Chapter-44

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The warm water around my body is ironic as compared to the coldness my heart is feeling

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The warm water around my body is ironic as compared to the coldness my heart is feeling.
I feel trapped in a maze with no way out. The guilt of leaving Lorenzo was already burdening my heart but now my baby, my son is sick and I can't even take care of him. The worry is eating me alive.

Will he be alright?

There is nothing more I want in this moment than being besides him. I know seeing my care for him and Xavier hurts Lorenzo deeply but I can't help it.

I am his mother. It's in my blood to take care of him. To worry for him.

How do I make Lorenzo understand this?
I tilt my head back against the tub. The warm water providing soothing comfort to my aching body.

I close my eyes enjoying the pinch of the hot water. If not mentally but atleast physically this is realxing. I feel myself get sleepy. My eyelids drooping against my will. I try to push them open but they are closing on their own accord.

...................

The water which was soothing is now becoming suffocating. I feel breathlessness due to the lack of the oxygen. I open my eyes but all I see is water. I am in an ocean with only water around me. I try to swim upwards but to no avail. I can't breathe I have to get out, else I'll die.
I push my hand trying to swim but still I am stuck. I feel my lungs burning.

Air.

I need air.

I jerk open my eyes and sit up straight. I inhale deeply trying to make up for the lack of the oxygen. I turn my head and see that I am in a familiar room.

A woman immediately comes rushing by my side and asks.

"Are you fine?"

"What happened?"
I ask her back.

"You don't remember? You almost killed yourself by drowning."
She questions me and then explains me.

I put my head between my palms pondering on whether I did what she just said. The last thing I remember was sitting in the bathroom wondering whether nikaloi is fine?

Nikaloi.

"Where is Lorenzo?"
I ask her

"He is in his office."
She replies.

I immediately get out of my bed and make my way towards his office.

"You can't get up. You need to rest."
She yells from behind.
But paying her no mind I move forward.

.........................

Standing in front of lorenzo's office I contemplate on what I'll say to him?
My mind has officially gone out.
It is tired.

Giving up all the thoughts I gently push down the handle and slightly open the door of his office peeking in.
But it's too dark for me to see anything clearly. So I swiftly move in and close the door behind me.

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