Ash x Gary (Palletshipping)

Coming to Terms

I'm startled when Ash reaches for me in the darkness of the auditorium, but I hug him back anyways. He buries his face in the crook of my neck, sending a warmth radiating out from where he touches me to all other parts of my body. I bury my hands in his silky soft hair and just hold this man I love. When I hear him crying, though, a jolt goes through my chest like an electroshock.

Why are you crying, Ash? You always used to be so happy. So impossible to bother. That was part of the draw, you know. But now I've seen you so upset on multiple occasions. What's SO wrong, Ash?

Well, I may not know the answer.

And I may not deserve to hear it.

But I have an idea of how to stop his tears.

I take my hand stuck in Ash's soft, black hair, and I tug his head back.Looking into his warm, brown eyes, my heart starts to race while Ash's tears drizzle to a surprised stop.

I have waited for this moment for I don't know how many years.

Waited through all the separation. All the fighting. All the petty rivalry. All the life changes. All the obstacles.

I lean in, closing my eyes, and carefully press my lips to those of my lifelong best friend. His mouth is silky soft against my own, and I feel like I am melting and boiling all at once. I can smell him all around me—that unique, musky scent that is Ash.

My Ash.

The Ash I love.

I pull back and barely manage to restrain myself from shouting—instead allowing it to come out as a whisper—"I love you."

I am trembling all over with joy and fulfillment—a kid on Christmas Day that finally got the present he wanted.But Ash is white as a ghost, frozen in shock: he doesn't feel the way I do.

A strange, nauseating burning sets in around the vicinity of my heart.

But don't worry...

I'm up to the challenge.

*POV change to Ash*

With a shaky hand, I reach up to wipe away the remnants of my tears caused by Teagan's performance. And in a voice that really isn't mine, I excuse myself from Gary, heading I don't know where.

He kissed me?

How am I supposed to feel about that?

He loves me?

Me?

How could he love me?

I look down at myself, a tingling burning of shame washing over me. I look like a child for god's sake—still dressed up like a new trainer. How could he want me?

I reach down and pull at the ends of my jacket. What does he see in this?

"Ash?"

Huh? I look up and realize I've wandered downstairs to where the contestants are waiting to hear the results of the first round. Teagan's here, staring up at me with a concerned expression on her face. She has her blonde hair down, framing her soft face. And she's wearing a silver kimono with pink cherry blossoms on it. I want to tell her that she did a wonderful job on stage. Or that she looks lovely.

But my mouth isn't working.

Instead, I blurt out: "Your dad kissed me. Your dad told me he loves me."

Teagan's face scrunches up in a bit of discomfort or confusion—I don't know which. "That's nice, Ash. Why are you down here, then?"

Why am I not upstairs with Gary? I frown. "I don't know," I whisper, tilting my head down in a motion that should've sent my hat to the floor. When it doesn't, I reach up to feel my head and find only hair up there. Oh, my hat fell off before when Gary was running his hands through my hair...Right...

I feel so confused right now. I don't like it. I don't feel like me.

"Ash?! Ash, don't start crying!"

What's Teagan talking about? I'm not crying!

I put a hand to my face and realize that I am. But that only makes me feel like crying more.

"Oh...here. I think I know what might make you feel better. Give me your jacket."

I look at her outstretched arms for a minute and then reluctantly comply. I don't have any better ideas.

She reaches up as far as she can, which apparently isn't enough because she pulls me down by my black shirt, and then messes with my hair. When she lets me go, I straighten up and just stare at her. 'Cause what else am I supposed to do?

"There," she puts her hands on her hips, looking incredibly satisfied with herself, "We can go shopping later, too, but, for now, you look normal enough."

Oh. I just keep staring at her.

"Here, have a look in a mirror." Teagan gives me a pitying look and then directs me to look at myself.

Huh. I do feel better. Maybe Gary having a daughter really isn't such a bad thing.

Maybe having Gary love me really isn't such a bad thing.