A Court Of Fire And Pain

Azriel might be in love

Well I have a lot more motivation and many ideas when writing about ships instead of the actual plot and important parts of this story, so here's another chapter :D

Chapter 36 Azriel:
It was about time we got back, but I couldn't bring myself to wake the male lying next to me. I had been playing with the same shadow for hours in an attempt to not look at his face. Damn he was pretty.
That's one of the things that I was confused about with this entire thing. Why him? He must hate me because of it. He was basically perfect looking and I just knew everybody he met took a second glance. And he was an outgoing warrior.
But me... I was a quiet spymaster, and while I didn't want to say I was ugly, I didn't have a bright presence like he did. So why were we matched together?
I had to stop thinking about this.
We really should be heading back, so I shook Fenrys awake. "We need to go."
He yawned and pushed the hair away from his face.
Could he try and not be adorable as soon as he woke up?
He sat up and looked me over. "We aren't going to fly back right?"
Oh yeah, he had screamed the entire time we were in the air before. "No. We'll shadow travel."
He grinned. "Alright then, let's go!"
I took his arm and tried to ignore how close we were. We made the rest of the trip without eye contact.
When we got back Feyre led us to the dining room. "Where have you guys been? We've done all the planning without you."
My cheeks warmed up as I thought of an answer. I couldn't very well tell her we'd been lying side by side on a cliff watching the sunset.
"We were checking the town. If news of what's going on has reached the people they'll start to panic. We were going around to try and make sure everyone was doing alright and everything seemed fine. Although I'm not convinced about the authenticity of the responses, a lot of them were distracted by Fenrys."
They both chuckled and I smiled. But now that I said it, I had to actually do it for real. "So I'll be going around again just to check."
Feyre pushed me into a seat. "Alright, but eat first. Elain made dinner again."
Elain's food was always good, so I began to eat. I unwillingly kept glancing at Fenrys throughout the whole meal, and I caught him looking at me as well. That was until he spoke, a look of confusion in his face.
"Where's Aideon?"
Oh yeah, now that he mentioned it I realized there was one seat empty.
Aelin was the one who answered. "Just something you missed while you were away. He went back to Terrasen to ready the armies."
"Oh. Alright then."
That made sense, he was the battle master if I remembered correctly.
After dinner I flew into town. I went and asked around, but nobody seemed to sense anything off. Good. I ended up going to the store and buying a bunch of ingredients Elain asked me too. Elain. Out of all of them I felt the most relaxed in her presence. She reminded me so much of...
After I paid and dropped everything off in the kitchen, I got the sense someone was talking about me. I followed my shadows to a secluded hallway. On the other end were Fenrys and Connal. I couldn't see them, but I could hear what they were saying.
"So how was your date?"
My heart stopped for a moment.
Apparently Fenrys had a similar but louder reaction considering all the coughing and spluttering.
"It wasn't a date! I got in trouble and he helped me!"
"Yeah for the entire day. Sure."
I brought my hand to my face. Oh by the cauldron why did this have to happen to me?
I could hear the indignation in his voice as he replied.
"This was your plan wasn't it?"
"Well yea. I hoped that by locking myself in my room you'd get bored and end up hanging out with Azriel. I didn't mean for you to get into trouble but that's on you, not me."
"Connal why?!"
"Because I want you to be happy."
I could sense the mood change. This was getting serious now.
"I want you to have fun and hang out with your mate. That's not a bad thing!"
"But what if he doesn' t want to be my mate? Connal he's in love with someone else!"
Wait... that's his response? That's what he thought? True, I told him I was in love with Mor, but that was a lie. I realized a while ago that I had never truly loved her and was only using it as an excuse to keep myself distant from possible deep relationships. I was scared. But why would he be worried about that?
I focused back on the conversation.
"We're just acquaintances and I don't know if he wants to stop there. Sure maybe I want to be his friend, but I can't tell if that's what he wants too! So please don't make things awkward between us and ruin it before it gets started."
Was that really what he thought? Was I that hard to read? Of course I wanted to at least be his friend.
"I'm sorry Fenrys. I won't try this again. As long as you work on your relationship by yourself ok?"
"Ok."
They parted ways, and after a moment of taking in this information, I followed Connal.
He knew I was there, and turned around as he reached his door. "Hello."
I took a breath and looked him in the eye. "Last time we really spoke I told you not to throw your life away and stay by his side. I still don't care about you, but that's changed."
He tilted his head to the side. "Oh?"
"Do what you want. If it hurts him I'll be there. But promise to protect him and help him as long as you're standing."
He smiled slightly. "Of course. That's always been the plan. I'm glad you're on my side Azriel. You're finally coming to your senses about my brother. Good. And remember that I still don't care about you either."
I nodded and walked away. It seems we're on the same page for now.
I should go to bed, but I had the urge to check in Fenrys one last time. So I shadowed into his room to find him fast asleep. Good. He needed rest after that monster beat him up. I peaked at the side of his chest, and it seemed fine.
While he was sleeping earlier, I had bandaged his wounds. It hadn't been my best job since I was trying not to wake him, but it seemed to have done the trick.
He must be having a good dream, because he started to smile.
And looking at that soft innocent smile, I was hit with one hard fact.
I would do anything to protect this male.