang nanay ay inirapan pa niya ako. Napayuko na lang ako. "Simpleng pagkuha lang ng dugo nahihirapan ka pa. Ano kaya ang magagawa mo ng tama?" inis na baling ni nurse Hazel sa akin.

Hindi na lang ako kumibo. Mabibigat ang mga hakbang na umuwi na ako. "I'm home, Mama."

"Bakit hindi ka nagpasundo, Tam?"

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